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  • July Theme Of The Month: Great Timing!

    Category: Holidays

    Even during the holidays, customers don’t seem to take a break. With that many extra light-bulbs around you’d think a few extra would appear above their heads?

    The Socks That Saved Christmas

    | Calgary, AB, Canada | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It’s Christmas Eve when a man runs into our store and looks around frantically.)

    Me: “Can I help you find something?”

    Customer: *as if his life depends on it* “There is something I need to get my girls! The fate of Christmas depends on it!”

    (He tells me what he needs and I lead him to them.)

    Me: “Unfortunately, due to it being so close to Christmas, we don’t have a lot of different colours, but here they are.”

    Customer: *eyes lighting up at the sight of them* “Oh, my god! You just saved Christmas!”

    Me: “That’s no problem.”

    (I go and help some more customers, but I come back to him later.)

    Me: “Are you still finding everything all right?”

    Customer: “Yes. Thank you. You saved Christmas!”

    (Later, I happen to be at the till when my boss is checking the guy out.)

    Boss: “Did you find everything all right today?”

    Customer: *points to me* “Yes. That young lady just saved Christmas!”

    (The man check out and goes happily on his way, and another customer who I noticed had seen the man thanking me a few times, comes up to me.)

    Customer: “So, what exactly did you get him that the fate of Christmas rested upon?”

    Me: “Fuzzy socks.”

    Mall Up In Arms

    , | Seattle, WA, USA | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It’s New Year’s Eve and the mall closes at six pm. Anchor stores that have outside access can choose to stay open later. We have just closed our door and I begins to close the register…)

    Customer: *bangs hard on out glass doors with both fists and screams something inaudible*

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, the mall is closed.”

    Customer: *screams inaudibly again*

    Me: *walks to the door to better hear her*

    Customer: “I need to buy [item] right now!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but the mall is closed. It’s New Year’s Eve. We close at six pm as posted in several locations in the mall.”


    Me: “Again, ma’am, I’m sorry but I cannot help you. As I said before the mall is closed and has been for the past 10 minutes.”

    Customer: “THAT’S A LIE! [Anchor Store Across The Hall] IS OPEN!”

    Me: “They have outside access through their store. We do not.” *I start to walk away*

    Customer: *starts kicking our glass door*

    Coworker: “Ma’am, my manager has already told you we cannot help you. If you continue to kick at our door we will be forced to call security.”

    Customer: *runs*

    (The item she wanted was a rather expensive hanging wall piece that had nothing to do with New Years. It most certainly wasn’t worth being detained.)

    Unlucky At Cards

    | FL, USA | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (During the Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years seasons we get very busy and the theft rate skyrockets, so it’s not uncommon for me to walk the store when people are browsing just to quietly watch.)

    Customer: *acting somewhat shady; trying to keep one side to me as he browses cards*

    (I move to another aisle where I’m able to watch him in the mirror in the corner of the store. I watch him try and palm some Christmas cards in order to try and steal them.)

    Me: “Excuse me, Sir?”

    (The customer looks up with raised brows; still keeping his one side with the palmed Christmas cards away from me.)

    Me: “I noticed you were browsing our card selection. Might I suggest we some of the wonderful New Years cards that would go splendidly with the Christmas cards you have in hand?” *smiles warmly*

    (Knowing he’s busted, the customer set the cards down and promptly left the store.)

    Should Have Put Dairy In The Diary

    | Canada | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I work in a fast food coffee shop. Every year since it opened, our location has been the only store to remain open during the holidays. I volunteer to work Christmas Day.)

    Coworker: “Thank you for choosing [Store]. How can we help you?”

    Customer: *in drive thru* “Excuse me, are you guys open?”

    Coworker: “Yes, ma’am, we are. What can we get for you?”

    Customer: “Do you know if the grocery store next door is open?”

    Coworker: “Unfortunately I do not know their holiday hours. You will have to go take a look.”

    Customer: “You are a coffee shop, right? You must have cream, right?”

    Coworker: “Yes, ma’am, we do.”

    Customer: “Great. I don’t want to go the store, so can I have 16 cups of cream?”

    Coworker: “I am sorry; I have no way of entering that into my till.”

    Customer: “Well, just give me a carton.”

    Coworker: “I can’t do that, ma’am. I will need to charge you for it, but since we don’t sell cream by the cup or carton I have no way of doing so.”

    Customer: “Just give me some d*** cream. I need it for a recipe for Christmas dinner. It is an emergency!”

    Coworker: “Once again, I am sorry but we cannot just give you 16 cups of cream.”

    Customer: “Well, what am I going to do now for dinner?!”

    Coworker: “I do not know, ma’am, but if it was as important as you said you wouldn’t have waited to get the ingredients until Christmas Day, when everything basically closes.”

    Comic: Too Rich For Jesus’ Blood

    | Gulf Shores, AL, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Comics, Holidays, Religion

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