Category: Money

I’m Not Even Here Right Now

| The Netherlands | At The Checkout, Money, Theme Of The Month

(I’ve just found the piece of underwear I was looking for, from the mall’s own brand. The closest check-out happens to be their shop-in-shop lingerie store, so I go there to let the cashier ring up my item.)

Cashier: “That’ll be [total]. Would you like to get a savings card?”

Me: “Perhaps. What does it get me?”

Cashier: “€5 off on your next purchase at [Lingerie Store], over €25 and up.”

Me: “Oh, no thanks. I never shop here.”

Cashier: *gives me a strange look*

Me: “I mean, I never shop for €25 here at [Lingerie Store].”

Cashier: “Oh…” *hands me the receipt* “Well, have a nice day, then.”

Sexy Money

| Sweden | At The Checkout, Language & Words, Money, Rude & Risque

(The Swedish word for the number six is ‘sex.’ The cashier is just about to charge an elderly couple for their groceries.)

Cashier: “That’s 106 kronor.”

(The old man hands him a 100 kronor bill.)

Cashier: “I need six kronor more.”

Old Man: *to cashier* “What did you say?”

Old Woman: “He said he wanted sex.”

Cashier: *getting red but trying to smile* “Six kronor more.”

Old Man: “What?”

Old Woman: *loudly* “He said he wants sex!”

(Both the queue behind them and the queue for the other register go silent and stare.)

Cashier: *loudly* “Kronor!”

Old Man: *loudly* “Speak up woman!”

Old Woman: *almost screaming* “THE CASHIER WANTS SEX FROM YOU!”

Cashier: *screaming* “SIX KRONOR!”

Human Kindness Is A Simple Formula

| TX, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Money

(A couple with a small child comes up to my register with a WIC transaction, which goes through without a problem until…)

Me: “I am sorry but your formula didn’t go through.”

(The couple is buying nine containers of formula at around $18 each.)

Mother: What? Let me see.

(I show them the slip and the starting balance, which shows no formula was offered through the program.)

Father: “Great… and it’s Sunday so we can’t call them. Well, take off all but one and we’ll talk to them tomorrow.”

(I nod and take allow them to purchase just the one can of formula with the rest of their items.)

Me: “I’m sorry about that but h—”

(At this moment the next customers in line, both 20ish year old females cut in.)

Female #1: *handing me $20* “I’ll buy one of them.”

Mother: *shocked* “Y… you don’t have—”

Female #2: *doing the same* “We had parents that were just like you; please allow us to help.”

Mother: *nearly to tears* “N… no, please don’t.”

(Eventually, the pair got the mother to the accept the gifts, and when the pair was done with their regular purchases, I still couldn’t believe what happened and that there were still people who believed in the simple formula of human kindness!)

Their Logic Is Priceless

| Vancouver, BC, Canada | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Money, Theme Of The Month

(I work in a retail store that has deals where if you buy two of certain items, you get both at a discounted price. You cannot buy only one and get it at half the price.)

Customer: *shows me [Brand] body wash & [Brand] deodorant* “These are the same price and are on for the same ‘buy 2 for $4′ deal. It’ll still go through, right?”

Me: “We will find out once I scan them in.”

(I scan each item in individually and no deal shows up. So I ring each item in twice before having to call price check and sure enough, the deal comes off separately PER ITEM.)

Me: “Sir, it appears the deal is for each item individually. These two cannot be combined.”

Customer: “That’s ridiculous! They’re the same price and on for the same deal. I should be able to mix and match them!”

Me: “Unfortunately it doesn’t work that way, unless it’s a deal on the brand. And this time, it’s on the objects. You’d have to buy two deodorants or two body washes to get the deal.”

Customer: “But that’s ridiculous! THEY’RE THE SAME PRICE ON FOR THE SAME DEAL! Can’t you do anything about that?”

Me: “Sir, I cannot. The deal is on the items, and not the brand. If you’d like, I can ring you in for two of each and you can pick them up before you leave.”

Customer: “But if you have a deal on for chips, you can buy one ketchup and one BBQ and still get the deal! Why can’t I do that here?”

Me: “…because those are both chips. These are not the same item.”

Customer: “I get that… but they’re the same price!”

(This went on for a couple more minutes, him using the same logic. He didn’t end up buying the body wash or the deodorant. Moral of the story: you should be able to buy one yoghurt and one dish soap for a discounted price, providing they’re on for the same sale price.)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 33

| Sydney, NSW Australia | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money

(I am finalising a sale with a customer. We have store cards for customers, which give discounts and special offers.)

Me: “Do you have a VIP card?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Would you like one?”

Customer: “No, thanks.” *swipes credit card*

Me: “Sorry, but your card has been declined. Do you have another way of paying?”

Customer: “No. I’ll come back.” *stops for moment* “I think I will sign up for the store card.”

(I pass the form to her, fill in her details on the computer, and hand her the store discount card. She hands it straight back to me.)

Customer: “Use this to pay for my things.”

Me: “What? No, this isn’t a bank card. It’s a discount card.”

Customer: “I do not understand. You give me card. I pay for things with card.”

Me: “This is a store card for customers to get discounts and rewards with.”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “No, you can’t make payments with this card. Go to your bank about your credit card.”

Related:

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 32
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 31
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 30

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