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    Category: Money

    Stripped Of All Pretensions

    | NJ, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Money

    (My aunt sells antiques, mainly small things like Victorian era toys. She has just sold a stuffed bear for $70. The customer hands her 70 single dollar bills.)

    Aunt: *joking* “Singles? What, are you a stripper?”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    (After my aunt’s stunned silence, the girl and she started talking. The customer was really cool about it, and not embarrassed or upset by the comment. Apparently, thanks to her profession, she pretty much pays for everything with $1 bills!)

    Laptop Flop, Part 5

    | Finland | At The Checkout, Geeks Rule, Money, Technology

    (A customer walks in with a cheap supermarket-branded laptop. She insists it’s only a tiny problem, but it turns out to be a malware-ridden horror show with no anti-virus software installed at all. I spend over 30 minutes cleaning it up with the customer standing behind my back. I recommend installing an anti-virus package, which the customer refuses. She then picks up her machine, and tries to walk out.)

    Me: “Excuse me, aren’t you forgetting something?”

    Customer: “…Huh?”

    Me: “The service fee is 45 euros.”

    Customer: “Oh, come on! The computer was already expensive, and now this?!”

    Me: “I guess we couldn’t go on for long if we worked for free.”

    Customer: “But this is what you nerds do on your free time anyway!”

    Related:
    Laptop Flop, Part 4
    Laptop Flop, Part 3
    Laptop Flop, Part 2
    Laptop Flop

    This Train Is All Stops To The Edge Of Reason

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Money, Transportation

    (I’m going through the gate to the subway when I hear a woman talking to an attendant.)

    Woman #1: “I only have $2 of the regular $3 fare.”

    Attendant: *very amicably* “Don’t worry about it! Just go through.”

    (Later on the platform, I overhear this loud exchange between the same woman, Woman #1, and her friend, Woman #2.)

    Woman #1: “That’s what’s wrong with this city nowadays!”

    Woman #2: “What are you talking about?”

    Woman #1: “That idiot just let me pay $2 for a subway fare! TTC (our transit system) is always talking about how they don’t have any money, but he let me pay $2!”

    Woman #2: “The transit system is going to h***!”

    (I guess you really can’t make some people happy!)

    Not Part Of The 99 Per Cent

    | Glendale, AZ, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Money

    (I’m currently working the front checkout and a man walks up to purchase his items, I scan all the items and bag them.)

    Me: “That will be $19.86.”

    Customer: “That’s way too much. You must have scanned it wrong.”

    Me: “No, everything is there.”

    (I then show him the screen so he can see.)

    Customer: “That can’t be right. If that is $5.00, and that is $3.00—”

    Me: “But it isn’t. They are $5.99 and $3.99—”

    Customer: “Hold on! Let me show you.”

    (The customer gets a pen and paper from my checkout and starts adding it up.)

    Customer: “See, $5.00 plus $3.00 plus $7.00 equals $15.00. It’s showing up wrong.”

    Me: “But it is $5.99, $3.99 and $7.99. It makes a difference.”

    (By now, several other customers are waiting, so I pull out a calculator to show him.)

    Me: “$5.99 plus $3.99 plus $7.99 plus sales tax comes out to $19.86.”

    Customer: “Well, you NEVER mentioned SALES TAX!”

    (The customer pays for the items and leaves. I begin helping the next customer in line.)

    Next Customer: “Well, that was dumb.”

    This Is Soda-Pressing, Part 2

    | Staten Island, NY, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Money

    (I am standing in line when a customer comes up behind me with two boxes of about 20 cans of soda each.)

    Customer: “Can I go ahead of you?”

    Me: “You want to cut in line?”

    Customer: “No, I just need to talk to the woman in front of you!”

    (The customer in front of me doesn’t seem to know him. However ,he only has two items, and I have forgotten to grab oranges anyway, so I say sure and dash back to the produce section. When I return, I hear the tail end of their conversation.)

    Customer: “So if you let me put my soda on your bill, I can get a discount because you’re spending more than $20, and I’ll pay for the soda!”

    Customer In Front: “Okay, fine.”

    (The cashier finishes ringing the customer in front’s order, makes a note of the price, and scans the two boxes of soda. The customer in front of me pays her share, and then the cashier turns to the man with the soda, after carefully subtracting the customer in front’s cost from the total.)

    Cashier: “You owe $17.70.”

    Customer: “What? That’s ridiculous. It’s too much! I’m not paying that!”

    Cashier: “Are you kidding? You can’t do that.”

    Customer: “Just take it off!”

    Cashier: “You cut in line, held everybody up while you explained this, made a big fuss, and now you’re going to hold everybody up again while we call a manager to void this?”

    Customer: “F*** you! I didn’t do anything wrong.” *storms out*

    Related:
    This Is Soda-Pressing


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