Category: Health & Body

Stupid customers in stories are bad enough. However, dealing with a customer’s health issues may be hazardous to your own health! Please consult your doctor before continuing.

Treating That Attitude Problem

| England, UK | Bad Behavior, Health & Body

(We frequently get patients acting rudely and/or aggressively to the reception staff for various reasons such as the doctor running late, but the doctors never really believe it as the patient is all nice when they see the doctor. If a patient is rude or aggressive they receive a warning letter and if it happens a second time they are no longer allowed to be seen at this doctors’ office. On this day we have a young female doctor working with us for a few weeks before she returns to Ireland; she looks about 20 and is very small and petite. She is standing in reception when an agitated patient arrives:)

Patient: “I’ve got an appointment with [Young Doctor].”

Receptionist: “Can I take your name, please?”

(The patient gives his name and the receptionist realises his appointment was around 20 minutes earlier.)

Receptionist: “I’m sorry, [Patient], but you’re 20 minutes late for your appointment. I’ll have to ask [Young Doctor] if she will still see you.”

Patient: “You’ve got to be f****** kidding me. I’m only 20 minutes late! The doctors make me wait often enough! Just tell the f****** doctor that I’m here and I’m not leaving until I’ve seen her.”

(At this point the receptionist turns to the young doctor to ask her if she will still see the patient.  She addresses her by her forename but only manages to get her name out before the patient interrupts.)

Patient: “Oh, my god, you stupid cow! Stop gossiping and just go sort it out with the f****** doctor, will you!”

(The doctor leaves to go to the consulting room but quietly tells the receptionist to phone her, which she does. The doctor tells the receptionist she will see the patient and to send him in. After the consultation we found out it went something like this:)

Patient: *smiling* “All right, doc?”

Young Doctor: “[Patient], you were very rude when you were in reception.”

Patient: *starts blushing* “What? I apologised for being late but the receptionist shouted at me. She was the one being rude.”

(The young doctor realises the patient hadn’t recognised her, so repeated his conversation almost word for word. He still denied it all.)

Young Doctor: “[Patient], I was in reception when you arrived. I was the one [Receptionist] turned to when you called her a stupid cow. She was polite to you and didn’t turn you away for being past your appointment time. I will consult with you today but you owe both of us an apology and if we don’t get one I will make sure you receive a warning letter.”

(The patient stammered through an apology, had his consultation, and was reminded on leaving to apologise to the receptionist, which he did!)

Licked Clean(er)

| MO, USA | Family & Kids, Health & Body

(A woman and her young child are standing in line, looking at the baked goods on display in glass cases. The child begins licking the glass.)

Coworker: “Uh, ma’am? Could you please keep your son from licking the glass?”

Female Customer: “Don’t worry about it. He’s not hurting anything.”

Coworker: “Maybe not, but I just cleaned the glass, and I’m fairly sure the cleaner is toxic when ingested.”

A Disability At Having A Disability

| USA | Health & Body, Liars & Scammers

(I work in an assisted living facility. Our residents run the range from sharp as a nail to completely senile, and perfectly fit to bedridden. This particular woman, whose health care is paid for by the state, has in her medical records that she cannot stand, cannot use one arm at all, and has limited use of her other. There is nothing wrong with her mentally.)

Me: *forgetting to knock before entering her room* “Hey. Sorry to disturb you. I’m just here to… get your… trash…”

(She’s standing at her sink, washing an apple. We lock eyes, and she slowly lowers herself to the floor.)

Me: “Um…”

Female Customer: “I crawled over, but I can’t get up now.”

Me: “Do you need me to call anyone for help?”

Female Customer: “No. No need to give the nurses extra work. I’ll manage. Would you be all right to come back later?”

Me: “…Sure.”

(Apparently I’m not the first one to catch her. But we could never conclusively prove that she was faking disability.)

Giving His Leg A Clean Break

| WI, USA | Health & Body, Liars & Scammers

(Every month a cleaning company comes into our business to buff the tile floors. It is about 9:45 and we close at 10:00 so the last minute rush has begun. A middle-aged man enters and notices the cleaning crew mopping the floors.)

Man: *dramatically falls landing on his leg* “Ow! My leg! Why didn’t you tell me the floor was wet?” *followed by more moans of agony*

Me: “Sir, we have a problem.”

Man: “Of course we have a d*** problem! I just broke my f****** leg!”

Me: “Well… they haven’t even cleaned this side of the store yet.”

(Suddenly his yells of pain are silenced. Then, he stands up on his ‘broken leg’ and quickly darts out the door. But I did receive applause from both the other customers and the cleaning crew!)

On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 9

, | USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Health & Body

(I am in high school. I work at a fast food restaurant. Part of the uniform includes a hat or visor. On this day I am taking orders at the front register. I am handing back change to an older male customer who has been normal so far.)

Me: “Okay, sir, here is your change and your order will be ready in a sec.”

(I then go to take the next customer’s order when the older man grabs the brim of my hat and looks me directly in the eyes.)

Older Man: “Oh, I thought you had brown eyes.”

(A coworker then places his food on the tray and the man walks away without another word.)

Next Customer: “I promise I won’t touch you. I just want a burger.”

Related:
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 8
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 7
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 6

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