November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Money

Good People Are Not Dime A Dozen

| London, England, UK | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Money, Movies & TV, Top

(I work in my university’s campus shop. I arrive for my shift to find the site in lockdown. There are security guys and people in ‘hi-vis’ jackets everywhere. They check my ID, and let me through, so I think nothing of it. Later that afternoon, one of the ‘hi-vis’ jacketed guys comes to my till with a drink and bar of chocolate. He looks stressed.)

Customer: “Hey, how much for this?”

Me: “£1.10”

(The customer starts rummaging in his pocket.)

Customer: “Oh for f***’s sake; I’ve gone and left my f****** wallet in the truck. I’ve been here since 4am, and this is the only break I’ll get! I’ve only got a £1 coin. Leave the chocolate; I’ll just have the drink.”

Me: “Nah, no worries; I’ll spot you the 10p. People leave their change behind all the time.”

Customer: “Are you sure?”

Me: “Yeah, positive. You look like you could use it. I hope your day gets a bit better!”

Customer: “Thanks, love! You put a smile back on my face. Bless you!”

(A couple of hours later, the same guy comes back in just as I’m closing up.)

Customer: “Are you closing?”

Me: “Yes, sorry, the till’s already been shut down.”

Customer: “Excellent! If you’ve got 10 minutes, go sit on the wall outside there, and keep quiet, okay?”

(Intrigued, I go sit where he asks, which is just outside the doors of the building. A dark SUV pulls up, and security guards materialise from nowhere and start moving people away. They try to move me on, but the customer tells them that I’m with him, and they leave us be. The next person to come out of the doors is Leonardo di Caprio, who then gets into the SUV. My mouth drops in shock.)

Customer: “10p for the front-row seat. Can’t say fairer than that, can you?”

(Some months later, I recognise one of my university’s lecture halls in the movie ‘Inception’!)

A Competitive Throwdown Of The Stock

| UK | Money, Theme Of The Month, Wild & Unruly

(An older customer is looking at the sweets.)

Old Customer: “How much is this bar of chocolate?”

Me: “That’s [amount].”

Old Customer: “Really? it is only [smaller amount] at [competitor].”

(The old customer puts the chocolate bar down, and picks up a packet of crisps.)

Old Customer: “How much are these?”

Me: “Those are [amount].”

(The old customer huffs and throws them down.)

Old Customer: “That is outrageous! They are only [smaller amount] at [competitor]!”

Me: “I am sorry, but because they are a large chain store, they can charge a little better than us. Because we are independent, our prices are a little higher.”

Old Customer: “You are just trying to rob an old lady! These are cheaper at [competitor]; you should be ashamed!”

(The old customer starts to throw the chocolates around.)

Me: “You’re more than welcome to shop there, ma’am. Please stop throwing those on the floor.”

Old Customer: “Why would I go there! It’s half way across town! You expect an old lady to walk all that way! You are a disgrace with no respect for your elders!”

(She starts to walk out of the shop.)

Old Customer: “You are robbers! Daylight robbers!”

(She leaves by throwing more stock on the floor.)

Law And Order: The Next Generation

| Australia | Family & Kids, Language & Words, Money, Top

(A customer approaches the counter with curtains in her hand. Her 15-year-old daughter hovers around.)

Me: “Hello, ma’am! Those curtains will be a total of $45, at $15 a piece.”

Customer: “What? No, the sign said $5 a piece.”

Me: “Really? I’m very sorry for the inconvenience, ma’am; I was told not to sell these specific curtains for any less than $15. We are a charity drive, so I hope you understand the pricing.”

Customer: “No, you don’t get it. These curtains were over there on that rack, and it said $5! You are bound, by law, to sell me these at this pri—”

(The daughter interrupts.)

Customer’s Daughter: “Actually, she’s not. The sign beside the curtains could have been referring to any number of things. That said, even if we were to assume that it referred to the curtains themselves, it would only constitute an invitation to treat, which is something very different to an offer. You know as well as I do that both an offer and an acceptance are needed to form a contract. By taking the curtains to the counter, you’re offering, and by disagreeing with an express term of the contract—in this case, the price—this lovely lady who’s merely performing her job is not accepting. Therefore, no contract has been formed.”

Customer: “I… I… shut up!”

(The customer storms out of the shop.)

Me: “Thank you!”

Customer’s Daughter: “No problem. I just finished a semester on contract law, and she’s done this in the past three stores we’ve gone to. I hope things look up for you!”

The Big Country Of Small Talk

| UK | At The Checkout, Geography, Money

(I work in a large retail clothing chain in the UK. The chain is actually an American brand, and popular in both countries. I am serving a customer at the till. I am always friendly to my customers, and always make small talk.)

Me: “Hello, sir, how was your day today?”

Customer: “Why do you want to know?”

Me: “I was just asking, sir; you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

Customer: “Quit the small talk. I don’t care what they tell you to say when I am here.”

Me: “I am sorry, sir; that comes to [total]. Would you like to pay cash or card, sir?”

Customer: “What’s with this ‘sir’ bull-s*** your giving me?! You should just stick to your job, and quit the small talk. No one wants to talk to you anyway!”

(He throws his money on the counter, even though I am holding my hand out. I say nothing, and collect his change. He continues to rant at me.)

Customer: “This is what is wrong with the world! People are becoming robots, and just saying things and not meaning them! It’s all fake smiles and stupid small talk!”

Me: “I do not get paid any more or any less for talking to you, sir; I was just being polite. I am sorry if I offended you in any way. Have a nice day.”

(The customer glares at me. His eyes go wide, and he starts to go red.)


Me: “Quite right, sir, we are in England as you correctly pointed out. However, you do realise that you have just spent money in this store, which happens to be an American company?”

(He opens his mouth to retaliate, but he can’t when he realises what I have just said. The line of customers behind him all start laughing at him, as he walks away rather briskly!)

To Give Credit Where It Is Due

| Lancaster, CA, USA | Health & Body, Money, Top

(A gym member comes to the front sales desk and speaks with my coworker.)

Member: “I received a notice in the mail that there was an issue with my monthly billing. Could you help me figure this out?”

Coworker: “No problem.”

(My coworker proceeds to look over the member’s record in the computer.)

Coworker: “Ma’am, it appears that the credit card on file is no longer valid. That has caused your payments to be rejected.”

Member: “I don’t understand how that’s possible. Is this the card you have on file?”

(The member hands my coworker her credit card.)

Coworker: “No, ma’am. We have a different card number on file. Did you recently receive a new card from your credit card company?”

Member: “Yes, this is it. I don’t understand why they always have to change the card number and screw up all my bills like this.”

Coworker: “I know it can be quite frustrating, but don’t worry. I will take care of this for you, and have you back to normal in no time.”

(My coworker enters her new card number into the computer, takes the member’s past due payment, and hands her a receipt. The member then gathers her belongings and exits the building. No more than two minutes later, I see the same member coming back to the front desk with her receipt in hand. From previous experience, I know that this generally means the customer is upset about what they see on the receipt, and wants to yell at us.)

Me: “Uh oh, she’s back; brace yourself.”

(The member walks up to my coworker, and I wait for her to begin complaining.)

Coworker: “Hello again, ma’am. Is there something else I can help you with?”

Member: “Oh no, dear. I was half way to my car, when I realized I forgot to say thank you for all your help. So thank you, and I am so sorry for my lack of manners.”

Coworker: “It was my pleasure, ma’am. Have a wonderful day.”

Me: *dumbfounded*