Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Marriage Of The Undead
    (1,889 thumbs up)
  • November Theme Of The Month: I Don't Work Here!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Hotels & Lodging

    A good hotel prides itself on providing a decent service to all its guests. But when its guests are our stupid customers, there is very little they can do to remedy the situation except pray they’re fully booked the next time they come around!

    No Room For Negotiation

    | USA | Crazy Requests, Hotels & Lodging

    (My hotel is the only one near a very busy pavilion. During concert season, we book up solid.)

    Me: “Hello. May I help you?”

    Caller: “Yes, I need a room.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but we have no more.”

    Caller: “WHAT! You’re lying.”

    Me: “I’m not.”

    Caller: “Yes, you are. You have rooms left. Aren’t you still waiting on people to show up?”

    Me: “Yes…”

    Caller: “Well then, give me their room! I’m here, and they’re not!”

    Me: “I can’t.”

    Caller: “WHY NOT!”

    Me: “Because they’ve reserved that room. I have to hold it for a few more hours. If they still don’t show until then, you may have it.”

    Caller: “That’s stupid! You’re just being mean!”

    Me: “No, what’s ‘mean’ is if I gave you their room that they booked. How would you like it if I gave one of your rooms that you booked?”

    Caller: *blank stare*

    Me: “Exactly…”

    Caller: “You just lost some money!” *storms off*

    (The reservation did show, so we didn’t.)

    Weekly Roundup: Hotels & Lodging

    | Not Always Right | Hotels & Lodging, Roundups

    Weekly Roundup: Hotels & Lodging! In this week’s roundup, we share five stories about hotel & motel customers!

    1. Smoking Rate Gets Smokers Irate (2,101 thumbs up)
    2. Unable To Order, Drunken Disorder (1,959 thumbs up)
    3. Can’t Keep Up With The Joneses (4,248 thumbs up)
    4. When (Not) In Rome (1,940 thumbs up)
    5. Voodoo Or Do Not, There Is No Jedi (2,813 thumbs up)

    PS #1: check out our Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!

    PS #2: Read more roundups here!

    Not A Fan Of The Fan

    | CA, USA | Hotels & Lodging

    (I am working the front desk at my hotel, when one of the guests comes up.)

    Me: “Good morning! Do you need to check out?”

    Customer: “Yes, but I want to complain.”

    Me: “Oh, dear. What seems to be the problem?”

    Customer: “Well, the fan in the bathroom is very loud, and it kept me up all night!”

    Me: “It did? I’ll leave a note for maintenance. That’s strange, though. It wouldn’t turn off at all?”

    Customer: “No! I thought it was on a timer or something, but it just kept running all night long!”

    Me: “That’s very odd. Was it running when you entered the room?”

    Customer: “No, it turned on when I… flipped… the…” *blinks a bit in realization* “Oh! Well, poop!”

    Me: “…turned on the light in the bathroom?”

    Customer: “Yup. Sorry to bother you!”

    Straight-Talking Travel Agency

    | Tel Aviv, Israel | Hotels & Lodging, Top, Tourists/Travel

    Me: “Hello, this is [travel agency]; how can I help you?”

    Customer: “Hello. I bought a tour to Prague from you a while ago, and yesterday I googled the hotel and… uh…”

    Me: “Yes?…”

    Customer: “Well, there’s lots of reviews online saying that the hotel is favored by homosexuals and lesbians.”

    Me: “Really?”

    Customer: “Yes. I’d like a different hotel, if you don’t mind.”

    Me: “Are you sure? It could be fun!”

    Customer: *laughing* “I’m not sure about that. I’m coming there with my wife, you know.”

    Me: “Think about it. You’re going abroad for an exotic experience. Why not go all the way and choose a hotel with a difference?”

    Customer: “I still think I’d be uncomfortable there. I have nothing against gay people, but still—”

    Me: “There’s no reason you should be uncomfortable… Unless, of course, you’re having certain doubts…”

    Customer: “No doubts, thank you. But how do I explain it to my wife?”

    Me: “Just tell her that if she doesn’t behave herself, you’ll leave her for another man.”

    Customer: *laughing hard* “Sold!”

    The Key To Karma

    | VA, USA | Hotels & Lodging, Theme Of The Month, Wild & Unruly

    (A sour-looking customer comes in to check in. Throughout, I try to remain polite and friendly, but he just grunts and snatches his key out of my hand and goes up to his room. A few minutes later, he storms back in, and flings the keycards at me.)

    Customer: “THESE KEYS DON’T WORK!”

    Me: “I’m sorry about that; maybe I made a mistake keying them.”

    (I check the system.)

    Me: “Huh, these say that they are working. Are you sure that you went to the right room?”

    Customer: “I went to 510!”

    Me: “It says 518.”

    (The customer turns pale, snatches the keys again, and storms off. I don’t hear from him again, so I guess he got the right room. Meanwhile, I get a nasty call from the person who was in room 510, saying that someone had tried to break down her door, screaming!)

    Page 15/27First...1314151617...Last