Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Filled With Creamy Justice
    (1,945 thumbs up)
  • July Theme Of The Month: Animal Madness!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Love/Romance

    Customers sometimes bring their love lives (or lack thereof) with them–for better or worse. PS: be sure to visit Not Always Romantic for more love/romantic stories!

    A Whirlwind Romance

    | Traverse City, MI, USA | Bizarre, Love/Romance

    (I am talking to a guest who walked out of the dining room and came into the gift shop to look around.)

    Me: “If you need anything or have any questions let me know.”

    Guest: “Well I do have a question: are you single?”

    Me: *hesitant* “Yes… Why?”

    Guest: “Well, I have as son who just got a promotion and needs a girlfriend. I was wondering if you would marry him for his money, power, or love?”

    Me: “I’d marry someone for love.”

    Guest: “Good. I don’t want to introduce him to someone who is just after his money and power.”

    Me: “Well, that’s good. Where does he work and what is his new position since he got his promotion?”

    Guest: “He’s the head operator of the ’tilt-a-whirl’ at the fair!”

    Me: *trying hard not to laugh* “Oh, well then, I’d marry him for his crazy amount of power!”

    Giving Marriage A Bad Name

    | VA, USA | Funny Names, Love/Romance

    Customer: “Hi. I’d like to set up an appointment.”

    Me: “Okay. Can I have your last name?”

    Customer: It’s [Name] or it might be [Other Name]. I just changed my name.”

    Me: “Oh, congratulations!”

    Customer: “Actually, I changed back to my maiden name.”

    Me: “Oh! Oops… Congratulations?”

    Gifted At Bad Gift Wrapping

    | Melbourne, VIC, Australia | At The Checkout, Holidays, Love/Romance, Theme Of The Month

    Me: “Would you like me to gift wrap that for you?”

    Customer: “Yes. But can you make it look a bit crap so my girlfriend thinks I did it?”

    Customer Engagement At An All Time High

    | Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Love/Romance, Top

    (A regular customer comes in every Thursday night without fail. She comes in to see what new jewellery we have in stock. On this day, her boyfriend has come into the store at about 1 pm. He specifically asks for me.)

    Boyfriend: “Hi, [My Name]. As you know, [Regular Customer] will be coming in tonight. I need your help to find her the most perfect diamond engagement ring. I don’t want to ask her what she wants. I want her to choose. But… I don’t want her to know. Can you help me?”

    Me: “Oh, absolutely! I’ve already got some ideas! Now, when you come in tonight, please just act normal. Then play along, okay?”

    Boyfriend: “Okay! I knew you could help me with this!”

    (I go speak with my manager and explain everything. She agrees that I can help. Approximately six hours pass. I see the regular customer walking into the store, with her boyfriend behind her. She does her normal look around the store. I’m standing behind the diamond ring section, pretending to clean some of the rings. She eventually makes her way to my section.)

    Me: “Good evening, [Regular Customer]. Come to admire our jewels again?”

    Regular Customer: “This is like Nirvana for me! I absolutely love this store. Always nice staff and nice jewels!”

    Me: “And, as always, it’s lovely to see you again.”

    (The boyfriend is looking a little green at this stage. I know the nerves are really starting to kick in.)

    Me: “Here’s a new diamond ring that came in today.”

    (I hand her the diamond ring, and she is admiring it.)

    Regular Customer: “Nope. Doesn’t do anything for me.”

    (I find a couple of other new rings and show them to her.)

    Me: “What about these? Any of these catch your eye?”

    Regular Customer: “Not really. I’m such a fusspot!”

    Me: *taking a chance* “Would you like to see a ring on your finger?”

    Regular Customer: “Oh… That’s pretty! I like that one!”

    Me: “Good choice! It even has matching wedding bands, so you will be able to have the whole set.”

    Regular Customer: “I like that. Less hassle before a wedding!”

    (I take the ring from her and give it another polish. I stand back a little and watch what I know is about to happen.)

    Boyfriend: “So, this one?”

    (In a split moment, the boyfriend gets down on one knee. He holds the ring up to her and asks her to marry him, right in front of me.)

    Regular Customer: “Oh, my god! YES!”

    (I now have tears in my eyes. The manager rushes over and dumps a whole heap of confetti on them both. I reach underneath my counter and present a champagne bucket with champagne on ice and two glasses.)

    Regular Customer: “Oh, [My Name]. You knew all along! You knew he would do this! Thank you so, so much for helping him!”

    Boyfriend: “How can I ever thank you?”

    Me: “Just come back and get your wedding rings from me!”

    (After the shock and excitement died down a little, we cracked open the champagne. We toasted the happy couple (my champagne was in a coffee cup!). They left about half an hour later. The couple returned to the store about an hour after leaving, with a HUGE arrangement of flowers and my favourite bottle of perfume. It most definitely made my day!)

    How To Make Grandma Nun Too Happy

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Bigotry, Family & Kids, Love/Romance, Top

    (I am Asian. I work as a cashier at a supermarket. Today I get one of my great-aunts in line. We chat as I am checking out her groceries.)

    Aunt: “So have you found anyone yet, [Name]?”

    Me: “Not yet, Auntie.”

    Aunt: “Well, [My Grandma] is getting anxious, you know. She wants great-grandchildren.”

    Me: “She already has great-grandchildren, Auntie. My cousins have kids, remember?”

    Aunt: “Then, your parents! They want to see you married and settled with grandchildren!”

    (My parents have never made any such demands of me, nor made any indication of such being expected. I remain calm and polite, as I am still at work and my great-aunt is a paying customer.)

    Me: *changing the subject slightly* “I think my sister would have something to say about that!”

    (My sister is both older than me and already married.)

    Aunt: “Oh, yes, that’s right! She did the right thing, you know; marrying properly.”

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Aunt: “She married that nice [regional Chinese] boy. Not just [other Chinese], but [regional Chinese], like us. Proper. Your grandma said so.”

    (I am appalled, all the more so because she’s utterly sincere.)

    Me: “…I thought she was joking?”

    Aunt: “Oh no! Very serious. She was quite upset when [My Cousin] married that Vietnamese boy. And all these others, gwailo (white people) and…”

    (She goes on a tirade about not marrying outside the group. I am speechless.)

    Me: “Your total is [amount], Auntie.”

    Aunt: “Oh, I bought too much again! Ah, the boys will eat it. See you soon, [My Name]!”

    (I automatically wave goodbye, still dumbfounded. Finally, she’s bagged her things and gone.)

    Me: *thinking out loud* “Screw this. I might as well join a convent.”

    Next Customer: “I don’t think that’d work for a bright young girl like you, sweetheart.”

    (It is at this point I realize both my new customers are wearing habits and veils.)

    Me: “Oh, crap! Sorry, Sisters.”

    Nun #1: “Don’t be!”

    Nun #2: “We heard what she said. You love who want, when you want, in your own good time.”

    Nun #1: “Besides, running off to a convent doesn’t work like that these days. You need a vocation.”

    (She leans forward to take my hand.)

    Nun #1: “And convent life isn’t all that cracked up to be! You’re a good girl, and a lovely person. We always look for you when we stop by, you know. Take your time to figure out your path.”

    Nun #2: “And if it does lead to us, at least you’ll be prepared! Either way, have faith. Bless you, dear!”

    (I finish ringing them up, and they go on their way. My supervisor walks over.)

    Supervisor: “You all right?”

    (I shrug, dazed.)

    Supervisor: “Go take your break. You’re due for one, anyway.”

    (One of the weirdest and most heartwarming shifts I ever had!)


    Page 2/1112345...Last