October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: History

Customers who don’t remember history are not only doomed to repeat it, but in some of these stories, to completely rewrite it!

Conspiracy Weary, Part 2

| Niagara on the Lake, ON, Canada | History, Tourists/Travel

(The town of Niagara on the Lake is celebrating the 200th anniversary of the war of 1812 and we occasionally get tourists asking about it. This tourist has been nice and friendly up to this point.)

Me: “Here’s your change. Have a nice day!”

Tourist: “I have a question. What’s all this 1812 stuff about?”

Me: “Well, 200 years ago, the United States went to war with the British in what is now Canada. Neith—”

Tourist: “THAT NEVER HAPPENED! THAT’S A LIE!” *stomps out of the store*

Me: *stunned*

Conspiracy Weary

Going Native

| Kansas City, KS, USA | History

(We have our patients review their insurance/contact information before their visit roughly once a year. This ensures that everything that we have on file is up-to-date.)

Old Man: *looks over information* “There’s something on here that I want to change.”

Old Man’s Wife: “Honey, our address and phone number have been the same for 20 years. What could you want to change?”

Old Man: “Right here where it says ‘Caucasian,’ it should say ‘Native American.'”

Old Man’s Wife: “Why would it need to say ‘Native American?’ You’re not an Indian, honey. You were born in Kentucky.”

Old Man: “Yeah, I was born in Kentucky. Kentucky is in America. I was born in America. That makes me a NATIVE American!” *shakes head*

The Great State Of Confusion, Part 6

| New Jersey, USA | Geography, History

(My university has a very long winter break which allows me to work over the holidays. I am working the Christmas season when a customer begins to make small talk.)

Customer: “What high school do you go to, sweetheart?”

Me: “I am actually in college and am just working seasonal.”

Customer: “Oh! Where do you go?”

Me: “The University of Delaware.”

Customer: “What state is that in?”

Me: “Delaware.”

Customer: “Yes, honey, I heard you but what state is that in?”

Me: “The state is Delaware.”

Customer: “When did Delaware become a state?”

Me: “It was the first state in 1776.”

Customer: *stays quiet for the rest of the transaction*

The Great State Of Confusion, Part 5
The Great State Of Confusion, Part 4
The Great State Of Confusion, Part 3
Make Benefit Glorious Guestlogisticstan
The Great State Of Confusion, Part 2
The Great State Of Confusion
The Great State Of Ignorance

(Don’t) Remember The Alamo

| Colorado, USA | History

Customer: *walks up to ticket booth* “What is The Alamo about?

Employee: “The Alamo, ma’am. It’s the mission building the Texans had to protect when the Mexican army invaded during the Battle of the Alamo.”

Customer: “Oh my gosh! We’re at war with Mexico?!”

S.H.I.E.L.D. Me From This Stupidity

| San Diego, CA | History

(A customer walking out of the theater for “Captain America” with her two kids starts talking to me. She’s about 45 years old.)

Customer: “My goodness, the Nazis were awful people!”

Me: “Yeah.”

Customer: “I’m just glad that terrible Red Skull got what was coming to him.”

Me: “Yeah, it was a pretty sweet ending.”

Customer: “It’s funny. I don’t remember learning about him or Captain America in the history books.”

Me: *thinking she’s joking* “Ha ha, yeah. Weird, right?”

Customer’s son, to me: “No, dude. She’s not kidding.”

Customer: “Kidding about what?”

(Embarrassed, her two kids try to walk briskly away from her.)

Customer: *chasing after her kids* “Whaaat?! What is it?!”

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