Category: Money

Acting Bittersweet About The Sweets

| Serbia | Extra Stupid, Money, Theme Of The Month

(I was working as a promoter for a [Popular Brand] inside a supermarket telling people that they can buy certain items within the brand for a certain amount of money and then receive a gift at the front. I explain this to one woman.)

Customer: “Do dark chocolates count?”

Me: “Yes, they certainly do.”

Customer: “But they didn’t count last week.”

Me: “I wasn’t aware of that; I worked in a different store last week, but I assure you, you will receive your gift if you buy the dark chocolates.”

(The woman was still suspicious, so I showed her the list of products that I had in my hand.)

Customer: “What about the one for cooking?”

Me: “Yes, that one counts as well.”

Customer: “But they didn’t count last week!””

Me: “Again, I know nothing about that.”

(I show her my list again.)

Customer: “How much is it?”

Me: “I’m not sure. It’s around [price], but if you look over there, just a couple of meters away, you’ll see the exact price.”

Customer: “How do you not know the price? You work here.”

Me: “Actually, I don’t work in the supermarket. I don’t even work for [Popular Brand]. I work for a marketing agency that was hired by the brand. I work in different stores every week and the prices vary.”

Customer: “You know, I’m older and, therefore, wiser, so I’ll forgive you this time, but there are all sorts of idiots out there that are going to make a fuss about something as trivial as this. I would advise you to try and do your job a little better next time. But it’s okay.”

(She kissed me on the cheek, smiled a fake smile, and walked away without the chocolates.)

The Currency Of Understanding

, | Germany | Bizarre, Money, Tourists/Travel

(The year is 2010. The euro has been introduced as a common currency throughout Europe in 2002. An elderly lady approaches me, picks some items, and wants to pay.)

Me: “That is 28.50.”

Elderly Lady: “Oh, so little? Are you sure?”

(I notice her picking out some old Austrian schillings from her purse.)

Me: “I’m sorry. ma’am. You can’t pay with those here; this is outdated currency.”

Elderly Lady: “No, no! I have always paid with them!” *picks out some more* “Look, I have money!”

Me: “Lady, I’m sure you have enough, but… I simply cannot accept Austrian schillings. We have the EURO.”

Elderly Lady: “Yes, yes, I understand. You want deutschmarks? I don’t have any deutschmarks. Schillings, you take?”

Me: *suddenly understanding* “Yes, ma’am. That would be… 280 schillings, please.”

(I pack her things, she hands me 250 old Austrian schillings, but I go with it. She seems to have disappeared with her travel group, when a younger lady, also speaking Austrian dialect, turns up.)

Younger Lady: “Hey, there. Did my grandmother bother you?”

Me: “What grandmother? Do you mean…”

Younger Lady: “Yeah, my granny. Did she try to pay with schillings?”

Me: “In fact, she did. And I sold her something.”

Younger Lady: “Well, you shouldn’t have sold her anything. What’s her bill?”

Me: “28.50; but as I said, she already paid. I took her schillings. Maybe I can exchange them for something.”

Younger Lady: “No! Give them back to me. She’ll be mad about not having them! How much did you say?”

Me: “€28.50.”

Younger Lady: *hands me over two 20 Euro bills* “Keep it, for goodness’ sake!”

Me: “No way, ma’am. That’s far too much.”

Younger Lady: “Well, then give me 10 back.”

Me: “Fair enough; thank you.”

(The rest of the day, I wondered why my supply of ‘free’ coffee and food worked so fine. Later on, I realized that the young lady had left some money at every booth near mine because I was so friendly to her grandmother, who suffered from Alzheimer’s, which I didn’t realize immediately. Thank you, ladies, you were amazing!)

Two Can Whine For Ten Dollars

, | Peterborough, ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Money, Theme Of The Month

(I’m taking orders for front counter. A customer walks up and hands me one of our “2 can dine for $9.99″ coupons.)

Customer: “I’ll have this, please.”

Me: “No problem. Would you like to add anything else?”

Customer: “No, thank you. Just the two meals.”

Me: “All right, your total is $11.70.”

Customer: “How much is it after the coupon?”

Me: “That is the price with the coupon. You wanted to use the two can dine, right?”

Customer: “Yes, but why is it that price? The coupon says $10 on it.”

Me: “Oh, the $10 is the price before tax, so that makes the difference.”

Customer: “No, you’re supposed to take $10 off, that’s what the coupon means.”

Me: “Sorry, it doesn’t actually work like that. It means that you pay $10 for the two meals. They would normally be over $15 for both without the coupon.”

Customer: “But it says $10 here. So I only owe you the tax.”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry but the coupon isn’t for $10 off. You are still saving a good amount off the regular combo prices.”

Customer: “Fine. I don’t want it then. The idiots at [our other location] wouldn’t do it right either.”

(He stormed off muttering about how we were too dumb to honour our own coupon.)

I’m Not Even Here Right Now

| The Netherlands | At The Checkout, Money, Theme Of The Month

(I’ve just found the piece of underwear I was looking for, from the mall’s own brand. The closest check-out happens to be their shop-in-shop lingerie store, so I go there to let the cashier ring up my item.)

Cashier: “That’ll be [total]. Would you like to get a savings card?”

Me: “Perhaps. What does it get me?”

Cashier: “€5 off on your next purchase at [Lingerie Store], over €25 and up.”

Me: “Oh, no thanks. I never shop here.”

Cashier: *gives me a strange look*

Me: “I mean, I never shop for €25 here at [Lingerie Store].”

Cashier: “Oh…” *hands me the receipt* “Well, have a nice day, then.”

Sexy Money

| Sweden | At The Checkout, Language & Words, Money, Rude & Risque

(The Swedish word for the number six is ‘sex.’ The cashier is just about to charge an elderly couple for their groceries.)

Cashier: “That’s 106 kronor.”

(The old man hands him a 100 kronor bill.)

Cashier: “I need six kronor more.”

Old Man: *to cashier* “What did you say?”

Old Woman: “He said he wanted sex.”

Cashier: *getting red but trying to smile* “Six kronor more.”

Old Man: “What?”

Old Woman: *loudly* “He said he wants sex!”

(Both the queue behind them and the queue for the other register go silent and stare.)

Cashier: *loudly* “Kronor!”

Old Man: *loudly* “Speak up woman!”

Old Woman: *almost screaming* “THE CASHIER WANTS SEX FROM YOU!”

Cashier: *screaming* “SIX KRONOR!”

Page 22/142First...2021222324...Last