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    Category: Money

    Number Of The Beastly Coincidences

    | Uckfield, England, UK | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Holidays, Money

    (I work in a small corner shop. It is Halloween and we’ve been busy on-and-off with kids making their way around the estate and trick-or-treating, and coming in to buy drinks. I’m approached by a kid I estimate to be in his early teens.)

    Me: “Hey, kiddo! Having fun?”

    Kid: “Yeah, not a bad haul so far. Just a bit thirsty; nobody hands out drinks!”

    Me: “No, I suppose they’re bulkier and more expensive, too.”

    Kid: “Yeah you’re probably right and th—” *sees the total on my screen* “Aww £6.67? Come ON! Could you give me a penny discount?”

    Me: “Er….

    Kid: “Guess my maths isn’t as good as I thought. I wanted it to be £6.66 for Halloween!”

    Me: “Well, I’m not authorised to give discount unless the items are damaged but [Similar Drinks] are a penny cheaper so you could swap out one of your [Original Items] if it really bothers you that much?”

    Kid: “Yes, please! One sec while I take this back and swap it!”

    (By this point there’s a small queue and the boy’s friends, who are waiting outside and clearly can’t hear what he’s doing but see him sprint back to the fridges, yell through the door for him to hurry up.)

    Me: “Okay, buddy! That’s now £6.66.”

    Kid: “Thanks! Can I get a receipt?”

    Me: “Sure, have a good Halloween!”

    (As the kid approaches the door he starts waving his receipt at his friends.)

    Kid: “Guys! GUYS! LOOK! Weirdest coincidence ever! I just grabbed some random drinks and the total was £6.66. How spooky is that?!”

    (The customer behind him turned to me and just raised her eyebrows!)

    Praying The Layaway Away

    | Taylor, MI, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Extra Stupid, Money

    (I work in a layaway service that has the option to cancel your layaway anytime you want.)

    Customer: “Hi, I just need to do a couple things today. I want to make a regular payment on one and pay the other one off.”

    Me: “Okay, I just need to see your ID. Do you want to do the payment first?”

    Customer: “I want to cancel one and take both out.”

    Me: *thinking I misheard* “Oh, sorry. I thought you wanted to make a payment and pay one off.”

    Customer: “No. I’m not making a payment, but I’m taking both out.”

    Me: “…I’m sorry? So you don’t want to cancel?”

    Customer: “No, I do want to cancel one! I want them both right now though!”

    Me: “So, you want me to take the one layaway out so you can buy it up front?”

    Customer: “No, what? I want my things, but I want my refund, too.”

    Me: “… Ma’am, if I’m hearing you right, I can’t give you your items if you don’t pay for it. You need to pay it off first.”

    Customer: “No one would have to know though, right? Just put it through as a refund and give me my stuff and my money. You’re going to be taking it out anyway. It’s easy.”

    Me: “… I can’t do that. That would be stealing.”

    Customer: “But I picked out the stuff myself! Whatever. I’ll come back later when someone actually WANTS to help me. You get confused too easy!”

    (She then walked off. Turned out she did try to come back and ask for a ‘refund,’ but was quickly taken care of by security when she began to throw a fit over ‘poor service!’)

    Not The Most Gifted

    | ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

    Me: “Yes, the iPads are on sale right now, and you get a $40 gift card with them as well.”

    Customer: “What do I do with that?”

    Me: “Um, you buy things with it.”

    Customer: “Oh, ya?”

    Making An Amendment To The Amendment

    | SC, USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Politics

    (A customer has called in to complain about being assessed a paper statement fee, which we recently implemented. I explained to her multiple times how to enroll in online statements in order to waive the fee, which she feels she shouldn’t have to do.)

    Customer: “I shouldn’t have to do that. This is my money and it is unconstitutional to charge these fees.”

    Me: “Ma’am, these fees are not unconstitutional. We have a team of lawyers who check all of our policies and fees before they are implemented specifically for legality.”

    Customer: “I’m telling you. These fees are unconstitutional and violate my Second Amendment rights!”

    Me: “Ma’am, you do realize that the Second Amendment allows you the right to bear arms and own a gun, don’t you?”

    (Pause…)

    Customer: “Well these fees are still unconstitutional. And wrong. I want to speak to a supervisor!”

    A Thought For Your Pennies

    | IL, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Math & Science, Money

    (I’m a pharmacy tech working the drive thru. An older customer pulls up, and we go through getting her prescriptions.)

    Me: “Okay, your total will be $67.29.”

    Customer: “Okay.”

    (I go and grab her prescriptions from our waiting bin and come back to finish the transaction.)

    Customer: “Was that $68?”

    Me: “$67.29.”

    Customer: “$67.34?”

    Me: *now trying to not laugh* “$67.29″

    Customer: “Oh, 29.”

    (I looked back at my pharmacist and he’s trying to not crack up while in view of the customer. I finish the transaction and close the window.)

    Pharmacist: “Where on earth did she get 34 from?!”

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