November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Math & Science

Everyone needs basic math and science skills to survive. However, these customers were definitely sleeping their way through class!

An Argonizing Encounter

| London, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Math & Science

Cashier: “Did you find everything you needed?”

Customer: “No. I was hoping you could help me, actually. I’m looking for a shampoo. I can’t remember the name but it has argon in it.”

Cashier: “Argon, madam?”

Customer: “Yes that’s right, argon.”

Cashier: “Oh! You must mean argan oil. I can show you…”

Customer: “No, no! I don’t want oil in my hair! I said ARGON.”

Cashier: “But madam, shampoo doesn’t contain—”

Customer: “Do you even know what argon is?”

Cashier: “Yes, madam. It’s a gas. Sometimes used in lightbulbs. I don’t think it’s used in shampoo, though.”

Customer: “You really don’t know what you’re talking about, do you? Just because it’s a gas doesn’t mean it can’t be mixed. Water has oxygen in it, you know!”

Me: “Excuse me, madam, but I’m in a hurry and if you’re looking for argon compounds you’re going to be here a very long time.”

Customer: “What do you know, exactly?”

Me: “I know that argon is a noble gas so you’re very unlikely to find any compounds of it in this shop.”

Customer: *scoffs* “It’s not that hard to get hold of it! They just use recycled lightbulbs.”

Me: “Noble doesn’t mean rare. The stuff’s over 20 times more common than carbon dioxide. It means it’s almost completely unreactive. To get a compound you could mix into a shampoo, you’d need a very high-tech lab and a lot more money than anyone would pay for shampoo.”

Customer: “Fine! I’ll go somewhere they know what they’re talking about!” *storms out*

Me: “Yeah, good luck with that.”

Cashier: “Um… yeah. Thanks for that”

His Knowledge Of Science Blows

| WI, USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science

(Due to the weather, I am calling people who had pre-registered to come to watch the Geminid Meteor Shower at the nature center. One of the gentlemen tries to be optimistic about it.)

Gentleman: “What if we got enough people together and had them blow all at once to get rid of the clouds?”

Me: “Well, I’d hate to have someone pass out from all the blowing.”

Fractional Intelligence, Part 3

| USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Math & Science

(I work in the call center for the complaint line of a fast food restaurant chain.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Guest: “I just bought one of your burgers. The 1/3 lb burger. That’s your big burger, right?”

Me: “Well, we have 1/4 lb, 1/3 lb, and 1/2 lb burgers.”

Guest: “Right. But I got the 1/3 lb burger. That’s the biggest one, right?”

Me: “Um, no ma’am, the 1/2 lb is burger than the 1/3 lb.”

Guest: “Really? Are you sure?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. 1/2 is bigger than 1/3.”

Guest: “Huh. Never mind, then.”

(Guest hangs up.)

Me: *to coworker* “Wow. Another child left behind…”

Fractional Intelligence, Part 2
Fractional Intelligence

Give It More Than Half A Thought

| Aberystwyth, Wales, UK | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Math & Science

(I work in a small corner shop in my university town. I was serving behind the till when a man came up with bin bags, that I wasn’t aware were on a special offer until I scanned them through the till. The following conversation took place when I realised this.)

Me: “Oh, sir, these bin bags are two for £1.20. Would you like to take another?’

Customer: “No. You see, I need double strength bags for heavy duty waste, so I only buy ten, because if I bought twenty they’d only be half strength.”

Guessing Abhors A Vacuum

| Aarhus, Denmark | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Math & Science

(I’m working the register and we just got some new fruit that isn’t written on the paper so I call my coworker over to help find the number.)

Me: “Sorry, sir, it’s just going to be a minute. I need my coworker to find the number for these fruits as I don’t have it yet.”

Customer: “Can’t you just guess?”

Me: “I really don’t think that will work”

Customer: “Come on, just try.”

Me: “Oh, hey, it did work!”

(Customer looks pleased and gets ready to pay.)

Me: “Guess you just bought a vacuum cleaner for 249.99.”

Customer: Oh…”