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  • Category: Math & Science

    Everyone needs basic math and science skills to survive. However, these customers were definitely sleeping their way through class!

    Lucky Dollar Thirteen

    | OH, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Math & Science

    (It is my first day working the cash register, and everything is going well. A customer approaches my register with a handful of items. At first, she can’t figure out which items she wishes to use for which promotions, constantly changing her mind. Then she wants to use multiple (expired) coupons on her purchase. I call my coworker over to help explain to the customer how the promotions and coupons work. We finally get her straightened out on the promotions, and then this exchange happens.)

    Customer: “Okay, I think I got it. Now, with this coupon I get one item free, right?”

    Me:” Yes, ma’am, one item up to $13.”

    Customer: “Okay, well, these items here are about $13 total. Can I use those?”

    Me: “No, ma’am, the coupon is for one item up to $13.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay. I’d like to use this item, then.”

    (She places her coupon on a $14 item.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but you can’t use the coupon to get that item free; it’s $14.”

    Customer: “But, you said $13.”

    Coworker: “Yes, up to $13, but that is $14.”

    Customer: “But, you said $13.”

    Coworker: “Yes, up to $13. THAT’S $14.”

    Customer: “But… didn’t you say $13?”

    Coworker:  Yes, the coupon is up to $13. That item is $14.”

    (This continues back and forth for nearly a minute.)

    Customer: “OH! You mean INCLUDING $13!”

    Coworker: “Yes?”

    Customer: “Well, the coupon should say that. I’ll find another item.”

    (The customer goes to get another item– We still don’t know if she understood a word we said. Since we don’t know how long the customer is going to take, I invite the next customer in line to come to the register.)

    Next Customer: *sets her items on the counter with a gracious smile* “I have four items and no coupons.”

    Me: “I am so sorry for your wait, ma’am…”

    Drive (Thru) The Price Up

    | TX, USA | Food & Drink, Math & Science, Money

    (For my drive-thru customers, I try to give them the price from memory. Also, some of our customers try to be funny by being outraged at our prices.)

    Me: “That’ll be [price].”

    Customer: “How much?!”

    (As I’m getting his items, I notice that one of them costs slightly more than I remembered.)

    Me: “It’s [correct, slightly higher price].”

    Customer: “D***, I should have kept my mouth shut!”

    No Helium For The Airhead, Part 2

    | TX, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Math & Science

    (Because of a helium shortage, we currently have a limited amount of tanks to use on balloon orders. We run out in the middle of a day that has a special event going on.)

    Store Owner: “I’m sorry to say we can’t fill any more balloons unless it’s with air. If you want any helium balloons, you will have to go to [other store known for its poor service].”

    Customer: “That’s ridiculous! I need 20 balloons and you’re telling me I can’t have them now?”

    Store Owner: “I’ve called in for more tanks, but I won’t have them in before tomorrow, so if you need them you’ll have to go elsewhere.”

    Customer: “That’s ridiculous! You should have planned better and ordered more tanks to begin with.”

    Me: “We could try that, but we’re only given four tanks a week. Hospitals have a priority on helium for their machines, so their demands come first.”

    Customer: “If the hospital needs helium so badly, why don’t they make their own?”

    Me: “Helium isn’t man-made. That’s why.”

    Customer: *scoffs* “Yes, it is. How else do you think they put it in those tanks?”

    Store Owner: “They trap it when they mine, but—”

    Customer: “That is the dumbest thing I’ve heard. I can’t believe you idiots believe that shortage crap. I’m going to [other store]. I bet they won’t make up crap to get out of work!” *storms out*

    Store Owner: “I bet he also thinks H2O is an energy drink.”

    Related:
    No Helium For The Airhead

    The True Appliance Of Science

    | Indianapolis, IN, USA | Awesome Customers, Math & Science, Top

    (I volunteer at a children’s museum in their dinosaur area, where I work in the lab. We work behind a glass window that we keep open so the kids can ask us questions about the bones we are cleaning.)

    Every Kid: *completely ignoring me* “Wow! A real dinosaur bone!”

    One Awesome Kid: *staring directly at me* “Wow! A real scientist!”

    Hot On The Cent

    | Rio Grande, NJ, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Math & Science

    (We sell candy 10 for 1$, which equals 10 cents each. A lady walks up with her husband and child. I start ringing them up and the customer tosses a bag of candy onto my register.)

    Customer: “I do not know how many is in there.”

    Me: “Okay, I will finish ringing your items and count these last.”

    Customer: “Good.”

    (I am just about done when I dump out the bag of candy and start counting.)

    Me: “Okay, you have 34 pieces of candy which will be 3 dollars and 40 cents for the candy.”

    Customer: “Wait, it said 10 for a dollar. Should i go get more?”

    Me: “That is entirely up to you as they are still 10 cents for a piece of candy.”

    Customer: “But it says 10 for a dollar. I WANT THAT PRICE!”

    Me: “Ma’am, you are getting that price. It’s 10 cents for a piece of candy.”

    Customer: “BUT I WANT 10 FOR A DOLLAR!”

    Me: “Ma’am, what is 100 divided my 10?”

    Customer: “10, you stupid girl.”

    Me: “Okay. Well a dollar is 100 pennies and its ten pieces of candy for one dollar. Each piece of candy will be 10 cents. Therefore, you are getting the sale price.”

    (She then started screaming at me for making her seem like an idiot in front of her family. She then threw her credit card at me and stormed out of the store. Her husband stayed behind to apologize and say thank you for putting up with her.)

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