November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Holidays

Even during the holidays, customers don’t seem to take a break. With that many extra light-bulbs around you’d think a few extra would appear above their heads?

Party Crashed And Burned

, | Fairborn, OH, USA | Food & Drink, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(For the past couple of days we’ve had signs on our doors indicating the dining room would be closed for a Christmas party. The night of the party, I come up to the door carrying a dish in a stone pan. The manager opens the door to let me in when a customer runs past me, inside the dining room.)

Me: “What was—”

Manager: “Hold on.” *closes the door behind me* “Now we shouldn’t have customers trying to come in.”

(I set the dish down and go to get my second load from my car. When I get back, a family of customers is seated in a booth next to the food my coworkers and I have brought in.)

Customer: “Hey, you! What is with that food?”

Me: “We’re having a Christmas party.”

Customer: “You are?”

(I look at my coworkers, and then at the decorations and the games we have set up.)

Coworker: “Yes! We closed at nine.”

Customer: “You did?”

Manager: “We have signs up saying that we did.”

Customer: “Well, I didn’t see those.”

Manager: “Because you ran past my employee, who was carrying stuff in for it.”

(The customer blushes and helps his family pack up to leave.)

A Triple Rainbow Of Christmas

| Wollongong, NSW, Australia | Bizarre, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(It’s the week before Christmas. We are run off our feet helping people choose gifts to buy. A customer rushes into the store.)

Customer: “Excuse me. I’m looking for something for someone. What do you think?”

Me: “Um… Who was it you were buying for?”

Customer: “Oh, my daughter. I think she married badly. You know what it’s like when they go and do that.”

Me: “What sort of thing were you looking for? Clothing? Jewellery?”

(The customer starts flouncing around the store picking up random items. She turns with a necklace in hand.)

Customer: “Oh, I don’t know! Just something nice. I like this! It has rainbows! I like rainbows! Do you think she’ll like it?”

Me: “I don’t know your daughter, ma’am. If you think it’s her taste, it’s on sale at the moment.”

Customer: “I don’t know! I just want something. I like rainbows!”

(She proceeds to flounce around the store picking up anything ‘rainbow.’)

Customer: “Do you think she’ll like it? I like rainbows! Rainbows might make her happy!”

Me: *aware of several other people waiting for me* “It’s a perfect choice. I think she will like it.”

Customer: “I don’t know! I just want something… something nice. I like rainbows!”

A Triple Rainbow Of Pens

Christmas Day Meets Groundhog Day

| St. Catharines, ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Holidays, Money, Theme Of The Month

(It is a very busy Sunday afternoon in the store. One of our staff is late due to bad weather and a dead car battery, so we are all rushed off our feet. I take a call.)

Me: “[Store Name]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Yes. Hi. Do you have any sales going on with your Christmas dresses?”

Me: “I’m afraid not, ma’am. There are no dresses on sale at the moment.”

Caller: “How much are the dresses you have?”

Me: “They range from $30 to $50, depending on the dress. But, we might be having a 40 percent off sale later this week. If you’d like to, call back then and check the dresses at that point.”

Caller: “So, what sale do you have for your dresses right now? I want one just above the knee.”

Me: “Well, most of our dresses fall just above the knee, ma’am. Like I said, we have no dresses on sale today, but we might have them on sale later this week.”

Caller: “I’m going to a holiday party, you see, and I need a dress that falls above the knee.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. I understand. If you check back in a few days you might be able to get a dress for 40 percent off.”

Caller: *finally clues in* “40 percent off you say? So what price would the dresses be then?”

Me: “It would depend on the dress, ma’am. As I said, they range from $30 to $50.”

Caller: “Oh, so how much would the $50 dollar dress be? I’m going to a holiday party and need a dress above the knee. You don’t have any dresses on sale today? Do you?”

Me: *facepalm*

The Only Thing She Skipped Was Kwanzaa

| NY, USA | At The Checkout, Holidays, Religion, Theme Of The Month

(I’m standing behind a nice old lady who is checking out at the grocery store.)

Lady: “You look like you both need a smile. This is for you!”

(She hands the cashier a few pieces of Christmas themed candy, and gives one to me.)

Cashier: “Oh, thank you! Happy Holidays!”

Lady: “Oh, it’s okay. You can say ‘Merry Christmas’ to me. I know you want to.”

Cashier: “Actually, I’m Jewish—”

Lady: “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you. Oh, yes! Feliz Navidad to you!”

(The cashier and I both just smiled, because regardless of what you call it, she still had the best seasonal spirit!)

Christmas Jeer

| Naples, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(I work at an office supply store that also does computer repairs. We are open late for Christmas. I’m the certified technician. The cashier is taking a break, so I volunteer to take over her register. A customer has walked up to the customer service desk. This desk has no register, but there is a register about five feet to the right.)

Customer: “Hey! I was looking for this pocket calendar, but for this year. This other brand has more space, but I can’t find this one.”

Me: “Sure. Let’s go take a look so you can pick the one you want!”

Customer: “I already checked all of them. You don’t have it! I’m NOT walking back there! That’s what I came up here for! Now GO!”

Me: “Okay…”

(I walk back, stunned, and check for the product. We are out of stock. I come back to tell the customer. My coworker has come back, and tries to check another customer out, but register #1 has crashed. She has already taken the customer to register #2 and is checking them out.)

Me: “Unfortunately, ma’am, we are out of stock. We can order the one you want online, however.”

Customer: “No! I’ll just take this one. It’s already in my purse.”

Me: “Okay. I’ll take you over at register #2, as register #1 has crashed.”

(My coworker has finished checking out the customer, and is standing behind me watching this occur. The customer is standing, staring at the wall, obviously ignoring me.)

Me: “Umm, ma’am? I said I can help you at register #2.”

Customer: “You said you’d help me RIGHT HERE!”

Me: “Sorry, I didn’t. Register #1 has crashed, and that’s the customer service desk. I couldn’t ring you up there if I tried.”

Customer: “But that is not open. THIS ONE IS! HELP ME HERE!”

(The light for register #1 is on still, and #2 is off. No one pays attention to the lights so no one turns them on for the occasional customer that is brought to them.)

Customer: “This one’s light isn’t on. You can’t help me here.”

(I turn the light on to humor her and start ringing.)

Customer: “You all are so rude and unhelpful! I can’t believe you would treat me like this!”

Me: “I’m sorry you feel that way about us.”


(At this point I can’t tell whether to be angry or laugh at the absurdity. I am leading the numbers for customer service, and I’m always going out of my way for the customers.)

Me: “Okay. Your total is [total]. You can swipe whenever you are ready. ”

Customer: “I GAVE you the card. Figure it out yourself!”

Me: “Okay.”

(I swipe the card, and turn the PIN-pad towards her.)

Me: “Please sign here.”

(The customer proceeds to scribble on the screen in long sweeping motions, before finally pounding on the screen with the stylus. It does not respond to hard tapping, only light tapping. I’m afraid the screen will break at this rate, so I put my hand out near the screen.)

Me: “Please do not break our screen.” *I tap the button*


(The customer throws the stylus at me.)

Me: “Yes, ma’am.” *hands receipt* “Have a great evening, and happy holidays!”

Customer: “Screw you! You people are so F****** RUDE!”

Me: “Alright!”

(The door closes.)

Me: *to coworker* “I really don’t know whether to be mad or laugh… I’m so conflicted!”