Featured Story:
  • A Caffeinated Christmas Miracle
    (2,996 thumbs up)
  • Category: Holidays

    Even during the holidays, customers don’t seem to take a break. With that many extra light-bulbs around you’d think a few extra would appear above their heads?

    December Themed Story Giveaway: Holidays, Christmas, & New Year

    | Not Always Right | Announcements, Holidays, Theme Of The Month
    Want to win a Not Always Right t-shirt?
    Enter Not Always Right’s December Themed Story Giveaway:
    Holidays, Christmas, & New Year!

    Entering is as easy as 1-2-3:

    1. Submit a funny or interesting story about the holidays, Christmas and New Year.
    2. Enter your email address in the form to qualify.
    3. All posted stories will be entered in a drawing to win a free t-shirt gift certificate, to use in the official Not Always Right shop!

    PS: Congratulations to a lucky reader for winning November’s Themed Story Giveaway, which featured stories about Bizarre Behavior. The winning submission: Giving Her A Little Flight (1,322 thumbs up).

    PS #2: winners will be announced the first Wednesday of every month. Next free t-shirt gift certificate: Wednesday, January 1!

    Just Burst Their Kentucky Fried Bubble, Part 3

    | USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I work for a gourmet chocolate shop, and the majority of our products are imported from several factories in Europe.)

    Customer: “Do you have chocolate turkeys for Thanksgiving?”

    Me: “No, Ma’am, we do not.”

    Customer: “Why the f*** not?!”

    Me: “Well, we’re a Swiss company, and they don’t celebrate Thanksgiving.”

    Customer: “You’re a f***ing liar. Like h*** they don’t celebrate it. It’s a national holiday!”

    Me: “Yes, it is. It’s a national holiday, Ma’am. It’s only celebrated here, in the US. You can try [other European brand], though. I’m pretty sure I saw chocolate turkeys in their window display.”

    Customer: “Trying to make me look stupid, huh? Well fine, I’m never shopping here again! And everyone knows that turkeys are extinct in Europe, so why would [other European brand] have chocolate f****** turkeys?!”

    Me: “…and you have a lovely day, Ma’am.”

    Related:
    From NotAlwaysLearning
    Just Burst Their Kentucky Fried Bubble, Part 2
    Just Burst Their Kentucky Fried Bubble

    5 Thanksgiving & Black Friday Stories of Customers Acting Fowl

    | Not Always Right | Holidays, Roundups

    Weekly Roundup: 5 Thanksgiving & Black Friday Stories of Customers Acting Fowl! In this week’s roundup, we share five Thanksgiving and Black Friday-themed bad customer stories!

    1. No Pranks, Just Thanks (14,669 thumbs up)
    2. Before Black Friday Comes Brainless Thursday (2,007 thumbs up)
    3. Gobble Grunt Gobble (3,305 thumbs up)
    4. Black & Blue Friday (1,133 thumbs up)
    5. She’s Been Placed On The Blacklist (2,376 thumbs up)

    PS #1: check out our Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!

    PS #2: Read more roundups here!

    (Editor’s Note: For all our US readers, have a safe and happy Thanksgiving! Also, if you’re working or shopping this Black Friday, good luck and stay safe!)

    Young Boys Display Monstrous Behavior

    | TX, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I work in a costume shop, and I see a six- or seven-year-old boy looking through the aisle.)

    Me: “Hey there, little guy! Are you looking for a costume?”

    Boy: “Yeah! I’m gonna be a clown, zombie, vampire, werewolf, monster!”

    (The mother of the boy comes around the corner.)

    Mother: “Sweetie, you can only be one, so just choose one.”

    Boy:” Okay, can I be a clown monster werewolf vampire?”

    Me: “But not a zombie?”

    Boy: “Oh yeah, and zombie!”

    Me: “How about we stick two of them together? You can be a werewolf zombie, or a clown monster, or a vampire clown, even.”

    Boy: “Ooh! I want to be a vampire clown. Can I be a vampire clown, please? I want lots of blood.”

    Mother: “Do you even have a vampire clown costume?”

    Me: “We have clown and vampire costumes separately. I’d say a clown outfit, some vampire teeth, and some blood should make the costume right.”

    Boy: “Do you have lots of blood?”

    (I point to the rack with small tubes of fake blood.)

    Me: “We only have these.”

    Boy: “No, I want lots of blood.”

    Me: “Well, I’m sure it’ll have enough—”

    Boy: *serious face* “No. I want lots of blood. I’ll just have to take yours…”

    Hoping They Were Born Yesterday

    | Houston, TX, USA | Food & Drink, Holidays, Liars & Scammers, Theme Of The Month

    (I work at a bakery franchise that specializes in bundt cakes. On loyalty customers’ birthdays, they have the opportunity to come into the store and get a free mini cake. The following exchange happens the week before Halloween over the phone.)

    Me: “Hello! Thank you for calling [Franchise Name]; how may I help you?”

    Caller: “Yeah, hi. I was just calling about the birthday bundtlet? I didn’t get one.”

    Me: “Oh, geez, sorry about that. When did you come in?”

    Caller: “I didn’t. I never got the email with the coupon on it.”

    Me: “Okay. When did you sign up for the loyalty program?”

    Caller: “Um, it was for my cousin’s birthday, so it was a while ago, and…”

    (The customer proceeds to ramble on for a minute or so, making me suspicious that she signed up after her birthday.)

    Me: “Okay, miss. If you come in with your ID, to prove that your birthday was within a week of today, I’ll check to make sure you’re on the loyalty program and get you that cake.”

    Caller: “Oh, my birthday was in August. But my husband’s birthday is in a week, so I’ll just get a bundtlet for then.”

    Me: “No, that won’t work. I’m sorry.”

    Caller: “God, I f****** hate this store. You never work with your customers!”

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