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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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  • April Themed Story Giveaway: Creepy Customers!
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    Category: Liars & Scammers

    Ever come across a customer that has made you want to call the police? These ones pretty much ensure it. It goes way beyond the realms of shoplifting or threatening behavior. Some of these customers are too stupid even for those…

    A Half-Baked Notion

    | London, England, UK | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers, Themed Giveaway

    (I am an 18-year-old male. I work at a local bakery around the corner from my house on the weekends. I’m busy dealing with a customer, who happens to be my older sister by five years. Since it’s quiet at the moment, I’m just having a quick chat with her whilst my coworker deals with the only other customer in the store.)

    Me: “Well, anyway, I should get back to clearing the shelves. I will see you at home later?”

    Sister: “Yea sure!”

    (The other customer has apparently been eavesdropping, and walks up to my sister.)

    Customer: “Don’t you think you should wait until you’re older before you start dating men?”

    (The customer then turns to me.)

    Customer: “AND YOU! You should be ashamed of yourself! This girl can’t be more than 16, and you’re taking advantage of her!”

    (To be fair my sister is short and very slim. I’m 6′ 2″ and quite bulky, so she is often mistaken for being younger than me.)

    Me: “I’m terribly sorry, but you seem to have misunderstood. This is my sister, and she’s actually older than me.”

    Customer: “Don’t you try to justify yourself to me you monster; you’re taking advantage of this poor girl.”

    (The customer then tries to take my sister by the hand and lead her out of the store.)

    Customer: “Come with me, dear; I won’t let that man hurt you.”

    Sister: “No, that really is my brother! You don’t understand.”

    Customer: “No, dear, don’t believe his lies. Let’s get you away from here and call the police.”

    (He drags my sister out onto the street. I rush after them, because as far as I’m concerned, this man is in the act of kidnapping my sister.)

    Me: “Hey stop! GET OFF MY SISTER!”

    (The man turns around to face me, at which point several other store owners have come out to see what’s going on. I decide to make a last ditch attempt to reason with this man before I try and force him to let go of my sister.)

    Me: “Look, I’ve got my ID on me and so does my sister! If we show them to you, will you accept that what were telling you is the truth?”

    Customer: “Fine, but I warn you I know fakes when I see them!”

    (My sister and I both show our IDs, which bear the exact same surname and our dates of birth. I see that it all finally clicks into place in the customer’s brain.)

    Customer: “Oh, well, why didn’t you just say so?”

    (The customer saunters off down the street, merry as you like. Once were sure he’s gone, my sister walks round the corner back home. It’s only then we realize that in all the drama, the customer never actually paid for the bread and cakes he had bought. We all now wonder if he just forgot like we did, or if we were a victim of the most impressive scam to steal bread and cake in history!)

    Receipted All That Was Coming To Her

    | CA, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Liars & Scammers, Themed Giveaway, Wild & Unruly

    (I work at a large retail store. A customer is just about to approach my register, when my counter phone rings. It is security.)

    Security: “For this customer, just allow the return, then step away from my counter.”

    (That is all they tell me. The customer then approaches.)

    Me: “How can I help you today, ma’am?”

    (The customer hands me an expensive bedding set.)

    Customer: “Yes, I would like to return this, please.”

    (I look at the receipt, and notice it was paid by cash.)

    Me: “Okay, one moment, ma’am.”

    (I process the return, give her the cash, and step away from my register as if to tidy shelves nearby. The customer walks away, and two minutes later my coworker from another department runs over and grabs me by the arm.)

    Coworker: “What in the world just happened? Are you all right!?”

    Me: “I’m fine. What’s going on?”

    Coworker: “Security and the police just tackled your customer into the lingerie displays!”

    (It turns out the customer was a scammer that would come in with just a receipt, pick up the item from the shelf that matched the receipt while a worker was busy, and then return the ‘bought’ item for cash. The customer had done this to 12 other stores before us. She was tackled when trying to run, after being confronted by the police.)

    Will Have To Bite The Bullet

    | New Orleans, LA, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Liars & Scammers, Themed Giveaway

    (I am working customer service at a big box store. A customer comes up with a box of bullets. Store policy and law states that ammunition cannot be returned for any reason. This is clearly printed on the bottom of the receipt, surrounded by a double box of asterisks.)

    Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

    Customer: “I need to bring back these bullets; they’re the wrong caliber.”

    (The customer hands me the receipt.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but all ammunition is non-refundable. It says right here—”

    Customer: “No, I don’t want my money back; I just want to get the right ones.”

    Me: “I understand, but we can’t take ammo back under any circumstances. It’s store policy and the law.”

    Customer: “No, no, no! The guy who sold them to me said if they were the wrong size I could come back and exchange it!”

    Me: “No, he didn’t. There are three signs in sporting goods that clearly say you cannot return ammo. On the ammo case, behind the counter, and taped to the counter itself. It’s also clearly marked here on the bottom of your receipt. There is no way any associate in this store would tell you such a thing because it is against the law.”

    (The customer leans over on the counter, in my face.)

    Customer: “Are you calling me a LIAR?!”

    Me: “Yes, sir, I am.”

    (Clearly not expecting that answer, the customer stumbles his words a bit.)

    Customer: “So… so what? I’m out by $30 and stuck with bullets I can’t use?”

    Me: “Yes, sir, you are.”

    Customer: “F***!”

    (He snatches the receipt from my hand, and his bag of ammo, and storms off.)

    Past The Point Of No Return, Part 3

    | Vancouver, BC, Canada | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Themed Giveaway

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like to return this.”

    Me: “Okay. What seems to be the problem?”

    Customer: “I bought this yesterday, and it stopped working. I’d like my money back, please.”

    (There are a few different things wrong with what the customer has just said: although the item she brought back is indeed something that we sell, it looks severely worn out, and the box that it is currently in is an older design. There is no way that this could have been purchased ‘yesterday.’ But since I can’t be accusatory just yet, I try to diffuse the situation.)

    Me: “Okay, ma’am, do you have your receipt?”

    Customer: “No, I don’t have my receipt.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but without a receipt, we cannot do anything.”

    Customer: “Can’t you look it up by my credit card number?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but our system cannot trace back credit card purchases. But if you bring your receipt, I promise you, we will take care of everything.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay.”

    (The customer leaves the store. I thought it would be the end of it, because it’s highly unlikely that she would have a valid receipt. Not even five minutes later, she comes back.)

    Customer: “I found my receipt. I’d like my money back, please.”

    (True to her word, she has a genuine receipt! I carefully read it over. The item on the receipt matches the item she is trying to return, but the date of the receipt reads January of 2012. We’re in the middle of 2013 at this point.)

    Me: “Ma’am, the receipt says you bought this in January of 2012. I’m sorry, but I can’t help you.”

    Customer: “You promised me that you would take care of it if I brought the receipt! You’re a liar!”

    Me: “Ma’am, you told me you purchased this yesterday. The receipt is from over a year ago, and the box is an older design. You’re way past our 30-day return period, and you’ve been dishonest with me.”

    Customer: “So… I’m not getting my money back?”

    Me: “Nope. Have a nice day, ma’am.”

    Related:
    Past The Point Of No Return, Part 2
    Past The Point Of No Return

    An Unlikely Story

    | WA, Australia | Books & Reading, Liars & Scammers, Money, Themed Giveaway

    (I have been checking books back in that have been left on our returns desk and come across a new book that has been badly damaged by what looks to be coffee. When the patron comes back to the circulation desk, I show her the book.)

    Me: “Good morning! I’ll check those out for you in just a moment. Unfortunately because this book has been damaged quite badly, we won’t be able to have it in our collection any more. The replacement cost will be [dollar amount]; are you able to pay now or should I send an invoice out?”

    Patron: “Oh, it was like that when I took it out!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but we’d never loan something in that condition, and as it was on your membership, you are liable for the damage done to it while on loan.”

    Patron: “I didn’t do it! You can’t prove I did it! It must have been the person before me! I won’t pay! It’s been like that for ages.”

    Me: “Ma’am, this is a new book. We only got it last month and the only person to have it before you was I. And I can assure you, I didn’t spill coffee on this book.”

    (There is a long pause.)

    Patron: “Um, how much was it?”


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