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    Category: Love/Romance

    Customers sometimes bring their love lives (or lack thereof) with them–for better or worse. PS: be sure to visit Not Always Romantic for more love/romantic stories!

    He Is Out-Dated

    | Scotland, UK | Love/Romance, Rude & Risque

    (I work in a call centre for a bank, and one of the security questions we use to verify cardholder identity is a memorable date. Some people try to get clever with you. I generally give them no reaction at all and just ask a different security question.)

    Me: “Can I ask you to confirm your memorable date there for me sir?”

    Customer: “Ah yes, June 9th, 1979. I met this lovely blonde woman in a bar in Soho, absolutely beautiful. She drank cocktails and we went back to mine and the things she could do kiddo, you could only imag—oh wait memorable date? Oh s***, I thought you meant…”

    Me: “Ha, that’s alright, sir; do you have it there?”

    Customer: “What’s your memorable date? You sound nice; you must have one.”

    Me: “My boyfriend surprised me with a trip to Paris for my birthday last year. That was pretty memorable I guess.”

    Customer: “Jeez, your generation sucks. Paris!? You can’t beat a roll in the hay in the back of a third hand car in Charing Cross. I’d show you that!”

    Me: “Okaaaaaaay anyway, moving on.”

    DOMArry The One You Love

    | New York, USA | Awesome Customers, Bigotry, Love/Romance, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (A co-worker and I are out to lunch on the weekend with our boss. We’re all really good friends and we are chatting with each other when we notice one of the waiters, who is thin and short, getting harassed by a group of teens.)

    Rude Teen #1: “Haha, look at [waiter] f*** up like he always does!”

    Rude Teen #2: “Ha! D*** f****t!”

    (The waiter is doing a good job ignoring the rude teens, but it’s very obvious he’s feeling upset. He’s walking towards us when one of the teens trips the waiter. He falls face first into the food he is carrying.)

    Rude Teen #1: *laughs hysterically* “Oops, don’t fall!”

    (The waiter gets up and wipes his face off, but it’s very obvious that he is crying. Having been bullied myself for being gay and being appalled at what’s going on, I stand up and approach the table. Note, I’m 6’3″ and very strong. I stand in between the tables the kids are at and the waiter.)

    Me: “Do we have a problem here?”

    Rude Teen #2: “Mind your own business, man!”

    Rude Teen #1: “Yeah, f*** off! This kid is a f****t anyways!”

    Me: “I suggest you stop right now, or else…” *I push up my sleeve and flex* “…you all and I are going to have a problem.”

    (The two teens slink down into their seats, and I walk the waiter over to his co-workers.)

    Me: *to the waiter* “Hey, if anybody ever tries to harass you or hurt you again, call this number. I know what’s like for being bullied because you’re gay. Just remember: I’m here to help you.”

    (I give the waiter my phone number. He hugs me and starts crying on my shoulder. While he is, the manager of the store comes by, and I explain the situation to him and point out the two teenagers. After the whole ordeal is done, the manager and the waiter come over to our table and give me a $100 gift card for helping them out. I tell them they don’t have to reward me for being a decent human being, but they keep continuing to offer it. Later that night I get a phone call from that waiter, but it wasn’t about being bullied. Eleven months later, I’m now engaged to the waiter I protected that day.)

    Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 6

    | Oahu, HI, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Love/Romance

    (My boyfriend and I are going shopping for my brother’s seventh birthday. A middle age customer walks up to us.)

    Customer: “Aww, isn’t that cute?”

    Me: “What is?”

    Customer: “Brother and sister shopping together. You both look like twins!”

    (My boyfriend laughs.)

    Me: “Sorry, but we aren’t related at all. We’re dating; you know, boyfriend and girlfriend.”

    Customer: “No, you’re not! You haven’t held hands or hugged each other. Show me!”

    Boyfriend: “Well, let’s not keep her waiting…”

    (I give him a kiss, which throws the customer into a rage.)

    Customer: “HAS THE WORLD GONE MAD?! THAT IS INCEST!”

    Related:
    From NotAlwaysRelated.com
    Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 5
    From NotAlwaysRomantic.com
    Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 4
    Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 3
    Putting The Relation Into Relationship, Part 2

    Checking Her Out At The Checkout Just Checked Out

    | LA, USA | At The Checkout, Love/Romance, Top

    (My boyfriend is visiting me at work. He’s currently at the back of the store, looking at our soft drinks. I am ringing up a customer’s items.)

    Me: “Is this all you need, sir?”

    Customer: “No, I need your digits so we can go out sometime.”

    Me: “Not happening. Your total is $15.86, sir.”

    (He pays but he doesn’t leave. My boyfriend walks up to the counter with his drink. The customer nudges him with an elbow, and starts talking to him.)

    Customer: “What sort of guy do you think she goes for?”

    Boyfriend: “Well, she wants a guy who is smart, charming, witty, and funny in an off-beat kind of way.”

    (I am grinning as I nod.)

    Me: “Yep. He’d have to be 5’9; muscular but not beefy. He’d need hazel eyes, a light olive complexion, black hair, and a cheeky grin.”

    (My boyfriend smirks and the customer frowns.)

    Customer: “It sounds like she just described you.”

    Boyfriend: “That’s because she was describing me. She’s my girlfriend.”

    Customer: “Oh! I meant no harm, man!”

    (The customer runs out of the store with his bag, and we both start laughing.)

    Me: “You should visit me at work more often.”

    His Magnetic Personality Won The Day

    | Boston, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Bigotry, Health & Body, Love/Romance, Top

    (I am an African-American male. When I was 13, I was in a car accident that has left me with a little bit of a limp since. I have two metal rods in my leg from the accident. An elderly customer comes into my lane for checkout.)

    Me: “Hello, how are you today ma’am? Did you find everything you were looking for?”

    Elderly Customer: “Actually, I couldn’t find this brownie mix.”

    (The customer shows me a coupon for the mix.)

    Me: “Oh, I can get that for you! Just a moment!”

    (I start to walk away. My limp is showing, as it always is. I hear the woman speak up from behind me.)

    Elderly Customer: “Excuse me!”

    Me: “Yes?”

    Elderly Customer: “I know that you guys like to walk like that, but could you hurry? I’m in a bit of a rush!”

    Me: “What do you mean, ma’am?”

    Elderly Customer: “The way you young lazy n****** walk these days. I’m surprised your pants are even up!”

    (Now I get what she’s saying, and I feel I should show her something. We keep fridge-magnets for sale near the checkout. I call out to a nearby coworker)

    Me: “Hey, [coworker], can you toss me a magnet?”

    (My coworker tosses ones to me, and I stick the magnet to my leg.)

    Me: “My mother and I were hit by a drunk driver when I was 13 years old. I am lucky I can even walk, since my leg is held together by metal rods.”

    (The customer is now screaming incoherently; the only words that could be made out are racial slurs and shrieking. My manager walks up.)

    Manager: “Excuse me, but I’m going to have to ask you to leave the store immediately. You cannot speak to my employees like that.”

    Elderly Customer: “Fine! I don’t care! I wouldn’t buy anything any n***** touched anyway!”

    (The customer continues screaming the whole way out, slowly being drowned out by people cheering her out. When I look at who has been behind her in the line the whole time, I see the girl from the coffee shop next door. I have had a little crush on her for a while. She says that was the most amazing thing she has ever seen, and asks me out!)


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