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    Category: Money

    Prices Are Frozen

    | OH, USA | Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Money

    (I work at an ice-cream stand. A herd of small children come up to the counter. None are older than eight years old.)

    Child: “Umm, miss, how much is that?”

    Me: “How much is the cone? Or how much is one scoop on the cone?”

    Child: “How much is the cone?”

    Me: “Well, this cone is technically free. If you get one scoop on the sugar cone, then you only pay for the scoop of ice-cream.”

    Child: “Okay, one sec.”

    (All the children giggle, then run to a woman nearby. They chat for a bit, and then they run back.)

    Child: “How much for the sugar cone?”

    (I tell them, and they again run back to the woman standing nearby. They repeat this charade a few more times by asking the exact same questions, until they all finally order. Each one of them orders one scoop of ice-cream on the sugar cone. Their total comes out to about $30.The woman nearby later comes up and cuts in front of six customers.)

    Woman: “Can I see a receipt for my order?”

    Me: “Sorry, your kids paid in cash, and didn’t want the receipt; I threw it away.”

    Woman: “Okay, well my kids told me that you told them that one scoop on a sugar cone was free. They all got one scoop on a sugar cone. WHY DID THAT COST $30?!”

    Me: “I told them that the cone was free, but the scoop itself was [price].”

    Woman: “That’s not what they told me.”

    Me: “I’m sorry; I did tell them that.”

    Woman: “Wow. You must be the biggest idiot if you cannot convey the price of ice-cream to children!”

    Me: “Sorry, ma’am.”

    (She stands there glaring at me. The next two customers are a couple of guys, who then come up to the register to pay for their order.)

    Guy #1: “Who the h*** hands their kid a 50, and sends them up to an ice-cream stand?”

    (The woman hears him, and stares at him with her jaw dropped.)

    Guy #2: *mocking the woman* “Where is my receipt?! Why are you so dumb?! Why did I have children?!”

    (The woman scoffs loudly, and storms off.)

    Me: “That was awkward.”

    Guy #2: “That was hilarious! She was such a b**** to you!”

    Guy #1: “I don’t think you did anything wrong!”

    (He tips me $20, smiles, then walks away with his friend.)

    A Child Who Knows How To Conduct Himself

    | Norway | Family & Kids, Money, Tourists/Travel

    (I am 12 years old. I am taking the train with my eight-year-old brother. After waiting for the conductor for about an hour without having paid, I get up and look for him. I find him somewhere down the train.)

    Me: “My little brother and I have been riding this train for one hour without paying, and will soon arrive our destination.”

    Conductor: “Okay, just find your seat again. I’ll be right there with you.”

    (After about 10 minutes, he’s back with us. He takes a seat beside us, leans in, and starts talking.)

    Conductor: “I’ve worked this train every day for 20 years. Every day I see kids your age trying to find ways to ride for free. So when you approached me, honest about wanting to pay for yourselves when I had forgotten, you made my day! I have decided to let you ride for free. You should keep the money. Tell your parents that it is yours now, because they raised you to be such honest and good kids, and buy yourselves something nice.”

    Cashier Doesn’t Register The Cash

    | Glasgow, Scotland, UK | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Money

    (I’m showing a new employee the basics of working behind the counter. Everything is going well and it’s a quiet night, so I decide to call my mum and ask if she could lend me some money for the night. As I am on the phone, one of my regular customers comes in. I tell the new employee to have a go of the till on his own. I finish the conversation with my mum.)

    Regular Customer: “Hi, how are you?”

    Me: “I’m alright thanks, yourself?”

    Regular Customer: “Yeah, I’m not too bad. Were you asking your mum to borrow money there?”

    Me: “Yeah, I’m supposed to be going bowling tonight with my friends, but I’m a bit low on cash. She said it would be alright if I paid her back when I get my wages.”

    (We have a chat as we usually do. She tells me she was always borrowing money when she was my age.)

    Regular Customer: “Okay, well I hope you have a nice night!”

    Me: “I will, thanks a lot; see you later.”

    (She leaves, only to come back a minute later, and talks to me incredibly fast.)

    Regular Customer: “You’re always really friendly and have a chat with me. Here, take this; enjoy your night!”

    (She slams a £10 note on the counter, and runs off into the night before I can even say anything.)

    Me: “WHAT? WAIT! THANK YOU?!”

    (I try to catch her to tell her she doesn’t need to do that, but she is away in her car before I can even get out from behind the counter.)

    Me: “I… I don’t even know what just happened. That is the nicest thing that’s ever happened to me.”

    Coworker: “Does this happen a lot?”

    Me: “Never! This never happens. You just witnessed history.”

    Acting Like A Has-Bean

    | Yonkers, NY, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Money

    Customer: “Excuse me, how much is one coffee bean?”

    Me: “One bean?”

    Customer: “Yes, just one.”

    Me: “Can I ask why you want a single bean?”

    Customer: “Just tell me the price!”

    Me: “Uh… well, they’re [price] per pound, so you could try to weigh one bean and work it out from there.”

    Customer: “Perfect!”

    (She weighs one bean. The scale comes up ‘0lb, 0oz’.)

    Me: “Well, I guess if you just want one bean you can take it, although you won’t get much coffee from it.”

    Customer: “That won’t be a problem.”

    (She grabs the entire stack of bulk bags, and begins placing a single bean in each one, weighing it, and then printing out a price tag.)

    Me: “Wha… hey! You can’t—”

    (My manager suddenly appears.)

    Manager: “Shush, let her finish.”

    (It takes the customer nearly half an hour to load up as much coffee as she wants. She proceeds to an automatic checkout, but after scanning her second free bean, the machine stops.)

    Automatic Checkout: “If you have combined two of the same item, please combine them.”

    Customer: “D*** it!”

    Manager: “Oh, I’m sorry. These machines can be kind of picky. I’ll get that for you.”

    (He stacks the entire mound of bagged coffee beans onto a scale, weighs it, and then presents her with the now massively inflated price.)

    Customer: “I… hey! I’m not paying that much! Put them back.”

    Manager: “I’m sorry, I’m not permitted to return food to the shelves once it’s been handled.”

    (They argue, and finally the shopper gives up and pays for the beans—and the bags. After the customer leaves, my manager returns.)

    Me: “She paid!? We were all expecting her to throw them on the ground and run out!”

    (I was actually correct! When I left the store, I noticed dozens of bulk bags strewn around the parking lot!)

    Desperately Needs Change In His Life

    | USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Money

    (I work at an amusement park. They are very strict about the money, and I am the head cashier. It’s about 100 degrees out, and there’s a long line of about 100 people waiting to place an order. A customer rudely cuts everyone in line, and starts talking to me.)

    Rude Customer: “Hey bud, can you give me four quarters for a dollar?”

    Customer In Line: “Hey, I was in line!”

    Rude Customer: “Relax, I’ll only be a second.”

    (The customer ignores the rest of the customers complaints.)

    Me: “No, sir. I’m sorry; we’re not allowed to open the register.”

    Rude Customer: “Aw, come on man! I just need four quarters.”

    Me: “Well, if you want change, you can go to the customer service desk at the front of the park.”

    Rude Customer: “Are you f****** serious!? It’s 100 f****** degrees outside; I am not going to the other side of the d*** park, you a**-wipe!”

    Customer In Line: “Dude, no need to be a jack-a**. Plus, you cut in line anyways.”

    Rude Customer: “Mind your own business you old lady. Dude, seriously, give me my f****** change for a dollar!”

    (My manager overhears.)

    Manager: “What seems to be the problem here?”

    Rude Customer: “I need change for this f****** dollar, and your stupid-a** cashier won’t do it.”

    Manager: “I’m sorry, sir. We’re not allowed to make change for a dollar. You need to go to the front of the park and go to customer service. They’ll do i—”

    Rude Customer: “I was already f****** told that! And I already said, I am not walking all the f****** way over there!”

    Customer In Line #2: “Dude, shut the f*** up already! We’re waiting in line for food, and clearly you’re not getting your change!”

    Rude Customer: “Mind your own d*** business! I need it ’cause my girlfriend is on her f****** period!”

    Customer In Line #3: “Here’s a stupid quarter you a**-wipe!”

    (Customer In Line #3 proceeds to throw quarters at the customer who cut in line. The customer then proceeds to pick up the quarters. My manager bends over the counter and looks down at the man.)

    Manager: “You have 10 minutes to get your girlfriend her tampon, and out of my park, before I call security!”

    (The customers in line start clapping as he runs away, with no girlfriend in sight!)

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