November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Liars & Scammers

Ever come across a customer that has made you want to call the police? These ones pretty much ensure it. It goes way beyond the realms of shoplifting or threatening behavior. Some of these customers are too stupid even for those…

Give Me A Low Five

| Canada | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

(A woman and her daughter at my checkout are very pleasant right up until I read her total.)

Me: “All right, your total is $17.93.”

Mother: “Oh, yes, not a problem.”

(She puts a 5$ bill on the counter and we keep chatting. I put the bill under my printer to hold onto it thinking she is getting more. Finally I ask—)

Me: “Ma’am, I still need $12.93.”

Mother: “I gave you a twenty though! You said the bill was 17.93.”

Me: “That is the total, but you only gave me a five—”

Mother: “No, I gave you a f****** twenty. I know I did! Don’t you lie now!”

Me: “Ma’am, all you gave me was a five. I put it right here.”

(I grab the bill and slid it back onto the counter, thinking maybe she just thought she grabbed a twenty. I was shocked considering her daughter looked to be no older than eleven and she is swearing.)

Mother: “Well, look harder. You must have dropped it, you f****** dumb b****!”

(Appalled and getting panicked that I might have made a mistake, I look on the floor around me but I can not find a twenty anywhere.)

Me: “Ma’am, all you gave me was a five. I’m sorry but I don’t see it.”

Mother: “Well, then, you must have pocketed it! Pull out your pockets!”

(I do so and I look more and more worried. This is only my second week and I don’t know what to do.)

Daughter: “Mom, you only put a five.”

Mother: “Shut up, [Daughter]! I know what I did and I know what happened. This b**** distracted us by pretending to be nice!”

(At this point my manager shows up because I was supposed to go on my break and she finds me near tears, being shouted at by this woman.)

Manager: “What is the problem, ma’am?”

Mother: “This f***-tard of woman you hired took my money and then lied! She stole right from me! I demand her fired!”

Daughter: “Mommmmmm! You—”

Mother: “[Daughter], shut it!”

Manager: “[My Name], go on break. I’ve got this.”

(I leave on break pretty much crying now. When I come back my manager is leaning at my cash and decides to share the story:)

Manager: “Apparently this monster of a mother meticulously keeps track of every penny she spends. Has a little book of what she spent and where and had been doing shopping all day. After being given a calculator she realized she spent more than she thought she had and was short twenty dollars because of her own spending. Get this though: even though her daughter kept insisting she was wrong, she wants us to check the security cameras and call her to make sure you didn’t take anything. If she comes in again let me know and I will serve her. She pulls this stunt again and she’s banned.”

(Turned out, a week later she came back and tried it again – this time without her daughter!)

Finally Tagged You

| Waterbury, CT, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Liars & Scammers

(Our store sells used clothing. An elderly woman and her even older mother come in every Wednesday, which has 50% off a specific tag color. The price tags (which are stapled on) are always hanging off their purchases. We know she is changing them while in the dressing room but can’t prove it.)

Me: “Hello! Find everything okay?”

Customer: “Yes. A few of the tags fell off while I was trying them on, though.”

Me: *noticing one specific outfit, tag barely on* “I’m sorry; this one is not on sale.”

Customer: “But it’s the sale color!”

Me: “Ma’am, I priced this myself this morning. You changed the tags.”

(The customer turned all shades of red and stormed out with her mother. It was a few months before she came back, and all the tags were secure and correct from then on!)

In The Case Of Ulysses Versus Jackson:

| MI, USA | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

(My father is the owner and I am back from college helping him during summer break. I am a 25-year-old male. A woman gets some things and pays with a $50 dollar bill and the man behind her waits patiently. The man then comes up pays for his things with a $20. I hand him his change.)

Man: “Hey, I paid with a fifty! Where’s the rest of my change?”

Me: “No, you didn’t. The change is correct.”

Man: “You’re trying to rip me off! I paid with a f****** FIFTY!”

(Knowing what he’s trying to pull and knowing my dad hates dealing with people like this, I open the till.)

Me: “Nope, no fifty in here.”

Man: “Y… Yes, there is! You’re trying to f****** rip me off!”

Me: “I haven’t received a fifty all day. Now that I look closer I realize you paid with a ten dollar bill while your order was $15.90. I am going to need another 5.90 please.”

(I put my hand out as if I am expecting money. He is completely thrown off at what I have done and gets flustered.)

Man: “I… I want to see a manager NOW!”

Me: “I am the owner’s son. If you don’t pay off the rest of your order I’m going to call the cops.”

(I still have my hand out as if to take his money. The man steps back and looks around stammering to himself.)

Man: “I paid with a $20 and you gave me the correct change.” *bolts out the door*

Ripping Your Credit To Pieces

| Portland, OR, USA | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

(I am at the checkout and overhear this conversation between my manager and a customer she just finished helping.)

Customer: “You gave me a ripped dollar bill. I need you to replace it.”

Manager: “I didn’t give you the ripped bill.”

Customer: “Are you trying to call me a liar? I want a manager!”

Manager: “Ma’am, I am a manager, and you just paid with a credit card.”

Lying Is All Relative(s), Part 3

| PA, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers

(I’m in high school, and work at my father’s pharmacy during the summer. One day a woman who looks to be in her mid-twenties rushes up to my line, cutting several people. She dumps multiple boxes of prescription medication on the counter, as well as about $50 worth of make-up, hair dye, and jewelry.)

Customer: “I’m the owner’s daughter, so I get all this stuff for free, okay?”

Me: “Ma’am, please get to the back of the line.”

Customer: “For the love of God, just ring me up! I’m the owner’s daughter! I don’t have time to wait!”

Me: “You’re the owner’s daughter?”

Customer: “Yes! What are you, f****** deaf? Just f****** ring my stuff up so it won’t set off the alarm!”

Me: “Wow, that’s such a coincidence.”

Customer: “Excuse me?”

Me: *smiling widely*I’m the owner’s daughter, too!”

(The customer stared at me for a second, then turned beet red and ran out of the store, leaving her items on the counter. She hasn’t been back since!)

Lying Is All Relative(s), Part 2
Lying Is All Relative(s)