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    Category: Money

    Mocking Beliefs Will Cost You

    | Vancouver, BC, Canada | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Money

    Customer: “Hey, how much is this?”

    (I don’t know the price either, but there is a haphazardly placed sign in front of the item that vaguely matches its description.)

    Me: *looking at sign* “I believe it’s $49.99.”

    Customer: “You BELIEVE? Can you go check the actual price?”

    Me: “Why certainly, sir.”

    (I grab the item and bring it to a cash register to scan it. It comes up as $89.99.)

    Me: “Okay, sir, I checked the price for you. It’s actually $89.99.”

    Customer: “What?! But that sign says $49.99!”

    Me: “But sir, you very obviously had doubts about this sign, because you asked me for the price.”

    Customer: “But you even said it was $49.99!”

    Me: “No sir, I said that I BELIEVED it to be $49.99. You didn’t like that answer, so I went to check the price like you’ve asked me to. All I’ve done was follow your directions.”

    Customer: “D*** it! Me and my big mouth!”

    (He still bought it, though. After all, isn’t the customer ‘always right’?)

    Don’t Do The Crime If You Can’t Tell The Time

    | TX, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Food & Drink, Money

    (My store has a grocery section, including an aisle of wine and beer. Since, in my state, alcohol cannot be sold before noon on Sundays, during that time the aisle is roped off. A customer comes up to my till at 10 on a Sunday, carrying bottles of wine.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I won’t be able to sell these to you before noon.”

    Customer: “What?! Why?”

    Me: “It’s state law. Alcohol can’t be sold before noon on Sundays.”

    Customer: “But I have to have these for a lunch party! It’s starting soon, and I said I’d bring the wine!”

    Me: “Again, I’m sorry, but I can’t sell these now. It’s illegal and my register will reject it if I try to ring it up.”

    Customer: “Don’t you understand? I NEED THESE. I will look like a FOOL if I show up at the party without any wine.”

    Me: “That’s… not really something I’m able to help with. I can’t break the law for that.”

    Customer: “What law? I just want you to sell me wine!”

    Me: “Texas state law forbids the sale of alcohol before noon on a Sunday. If you’d like, you can come back after noon and buy the wine then.”

    Customer: *suddenly calm* “Fine. I’ll come back later and pay for these then.”

    (She then picks up the bottles and starts walking towards the door with them. I call security.)

    Security: “Ma’am, you can’t take those without having paid for them.”

    Customer: “But she won’t let me pay for them!”

    Security: “Alcohol can’t be sold before noon. That doesn’t mean you get to walk out with it.”

    Customer: “But I was going to come back and pay for it later!”

    Can’t Go Without Within

    | Detroit, MI, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Money

    Caller: “Why did you send me a letter saying I have to pay my bill 31 days before it’s due?”

    Me: “Ma’am, that letter is simply stating that you have to pay the bill WITHIN 31 days of the due date.”

    Caller: “Yes! The letter says WITHIN 31 days! That means BEFORE!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I deal with accounts similar to yours all day every day, and I’m telling you, you have 31 days PAST the due date to pay the bill.”

    Caller: “That’s not what this letter says! I want you to send me a letter in writing stating what you just said.”

    Me: “Ma’am, if I sent you a letter stating what I just said you would receive the same letter you’re calling me about right now.”

    Caller: “Well, I’m going to send your company a letter to tell them I still haven’t received my bill for next month! I can’t afford not to have coverage!”

    Me: *finally giving up* “Would you like the address, ma’am?”

    The Price Of Not Listening

    | Yorkshire, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Money

    (I am working in a busy photo booth on a Saturday. A lady waves me over because she is struggling to use the photo machines.)

    Customer: “Hey, help me. This machine is saying that you can’t print out my photos for me.”

    (I check the machine. The limit for our one-hour printing service is 200 prints. If customers need more than 200, they have to choose the 24 hour service. However, I decide to be helpful.)

    Me: “Okay, the reason it won’t work for the one hour service is that you’re asking for 212 prints. That isn’t usually allowed, but since there’s no other pictures for me to print, I’ll put the order through. However, it will cost a lot more to get them all printed within the hour. Are you sure you don’t want to come back tomorrow?”

    Customer: “Yes, yes, I need them today.”

    Me: “That’s fine, but it will be almost twice the price—”

    Customer: “YES, that’s fine. I need them today!”

    (I process the order and she leaves. An hour later she returns for her pictures.)

    Me: “Here are your prints. Your total is [total].”

    Customer: “What? No it isn’t! That’s far more than I expected! It’s double the price! Why is it so expensive?”

    Me: *sighing inwardly* “The prints cost more if you select the one hour service.”

    Customer: “Well, nobody told me that. You should have told me it would cost more! This is ridiculous. I’m NEVER coming here AGAIN!”

    Discount Their Math Skills

    | Dayton, OH, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Money

    (My store is having a sale for 20-40% off. A customer comes in with a return, and she wants to purchase some more items as well. I try to run it as an exchange, knowing this will actually save her money.)

    Me: “Okay, after your store credit, you only owe $10.61.”

    Customer: “Wait, what are you doing? I wanted 30% off!”

    Me: “I realize that, ma’am, but actually, if you run this return as an exchange, you will actually pay less money than with the 30% off.”

    Customer: “No! I wanted my 30% off! Just let me return this and get my 30% off!”

    Me: “Okay, I can do that.”

    (I do the return and then ring up her purchases.)

    Customer: “Okay, your total with 30% off is $32.54.”

    Customer: “There! That’s better!”

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