Category: Money

No ID, No Idea, Part 12

| Rapid City, SD, USA | Money, Theme Of The Month, Tourists/Travel

(I work at a water park about 20 minutes from Mt. Rushmore, so we have a lot of tourism. We have a gift shop that also allows you to rent towels and lifejackets. In order to rent, you must keep your ID with us. This is so you can remember to return items rented. A tour bus pulls up with a group from the local reservation, as well as a family from another state.)

Tour Bus Customer: “Hi, I want to rent four towels and a lifejacket for my daughter please.”

Me: “Certainly! Let me get your daughter in this jacket, and it will $27 with $11 as the deposit. We also need to hold your ID until we get these back.”

Tour Bus Customer: “Sure, no problem.”

(The tour bus customer yells to his wife to give him his wallet and hands me cash and his ID. This goes on for another few groups from the bus, and finally the group from another state is left.)

Out-of-state Customer: “My family needs three towels.”

Me: “Sure! It will be $15 with $6 deposit, and your ID, sir.”

Out-of-state Customer: “What?! I most certainly will not! Your sign says $3 for rentals, and you will not have my ID, because that’s how identity theft happens.”

Me: “I could understand your concern, but I do not touch the IDs. They stay in this little safe under the counter to prevent that. I only open it to retrieve the IDs. As for the rentals, it does say $3, but there is an additional $2 deposit. I guarantee you your money back; the ID is just something to make you remember to bring our stuff back. If you truly are concerned, I could have my manager hold it, or I’ll make an exception and you could leave $20 and still get $11 back.”

Out-of-state Customer: “I most certainly will not do either. I expect to pay $9 and no higher. And my ID stays with me.”

Me: “I understand, really. But your ID is safe, and you have to pay a deposit or I can’t rent to you.”

Out-of-state Customer: “I will do no such thing!”

(At this point, the out-of-state customer is starting to get angry, and is sliding things from the counter to the floor.)

Tour Bus Customer: “Listen, sir, your ID is safe with the lady, and if you continue to disrespect her, you will be forced out off the area and banned from any lands around.”

(The out-of-state customer turns to face the tour bus customer, who stands at 6’6″, about 275 lbs, and all muscle. Luckily, I know him, as he is my uncle’s best friend.)

Out-of-state Customer: *stammers* “Uh, fine.”

(The out-of-state customer throws in the cash and his ID, and takes off into the park.)

Tour Bus Customer: “Let me know if he gives you any more trouble today.”

(Thankfully, I think the out-of-state customer was scared straight, as his daughter came back only for the ID, and told me to keep the deposit as a tip!)

Related:
No ID, No Idea, Part 11
No ID, No Idea, Part 10
No ID, No Idea, Part 9

Loonie Over A Toonie, Part 3

| Niagara Falls, ON, Canada | Canada, Geography, Money, Theme Of The Month, Tourists/Travel

(I work at a gift shop in Canada, just beside the US border, so we usually have a lot of American tourists. Our gift shop is one of the only places in the area that lets a customer perform their transactions in US currency.)

Customer: “Do you take real money?”

Me: *confused* “What do you mean?”

Customer: “Real money!”

(The customer holds up US currency.)

Me: “Oh, yes we take Canadian or American, and we’ll give you American change back if we have some in the till.”

Customer: “Good, you people here are weird about your money.”

Related:
Loonie Over A Toonie, Part 2
Loonie Over A Toonie

Count On A Teenager

| FL, USA | Math & Science, Money

(I am doing some shopping. I am in the soda aisle, when an older customer comes up to me. I am 18.)

Customer: “Excuse me; I was hoping you could do me a favor. I don’t have a calculator, and I only need one of these.”

(The customer points to sodas marked five for $11.)

Customer: “Could you figure out how much one is?”

Me: “Of course! One is $2.20.”

Customer: *suddenly angry* “If you didn’t want to do it, you could have just said so! There’s no way some stupid teenager like you could figure that out without a calculator! You teenagers can’t even add or subtract without one; how could you possibly work out decimals without one? You just made up a number to get me to go away! I’m on a budget, trying to make sure I have enough to pay for my groceries, and here you are telling me an incorrect number! You could have completely ruined my budget for the rest of the month by making me go over!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry that you think I was trying to do that to you.”

(I pull out my phone and do the math.)

Me: “The price is still $2.20. But just because you only know stupid teenagers, doesn’t mean you should assume everyone you meet is the same. Might I remind you that you had me do it for you, because you didn’t have a calculator?”

If They Were Good At Math They Wouldn’t Gamble

| ME, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Money

(I work as a cashier for the only supermarket in town. A couple comes in and buys cigarettes, alcohol, sandwiches and lottery tickets.)

Man: “I would like to cash this lottery ticket in.”

Me: “Okay, no problem.”

(I bring the ticket to the scanner, and it rings in as a $50.00 winner.)

Me: “Would you like me to deduct the winnings from your purchase, or have the cash?”

Woman: “Just deduct it from the purchase.”

(I deduct the $50.00, and ring in the rest of the groceries. After the deduction, the order comes up to about $35.00, and they give me a $50.00 bill.)

Me: “Here’s your change, $15.00. Thank you, have a great day!”

Woman: “Hey! You didn’t give us all our change back! Where’s our $50.00?!”

Me: “Your order came up to $35.00, in which I gave you $15.00 in change, because the $50.00 was deducted in the beginning.”

Man: “But our order didn’t f****** come up to that much!”

Me: “Well, you have $30.00 worth of scratch tickets, alcohol, groceries, sandwiches, and cigarettes. The whole order would’ve come up to about $85.00 altogether.”

Man: “But where’s our f****** $50.00?!”

Me: “Sir, if I had given you the $50.00 cash, and the whole order came up to $85.00, in which you would’ve given me two $50.00 dollar bills, and I would’ve given you $15.00 in change still.”

Woman: “What the h*** are you talking about? We still didn’t buy that much! You must’ve overcharged us! I demand your manager!”

Me: “Ma’am, the manager is not present at the moment. I will ring your purchase, and your receipt will show that I have not overcharged you.”

(I print the receipt, and show them that the $50.00 was deducted in the beginning at their request, and the rest of the groceries were expensive still.)

Man: “You know what? You don’t know how to do your simple f****** job! No wonder you’re just a cashier and not in college!”

Me: “Sir, if you’d wish, you can leave your name and number with me, and I will give you a refund if we find my drawer is any money over tomorrow.)

Woman: “Forget it, you stupid b****!”

Man: “Just keep it, you greedy a**-hole!”

(They both storm out with their groceries. I ask the next day and the drawer did not come up over. When they came in next, they were given a lecture on how they spoke to me.)

Math Skills Are In The Lower 25 Per Cent

, | Seattle, WA, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Math & Science, Money, Top

(While working at an ice cream store, there is a sale for buy one ice cream, get one for 25 cents. We are jam packed, and I am manning one of the registers.)

Me: “Thank you for coming to [store], what can I get for you?”

Customer: “I’d like five large ice creams, please.”

Me: “Sounds great; your total comes to $14.”

Customer: “I thought there was a sale for 25 cents?”

Me: “Yes, it’s buy one, get one for 25 cents.”

Customer: “So then why am I paying so much?”

Me: “A regular large is $4.50, so three of those adds up to $13.50, plus two for 25 cents.”

Customer: “The fifth one is supposed to be 25 cents.”

Me: “You have to buy one first for it to be 25 cents. Would you like to buy one more blizzard?”

Customer: “No, I don’t want six ice creams; the last one needs to be 25 cents!”

Me: “Ma’am, I can’t give you the fifth one for 25 cents; you need to buy another ice cream first.”

Customer: “GIVE ME THE ICE CREAM FOR 25 CENTS!”

Me: “Ma’am, I can’t. Its buy one, get one for 25 cents.”

Customer: “I refuse to speak with you; get me your manager now!”

Me: “Ma’am, we’re very busy and—”

Customer: “GET ME YOUR MANAGER!”

Me: “Ma’am, please we are very busy—”

Customer: “I refuse to speak with such an idiot.”

Me: “Let me get her for you…”

(I pull my manager away from making 15 ice creams. She is very much annoyed that I have to get her.)

Manager: “What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “This imbecile of an employee will not give me my 25 cent ice cream.”

(The manager looks at my screen, and sees five ice creams.)

Manager: “You ordered five ice creams, correct?”

Customer: “Yes, and I want my 25 cent ice cream!”

Manager: “It’s a buy one, get one for 25 cents. You have five ice creams. Simple math tells us that the fifth is at regular price. So either pay for your f***** ice cream, or the get the h*** out of my store.”

Customer: “Well EXCUSE ME! I’ll take my ice creams, but I’m never coming back!”

Manager: “Good, you weren’t going to be allowed back anyway!”

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