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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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    Category: Love/Romance

    Customers sometimes bring their love lives (or lack thereof) with them–for better or worse. PS: be sure to visit Not Always Romantic for more love/romantic stories!

    Seoul Much For That Brilliant Idea

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Hotels & Lodging, Love/Romance, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I am a caucasian female working as a concierge in a hotel in Chicago, but I grew up in Korea. This particular group of guests has been causing havoc their entire stay, stealing items and bothering other patrons in the halls. One night, the television in the lounge has been smashed, so my boss calls the police on them. They are sitting on the sofa while the officer is trying to get their details. Before every answer, the guests converse amongst themselves in Korean.)

    Officer: “Where are you boys from?”

    Guest #1: *in Korean* “Tell him we’re from Japan!”

    Guest #2: “Uh, Japan. Yeah.”

    Me: *in perfect Korean* “You guys better tell him the truth. He’s going to find out anyway.”

    (They are in shock. But before they sputter out an excuse, the policeman says…)

    Officer: *in perfect Korean* “That’s okay. We’ll get it from their passports.”

    (And that was how I met my now fiancé. The guests, by the way, spent the rest of the night at HIS workplace instead of mine.)

    In Her Own Inbred World

    | Glen Rock, NJ, USA | Bizarre, Love/Romance

    (I have a tattoo in memory of my cousin who passed away. We were really close. I always get people asking me about it, but this one is by far the worst.)

    Me: “Have a nice day!”

    Customer: *grabs my wrist and looks at my tattoo* “Who’s Johnny?”

    Me: “He’s my cousin.”

    Customer: “Oh! I wanted to marry my cousin once. I was in love with him.”

    Me: “Oh…well…it’s not like that.”

    Customer: “It’s okay, because he’s my second cousin.”

    Me: “It’s not like that. My cousin passed away. I got this tattoo to remember him. I’m not in love with him.”

    Customer: “Oh, that’s nice. I should have married my cousin…” *walks away*

    Curtains Up For This Kitty

    | CA, USA | Love/Romance

    (I’m on the phone with a caller and assisting with her ticket purchase for a future visit.)

    Me: “Okay, so did you say you needed two senior tickets?”

    Caller: “Oh, no…it’ll be one adult and one senior. My boyfriend is younger than me. I’m a cougar. RAWR!”

    Please Don’t Single Me Out

    | Albuquerque, NM, USA | Crazy Requests, Love/Romance, Wild & Unruly

    (I’m a Caucasian male with very curly hair in my early 20s on a register. A Native American female in her mid to late 40′s comes up behind me.)

    Customer: “Oh, I love curly hair!”

    (She runs her fingers through my hair with a huge smile on her face.)

    Me: *feeling uncomfortable* “Uh…”

    Customer: “When do you get off?”

    Me: “Um, well I—”

    Customer: “I just love curly hair. It’s so cute! I just love it. My ex-boyfriend only had straight hair, but yours is so much better.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I really don’t think this is appro—”

    Customer: “Are you single?”

    (I press a code on my register for manager assistance.)

    Me: “I’m flattered and all, but I’m sorry, I’m just not that interested. Sorry. I hope you have a wonderful evening, though.”

    (Her smile changes to a scowl and she starts poking me in the shoulder angrily.)

    Customer: *pokes me repeatedly* “What!? Why not!? Is it because of my skin color!? What do you have against native chicks, huh!?”

    Me: “Not at all, ma’am, really! My first girlfriend was a native woman. I don’t understand why you’re doing this, and I don’t appreciate being treated this way.”

    Customer: “Oh, that’s bulls***! You are all alike! You’re just a white, racist, piece of s***! I’m going to get you fired, a**hole! You’ve insulted me and you took my joy away!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’ve called for a manager.”

    (She continues this profanity-laden tirade while the manager walks up.)

    Manager: “What’s the problem, ma’am?”

    Customer: “Your cashier insulted me!”

    Manager: “Alright, ma’am, what did he say to you?”

    (I’m a bit nervous, to be honest. I’ve never received a customer complaint before.)

    Customer: “He won’t go out with me! You’re the manager! Tell him to go out with me, or he’s fired! Can’t you understand?!”

    Manager: “If you come in here and hit on our employees or customers one more time, you will be banned from the store. Get out, now, or I will call the police!”

    Customer: *glares at me as she storms off*

    Manager: *to me, jokingly* “So, how do you like your new girlfriend?”

    (Apparently, this woman had come in several times and would aggressively flirt with white male customers and employees. So much so, that the manager staff were notified to be on the lookout for her!)

    My Butter Half

    | Minnesota, USA | Food & Drink, Love/Romance, Top

    (A couple approaches me at the movie theater’s concession stand.)

    Me: “Hi, what can I—”

    Customer: “Give me a green tea.”

    Me: “Sorry, we don’t have green tea.”

    Customer: “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Well, fine! What DO you have?”

    (I point right behind me where all our sodas are clearly listed.)

    Customer: “Well, FINE! Give me a Diet Coke, then.”

    Customer Husband: “…And a large popcorn, please!”

    Me: “Sure! That all?”

    Customer Husband: “Yep!”

    Me: “Cool. You guys want butter on the popcorn?”

    Customer Husband: *giant smile* “Ye—”

    Customer: “Of course not! Unlike you, I have a figure to maintain! I can’t have BUTTER on my popcorn! Really, are you an idiot?!”

    (I go to get them their popcorn, but I purposely put way too much butter in the bucket and shovel a thin layer of popcorn on top to hide the butter.)

    Me: “Here you go!”

    Customer: “Well, finally!”

    Customer Husband: *whispers as his wife turns away* “Butter?”

    Me: “Yes, sir.”

    (The guy hands me a five dollar bill. To this day, my coworkers and I refer to him as ‘Butter Man.’)

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