Category: Health & Body

Stupid customers in stories are bad enough. However, dealing with a customer’s health issues may be hazardous to your own health! Please consult your doctor before continuing.

Have A Heart (Attack)

| SK, Canada | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Health & Body, Top

(I work at a walk-in medical clinic located in a shopping center. It is about 20 minutes before closing and as a result, it’s only the doctor and I working. A man walks in complaining of chest pain, and goes into full cardiac arrest. I am in the back assisting the doctor for approximately 10 minutes as he stabilizes the patient and the paramedics arrive. Once the paramedics take over, I head for the front desk. There is a patient waiting.)

Patient: “About d*** time! I have been waiting for five minutes!”

Me: “I am sorry, ma’am. We had a patient in full cardiac arrest and the doctor required my assistance.”

Patient: “That’s no excuse for bad service. I shouldn’t have had to wait that long. Now, I want to see a doctor.”

Me: “Unfortunately, the doctor will be leaving with the patient and paramedics to go to the hospital. We have to close a few minutes early.”

Patient: “This is ridiculous. I have a sore throat and I need to see a doctor. I demand I be seen before the doctor leaves. Whoever else can wait; I am leaving on a trip tomorrow, and must be seen today.”

Me: “Ma’am, emergencies take precedence. A heart attack beats a sore throat. You either have to come back tomorrow, or seek care elsewhere.”

Patient: “I don’t care about your excuses! I am a busy, important person, and need to see a doctor now!”

(I have lost all patience. I am about to throw her out, when the paramedics start wheeling out the cardiac-arrest patient on the gurney, followed by the doctor.)

Patient: *still yelling* “There, the doctor is right there. He can see me before he takes care of that lazy guy!”

Doctor: “Tell you what: have a heart attack right now, and I will be happy to assist you. Otherwise, get your insensitive a** out of my clinic and don’t ever come back.”

(The customer storms out, but actually tries to come back the next day. She is refused. The man makes a full recovery and sends flowers, gift cards and thoughtful notes to both the doctor and me for the help.)

No Further Steps Were Taken

| Wales, UK | Bizarre, Health & Body

(Some of our storage space consists of large cupboards in the walls above our displays. I am standing at the top of a ladder checking a cupboard for stock, when I vaguely overhear an older woman talking to someone behind me.)

Customer: “…see if he notices.”

(The customer proceeds to shake the bottom of the ladder I’m standing on, then speaks to the man she is with.)

Customer: “I wonder if he’ll get scared?”

Me: “Um, hi. Did you want me to move the ladder out of the way?”

Customer: “No, I was just wondering if you’d notice.”

Me: “I did notice. And you’d certainly have noticed if I’d landed on your head…”

Gift Carded And Dearly Departed

| Tacoma, WA, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Health & Body, Top

(I am working as an assistant manager at a retail store. A customer comes in while it is slow, so I am able to pay a lot of attention to her, and find her exactly what she wants.)

Customer: “Is it okay to pay by gift card?”

Me: “Of course.”

(I start ringing her in.)

Customer: “I hate to use it though.”

Me: “Oh really? Why is that?”

Customer: “My mom gave it to me for my last birthday, and she passed away two months ago.”

(I pause for a moment to make eye contact with her.)

Me: “I’m so sorry to hear that. I lost my own mom a little over a year ago, so I know what you’re going through.”

Customer: “Oh! I guess you do understand then. Does it get easier?”

Me: “No. I still miss her horribly, and still want to pick up the phone and call her every single day. But I suppose I’m not as raw as I was. You’ll get to that point too, though you’ll always miss her.”

Customer: “Yeah…”

(I finish ringing her up, and swipe her gift card, which pays for everything. Afterwards, I bring her bag around the counter for her, and hand it to her.)

Customer: “Can I… can I make a really strange request?”

Me: “Sure.”

Customer: “Can I keep the gift card?”

Me: “Oh, of course you can!”

(I hand it to her. She puts it back in the envelope that bears her name, and caresses it. I can see she’s on the verge of tears.)

Me: “Right before my mom died, she gave me the package she never sent me for my birthday, which had some Avon perfume in it. I like the perfume, but I hardly ever use it, because I don’t want to have to throw away one of the last things she ever gave me.”

Customer: “Oh, so you completely understand why I want to keep this!”

Me: *eyes filling with tears* “Oh yes, ma’am, completely!”

(We wind up chatting for close to 45 minutes, sharing stories about our moms. By the end of it, we’re both crying openly, but they’re good tears.)

Customer: “I’ve taken up so much of your time; I’m sorry.”

Me: “No, don’t apologize. I’m so glad you came in, and that you were willing to share with me!”

Customer: “Can I… can I hug you?”

Me: “Of course you can!”

(We hug for a long time, with both of us still crying. She thanks me profusely, and vows to come back and ask for me especially. I never did see her again, as I quit not long after that, but it was a wonderful experience. I hope wherever she is, her grief has become less raw than it was when I saw her. I’ll always, always remember her as being one of the best customers I ever had.)

Make Appoint To Forget

, | Los Angeles, CA, USA | Health & Body

Me: “Thank you for calling [Hospital]; how can I help you?”

Patient: “I need to cancel an appointment I have today.”

Me: “All right, let’s verify your information and then we’ll look at the appointment.”

(As the patient verifies everything, I note he is 25 years old, the appointment is urgent, and was made earlier that day. He has already spoken to a nurse as well.)

Me: “Okay. I see the appointment with [Doctor] at [time], and you want me to cancel it?”

Patient: “Yes. Oh, and can you tell me what the appointment was for? I can’t remember.”

(I hover over the cancel button as I tell the patient.)

Me: “Sir, it is for forgetfulness. Are you sure you want to cancel?”

Patient: *silent for a moment* “Yes, go ahead and cancel it.”

Hear-Resistible

| Greenville, SC, USA | Family & Kids, Health & Body, Theme Of The Month

(Both of my earlobes are stretched to half an inch.)

Young Girl: *in a loud kid’s whisper* “Mommy, her ears are broken!”

Mother: *mortified* “I am SO sorry!”

Me: *laughing* “No, no, it’s fine! That’s the best thing I’ve heard all day!”

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