Category: Money

Not In Concert With Her Purchases

| MA, USA | Extra Stupid, Money, Musical Mayhem

Customer: “What is this $295 charge from [Ticket Broker]?! I did not make that!”

Me: “I can help you with that. It says they were for Beyonce tickets. Do you remember making this charge?”

Customer: “No, I did not do that!”

Me: “Did you lose your card?”

Customer: “Yes, duh!”

Me: “When was the last time you used the card?”

Customer: “I don’t know… What has that got to do with anything?”

Me: “If you lost the card, the last charge you made would be the best place to start. When did you find out the card was lost?”

Customer: “Today.”

Me: “Okay, is the $400 ATM withdrawal yesterday yours?”

Customer: “Yes! That’s mine; that was the last time I had my card. I must have lost it after that.”

Me: “Well… the [Ticket Broker] charge was done two days before that. So the charge was done before you lost the card. Are you sure you did not buy Beyonce tickets?”

Customer: “Uh… I could have. Maybe I just forgot… Bye!”

Me: *thinking, how can one forget buying concert tickets three days ago?*

Will Find It Or Dime Trying

| NH, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Money

(I work in a grocery store. There are little trash cans between the register and the little counter with the card payment system. I’m giving the customer her change when a coin falls into the trash bucket. Most customers brush it off and leave.)

Me: “Oh, I’m so sorry. Let me get that for you” *find the dime and give it to her* “Well, have a nice day!”

Customer: “There should be another dime. I need my dime.”

Me: “Well, okay, let me look again.” *I look in the trash and around the ground* “Are you sure it wasn’t one dime,  ma’am?”

Customer: “No! Let me look.” *she then proceeds to pull out all the trash, tossing it onto my belt, then pouring out all the garbage*

Bagger: “What’s wrong?”

Me: “She lost her dime.”

(My bagger then starts searching the surrounding area for the dime.)

Customer: *stops after about 10 minutes of searching and looks straight at me* “Oh, well, it’s just a dime.” *she leaves*

Me: *to the next customer* “Hi, how are you today?”

(I’m laughing pretty hard by now, as I could barely keep from cracking up while watching this lady. I’m not even mad.)

Customer #2: “If she took any longer, I would’ve just given her a dollar!”

Pounding Out A Deal

| UK | At The Checkout, Money

(I work in a charity shop. Everything is very cheap but we also have an ‘everything £1′ rail for clothing with minor issues; small marks, loose buttons etc. or for clothing that’s been in the shop for a while. A customer comes to the counter with a few items from the £1 rail.)

Customer: “This has a mark. Look.”

(She points out a tiny black speck, like a dot from a pen.)

Me: “Yes, I see. It’s £1.”

Customer: “I don’t know if the mark will wash out.”

Me: “Okay…”

Customer: “Can I get a discount?”

Me: “It was on the £1 rail. It’s already discounted.”

Customer: “But it has a mark!”

Me: “Yes, that’s why it’s only £1.”

Customer: “Can’t you just take something off for the mark?”

Me: “Uh, no. It’s £1. That IS the discount.”

Customer: *sighing heavily* “Oh, all right, then. I’ll take it. I just hope it comes out.”

(The kicker? Her total was just £4, and she had to sort through a bunch of £20 notes in her purse until she found a £5 to pay with!)

A New Excuse To Have Baggage

| Grangemouth, Scotland, UK | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Money

(Recently, a new law has come in where all retailers have to charge 5p for a bag. This happens on the first day it becomes law.)

Me: “So, that’s £40 altogether…”

Customer: “Can I get a couple of bags?”

Me: “Yeah, that’ll be another ten pence. Is that okay?”

Customer: *suddenly angry* “No, that isn’t okay! Since when did you lot start charging for bloody bags?!”

(I do my best to not look at the various signs that have been around for a couple of months warning people of the date, doing my best to remain professional.)

Me: “Just today. The law became active today.”

Customer: “Bulls***! This is just another way for you lot to line your pockets!”

Me: “The money goes to charity, though. We don’t—”

Customer: “Save it! I’ll just go to another bloody shop that doesn’t have the f***ing cheek to charge for f***ing bags!”

(He storms off, leaving his shopping, as my manager, who was standing beside me just shrugs.)

Manager: “Where’s he gonna go, England?”

Has Been LED Astray

| NE, USA | Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

(I’m one of the managers at a video game store where we also buy other electronics, including TVs. We typically don’t pay a lot for LCD TVs because people bring them in all the time, and we have TONS in overstock due to this. I had just gotten a customer’s total figured out for their LCD TV…)

Me: “All right, you’re looking at [total] for your TV.”

Customer: “WHAT? I paid $150 for this TV. Why am I only gettin’ that much?”

Me: “Honestly, bud, people bring in LCD and LED TVs here so often that we have a lot of TVs that have just been collecting dust in our warehouse for months. Because of that, we haven’t been able to pay as much for TVs as we used to.”

Customer: “Well, my buddy’s got a plasma at home that he’s thinking about sellin’. How much you guys pay for that?”

Me: “Plasmas are a completely different story. We don’t see many of those, and they still have a lot of value on the market, so we’re able to pay way more for those.”

Customer: “Yeah, that makes sense, since you gotta refill ’em every year.”

Me: “Refill… What?”

Customer: “Yeah, my buddy was sayin’ that he had to have someone come out and refill the plasma in his TV a couple weeks ago. He said you gotta do that like once a year or they go bad.”

(I was so dumbstruck at this point that I couldn’t even begin to explain to him how wrong he was. He seriously believed this is how plasmas worked, too.)

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