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  • September Theme Of The Month: Overheard!

    Category: Hotels & Lodging

    A good hotel prides itself on providing a decent service to all its guests. But when its guests are our stupid customers, there is very little they can do to remedy the situation except pray they’re fully booked the next time they come around!

    His Logic Has Checked Out

    | CO, USA | Hotels & Lodging

    (I am working at the front desk at about 10 pm. An older gentleman approaches.)

    Me: “How can I help you? ”

    Guest: “I want to check out now.”

    Me: “Okay, no problem. Why leaving so early?”

    Guest: “Oh, I’m still going to be in the room till tomorrow morning.”

    Me: “…Then I’m sorry, sir. I can’t check you out tonight, as our system would then tell us your room would be vacant.”

    Guest: “But I want to check out now! Not tomorrow morning.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I can’t do that. See, what room are you in?”

    Guest: “Room 000.”

    Me: “So, if I check you out now and another person comes in and wants a room, I can say ‘Sure! Room 000 is open.’ You understand?”

    Guest: “But I don’t want to do it tomorrow! I want to check out now!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, you can’t check out until you’re leaving the hotel.”

    Guest: “Well, I can see I’m getting nowhere.” *stomps off talking about how stupid I am*

    Coworker: “Maybe we should send another guest to 000 and when he yells at us for THAT tell him we checked him out like he asked.”

    Suited To Handle This Case

    | Boston, MA, USA | Hotels & Lodging, Rude & Risque

    (A well-known guest comes down to the front desk.)

    Me: “Hi, [Guest], how are you doing?”

    Guest: “Not good at all.”

    Me: “What’s wrong?”

    Guest: “I need to be moved to a new room.”

    (The hotel is at 100% occupancy so there is no way I can move her.)

    Me: “Why would you need to be moved? Is there something wrong with the room?”

    Guest: “Very wrong! There is a loud vibrating throughout the whole room and I won’t be able to sleep tonight unless I move because it is so bothersome!”

    Me: “How about I come take a look in your room to see what the problem is?”

    (We go up to her room, and she wasn’t wrong. The whole room was making a loud vibrating sound and was pretty disruptive.)

    Guest: “See how bad it is? Move me now, please!”

    (I walk around the room and notice the sound is loudest over in the corner by her suitcase.)

    Me: “It seems to be coming from the corner of the room. Maybe something is going on in the room next door?”

    Guest: “I have no idea but it’s really annoying me!”

    (I notice the vibration is coming from her suitcase and I start to get nervous thinking I am about to discover something I am not suppose to see.)

    Me: “Miss, it seems to be coming from your suitcase. Is there anything in there that would be making this sound.”

    Guest: *looking nervous* “Oh, um, I didn’t even think of it coming from my suitcase. Let me go look.”

    (She went over to the suitcase, looking embarrassed, and I started to feel awkward. I felt like I should have left before I saw what she pulled out but she told me to stay. My suspicion ended up being right; she pulled a vibrator out of her suitcase and apologized for the hassle. Then she continued to talk to me about unrelated events while casually holding the vibrator.)

    Wireless, Clueless, And Hopeless, Part 17

    | USA | Hotels & Lodging, Technology

    Guest: *on phone* “Your Internet’s not working.”

    Me: “Hmm, let me check… Yes, it is working. That means it’s your computer that has a problem.”

    Guest: “My computer’s brand new! I VERY much doubt it has a problem.”

    Me: “Well, how about you bring it down to the front desk and I could have a look and maybe make it work?”

    Guest: “FINE!”

    (She hangs up. She brings an old battered looking Mac model that I’m not familiar with.)

    Guest: “I still believe it’s your Internet that’s not working, and you’re too ashamed to admit it.”

    Me: “Ma’am, our Internet works fine! See?”

    (I hold up my tablet, which has the Internet working fine on it.)

    Guest: “Humph! Then why won’t it work on my computer! It’s my son’s and he said it was brand new!”

    Me: “I don’t know…”

    (After a while of poking around, I realize the wireless adapter is not turned on. I look for the switch or button but can’t find it. The lady finally calls her son to ask where it is and we finally get it working.)

    Me: “There, see? It’s was just that the wireless was not turned on. Now it’s working fine…”

    Guest: *red faced* “It was still your Internet that was the problem! I will complain!”

    Related:
    Wireless, Clueless, And Hopeless, Part 16
    Wireless, Clueless, And Hopeless, Part 15
    Wireless, Clueless, And Hopeless, Part 14

    The Brain Is Vacant, The Room Is Not

    | Dubai, UAE | Crazy Requests, Hotels & Lodging

    (I work at the front desk of a big hotel, which is currently fully booked. One in-house guest would like to extend, but we have to decline. Finally, he comes to check out.)

    Guest: “I think that what you are doing is really rude.”

    Me: “How so, sir?”

    Guest: “I wanted to extend my stay here, but you won’t let me.”

    Me: “Yes, I am very sorry about that, but we are fully committed tonight, therefore we are not able to extend your stay. But hopefully next time, Sir.”

    Guest: “But how can you possibly sell my room when I am still in there? You should ask me before you do that, so I can decide whether to stay or not.”

    Me: “…”

    Two Girls, Eight Cups

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Hotels & Lodging

    (We have a self-serve coffee station where two young women are talking.)

    Girl #1: “So, like, what are you going to SAY to him?!”

    Girl #2: *makes a cup of coffee* “I don’t know…”

    Girl #1: “After what he said about you!”

    Girl #2: *makes second cup* “What did he say?”

    Girl #1: “You know! You were there! You heard it all.”

    Girl #2: *makes third cup* “I don’t know… everything is just soooo messed up, you know?”

    Girl #1: “Like, for sure!”

    Girl #2: *makes fourth cup* “I don’t even know what I’ll say to him… I don’t even know if I want to be with him anymore!”

    Girl #1: *sympathetically* “I so understand!”

    Girl #2: *makes fifth cup* “That’s it, I’ll just say GOODBYE!” *makes sixth cup*

    Girl #1: “Good for you. He was a scumbag. Let’s go eat. Say, why are you making all those coffees? Are you like, really thirsty?” *giggles*

    Girl #2: “I don’t know. I’m not going to drink them. I’m just making them!” *makes seventh cup*

    Girl #1: “Well, won’t the employees here be really mad they have to clean that all up?”

    Girl #2: *shrugs* “I don’t know.” *makes eighth cup*

    Girl #1: “You’re so BAD! Teehee!”

    Me: “Excuse me, but we WILL be really mad if you keep wasting our coffee… so stop, please.”

    (They scamper out, grinning mischievously, leaving the mess of used sugar packets, coffee stains and half and half around. Yes, she added it in each one! Nice.)

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