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    Category: Money

    Bride Denied

    | Iowa City, IA, USA | Money, Spouses & Partners

    (Two women walk in.)

    Me: “Hi how can I help you?”

    Customer: “We’d like to return this dinnerware set. It comes from a registry so here that is also.”

    Me: “Okay. Is there anything wrong with it?”

    Customer: “No, we just decided we didn’t like the bride that much.”

    Stretched Pennies Stretch The Budget

    | North Carolina, USA | Food & Drink, Money

    (I work at the food court at a zoo. After one customer gives an order, their total comes to $10.26. They fish out a 10 dollar bill and a quarter, and continue to look for a penny.)

    Me: “Oh, that’ll be fine.”

    Customer: “You sure? I know I have a penny in here somewhere, I’d rather just give you that.”

    Me: “Oh, okay then.”

    (The customer pulls out a penny that has been in a Press A Penny machine, machines that we have around the zoo that flatten, shape, and add an animal imprint design to pennies.)

    Customer: “Here you are.”

    Me: “Well thank you, but you realize you can’t use this penny, right?”

    Customer: “What? Why not?”

    Me: “It’s not valid anymore. But really, it’s fine if you’re one cent short.”

    Customer: “It’s not about that! It’s about why you’re all too good for my money!”

    Me: “Okay, I’ll take it, but it’s not–”

    Customer: “Is it because I’m [ethnicity]?”

    Me: “No, ma’am!”

    Customer: “Then tell me what it is! The real reason!”

    Me: “Um…” *I look at the penny* “Oh! Yeah, this penny is valid. Sorry, I mistook it for something, uh, else.”

    Customer: “Thank you!” *walking off* “Some people these days!”

    The Cup Is Half Empty Kinda Guy

    | Norway | Liars & Scammers, Money

    (The chain we are a part of has a free coffee/warm beverage deal if you buy a cup with their brand, new each year of course. A customer comes to cash registry with smoking hot cup of warm coffee and a candy bar. The cup clearly states it is from 2005.)

    Me: “That’s [price] sir.”

    Customer: *shouting* “What?! For one lousy candy bar? Are you insane?”

    Me: “No sir, that’s for the candy bar, and for the hot beverage.”

    Customer: “This is a brand new cup! I bought it last week. Don’t try to rip me off!”

    (I point out the 2005 and he stares blankly at me for a second.)

    Customer: “But I have a gold card! I’m entitled to coffee all year long!”

    Me: “No, sir, you’re entitled to one cup. If you lose the cup, or fail to bring it, then you must pay for it.”

    Customer: “I shouldn’t have to pay for things that I buy!”

    Should Have Paid Attention In School

    | Illinois, USA | At The Checkout, Money

    (A customer places shoe boxes on the counter and stares at me.)

    Me: “All set then?”

    Customer: “Oh, yes. School.”

    Me: *slightly confused* “Uh, yeah! Yeah I can’t believe school is starting already!”

    Customer: *chuckles* “Heh… yeah. School.”

    Me: *more puzzled* “Yeah, I know. So soon!”

    Customer: “Where’s my 20% off?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am?”

    Customer: “Your website said if that if I said the word school in your store I get 20% off my purchase.”

    Me: “I don’t think you read correctly, ma’am. We don’t have any sort of sale like that going on.”

    Customer: “It says that if I say school I get a discount!”

    Me: “I think you were supposed to text school and get a coupon code sent to your phone.”

    Customer: “Well, school. Now give me my 20%.”

    Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, I just can’t do that. We’re not running that kind of sale.”

    Customer: “Well you should fix the internet, then! This is ridiculous!”

    Discount Discounted

    | Sherman Oaks, CA, USA | At The Checkout, Money

    Me: “And do you have a free rewards card with us, ma’am?”

    Customer: “A what? I don’t know. Maybe. I don’t know.”

    Me: “If you think you have one, I can look it up by your phone number?

    Customer: “My what?”

    Me: *louder* “Your phone number, ma’am.”

    Customer: “I don’t have one of those! I don’t think I have one! I don’t have a phone number! I don’t have one!”

    Me: “Okay, ma’am, that’s fine. Your total today is $26.74, and just to let you know, you could have saved $5.90 if you had the rewards card.”

    Customer: “A discount? My phone number is ***-****.”

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