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  • A Caffeinated Christmas Miracle
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  • Category: Math & Science

    Everyone needs basic math and science skills to survive. However, these customers were definitely sleeping their way through class!

    Long-Handed Short-Change

    | UK | At The Checkout, Math & Science, Money

    (I have been working for almost 14 hours straight, and have had several difficult customers throughout the day. A customer approaches the counter and places a 4-pack of beer on the counter. I scan it through.)

    Me: “Okay, that will be £5.54, please.”

    (The customer hands over £10.)

    Me: “Okay, so that’s £4.46 change.”

    Customer: “Thank you. Oh wait, this is on offer. It’s only meant to be £4.49.”

    (I check the shelf, and it is indeed meant to be £4.49.)

    Me: “Sorry about that, I’ll just refund your money then charge through the correct price.”

    (I do this. The man now has 2 piles of money. One of £5.54, and one of £4.46. A total of £10. I take £4.49 from the £5.54 pile and put it in the till. This leaves him with £5.51 in two piles. One pile of £4.46 and the other of £1.05.)

    Customer: “Is that us straight now?”

    Me: “Yes. Were fine.”

    Customer: “No! That money there is yours!” *points at the £1.05* “It needs to go in your till. Then you need to give me £1.05 from the till.”

    Me: “Erm… what?”

    Customer: “You’ve f***** up! That money is yours. Put it in the till then give me an extra £1.05!”

    Me: “You want me to put £1.05 in the till. Then take £1.05 out of the till?”

    Customer: “Yes that’s your money.” *points at the £1.05 on the counter* “Put it in the till, then give me £1.05.”

    Me: “Erm… okay?”

    (I do this and the man leaves the shop. I turn to look at my supervisor, who has tears of laughter streaming down his face.)

    Inching Away From Intelligence, Part 2

    | Onley, VA, USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science

    (I work in the electronics department of a large retail store. I receive a phone call one morning.)

    Me: “Hello? Electronics department, how can I help you?”

    Caller: “Well, I’m on your website looking at your [brand name] TVs. You got two on here I like, a 26 inch and a 32 inch. What’s the difference?”

    Me: “Well, sir. It depends. Are they Plasma, LCD, LED?”

    Customer: *cutting me off* “No, no, no! I don’t care about any of that. I just wanna know which one’s bigger!”

    Related:
    Inching Away From Intelligence

    Weekly Roundup: Weird Science

    | Not Always Right | Math & Science, Roundups

    Weird Science! In this week’s roundup, we feature customers with a weird (or non-existent) comprehension of science!

    1. The Building Block(heads) Of Life (5,628 thumbs up)
      A brainless bookstore customer gets a crash course in Chemistry 101!
    2. Magnetic Lines Of Farce (3,127 thumbs up)
      This credit card customer doesn’t quite understand the “attraction” of magnetic stripes.
    3. A Heated Topic (3,870 thumbs up)
      A restaurant patron gets into a heated argument with an employee over the warmth of the sun!
    4. Science, Stripped Down To A Soundbite (2,031 thumbs up)
      Explaining condensation and temperature? It’s wasted on customers who just want a “watered”-down explanation.
    5. Can’t Keep A Good Waitress Down (4,038 thumbs up)
      A waitress gets a tip for giving a customer tips on gravity!

    PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

    PS #2: Read more roundups here!

    Having A Sub-epiphany

    | Montreal, QC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Math & Science

    (I’m standing in line behind a very well-dressed, mid-fifties lady.)

    Lady: “What’s the difference between a 6-inch sub and a 12-inch sub?”

    Employee: *shows a 12-inch bread* “Well, this is a 12-inch sub…”

    (She then moves her hand to the middle of the bread.)

    Employee: “…and this is the size of a 6-inch sub.”

    (The lady acts like if she has just found out the meaning of life.)

    Lady: “Oh, so a 6-inch is around half the size of a 12-inch sub!”

    Don’t Count Out The Cost Of Education

    | Gainesville, Florida, USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science

    (I’m the specialist for the children’s books. A customer comes up and asks me to take her to a popular kids’ series, so I do.)

    Customer: “Now, my granddaughter has numbers 1 and 2.”

    Me: “Great. We have the rest of the series if you’d like to pick up a few more.”

    Customer: “But what should I get?” *spreads her hands helplessly* ”She has 1 and 2 already, what should I get next?”

    Me: “You could get 3.”

    (The customer stands there blankly while I point to the book. She doesn’t move or react until I physically pick it up and put it in her hand.)

    Customer: “And then… should I go down to 4?”

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