October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: Money

That’s The Way The Cookie Repeatedly Crumbles

| Pittsburgh, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money

(I’m a cashier at the local grocery store. Today I’m training a new employee on how to use the register. A woman comes up with a box of cookies. I scan it.)

Woman: “No! The price on those is too high. Cancel it.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I cancel it.)

Woman: “Scan it again.”

Me: “Um, okay?”

(I scan it again.)

Woman: “No, the price is still too high. Cancel it.”

Me: “Uh…”

(I cancel it again.)

Woman: “Scan it again.”

Me: “Ma’am, the price isn’t going to change.”

Woman: “You don’t know that!”

(This goes on for several minutes to the point where I have to call a manager over to deal with. Eventually she leaves, without the cookies.)

Trainee: “Did that really just happen?”

Me: “Yup.”

Trainee: “Is customer service always like this?”

Me: “Yup.”

Trainee: “I should get my stupidity vaccine updated, shouldn’t I?”

Me: “Yup.”

A Cent-less Amount

| St. Clairsville, OH, USA | Crazy Requests, Money

Customer: “How much is it to copy something?”

Me: “Is it in color or black and white?”

Customer: “Black and white.”

Me: “It’s eleven cents.”

Customer: “How much is it for two copies?”

Me: “Twenty-two cents.”

Customer: “How much is it for five copies?”

Me: “Fifty-five cents.”

Customer:” How much is it for 10 copies?”

Me: “It’s still going to be eleven cents per copy.”

Customer: “Well, is there a break in the price after so many copies?”

Me: “Yes. After 1001 copies, the price goes down to ten cents a copy.”

Customer: “Oh, no! I just need two copies!”

In The Case Of Ulysses Versus Jackson:

| MI, USA | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

(My father is the owner and I am back from college helping him during summer break. I am a 25-year-old male. A woman gets some things and pays with a $50 dollar bill and the man behind her waits patiently. The man then comes up pays for his things with a $20. I hand him his change.)

Man: “Hey, I paid with a fifty! Where’s the rest of my change?”

Me: “No, you didn’t. The change is correct.”

Man: “You’re trying to rip me off! I paid with a f****** FIFTY!”

(Knowing what he’s trying to pull and knowing my dad hates dealing with people like this, I open the till.)

Me: “Nope, no fifty in here.”

Man: “Y… Yes, there is! You’re trying to f****** rip me off!”

Me: “I haven’t received a fifty all day. Now that I look closer I realize you paid with a ten dollar bill while your order was $15.90. I am going to need another 5.90 please.”

(I put my hand out as if I am expecting money. He is completely thrown off at what I have done and gets flustered.)

Man: “I… I want to see a manager NOW!”

Me: “I am the owner’s son. If you don’t pay off the rest of your order I’m going to call the cops.”

(I still have my hand out as if to take his money. The man steps back and looks around stammering to himself.)

Man: “I paid with a $20 and you gave me the correct change.” *bolts out the door*

Ripping Your Credit To Pieces

| Portland, OR, USA | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

(I am at the checkout and overhear this conversation between my manager and a customer she just finished helping.)

Customer: “You gave me a ripped dollar bill. I need you to replace it.”

Manager: “I didn’t give you the ripped bill.”

Customer: “Are you trying to call me a liar? I want a manager!”

Manager: “Ma’am, I am a manager, and you just paid with a credit card.”

Use Your Inside Voice Invoice

| Tulsa, OK, USA | Extra Stupid, Money

(I work in a cafe and store that serves a large corporate staff which works in the building, and only them. I am in the back office working on orders and balancing accounts when I overhear an exchange between a member of my staff and a customer escalating.)

Cashier: “Okay, ma’am, all told that will be $11.30.”

Customer: “Ya’ll are too f****** proud of your f****** food. No way in h*** am I paying that!”

Cashier: “I am sorry, ma’am, but all our prices are clearly posted and this is the total for the items you have selected.”

Customer: “Like h***! I worked in food, I know how it works, and this is overpriced! I want to see your b****-a** manager; where’s he hiding!?”

(I come out of the office and address the customer.)

Me: “Ma’am, I have heard, quite clearly, everything you have said, and I assure you the prices are right.”

Customer: “Prove it. Prove that the s*** cost you four bucks!”

(I dig through my paperwork and find the appropriate invoice and bring it out to the customer. She looks through it with an expert eye.)

Customer: “See! F*** you! This s*** should have only been like $13!”

Cashier: “Okay, ma’am, that’ll be $13.”

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