November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Health & Body

Stupid customers in stories are bad enough. However, dealing with a customer’s health issues may be hazardous to your own health! Please consult your doctor before continuing.

Completely Obamacareless

| VI, USA | Crazy Requests, Health & Body, Money

(I work in client intake for a private pay home health care. We don’t take insurance of any kind and cater to a wealthier crowd in a home health agency. A woman calls up demanding care.)

Me: “Hello. this is [Company]. How can I help you today?”

Client: “Yes, I need to get set up with care in my home!”

Me: “Great, I will just need to get some information from you and get one of our nurses to come out and do an assessment with you.”

(I explain our pricing and our rates, I explain we are private pay only and do not accept insurance of any kind.)

Client: “Oh, this sounds wonderful! My doctor. told me you would all take wonderful care of me! Who do I have my doctor fax the orders for Medicaid to?”

Me: “Ma’am, as I have already stated to you we do not take Medicaid or any other insurance!”

Client: “Yeah, but my doctor wrote an order! You have to do it!”

Me: “I am sorry, but because we do not work with insurance companies a doctor can not just write an order and expect us to take it. We are not set up to even work with Medicaid.”

(I explain again how we work and how our payment system is set up etc.. making sure to let her know clearly that we do not take any insurance and that she will have to pay 100% out of pocket!)

Client: “Well, this is just stupid! You have to take care of me! I chose to call you! You cannot turn down a customer! I want care and you need to have a caregiver here by tomorrow or I will sue you!”

Me: “Ma’am, I am sorry but we can’t do that. It’s not possible. Would you like the names and numbers of companies that take Medicaid and can provide you with a home health aid?”

Client: “No, I hate companies that take Medicaid! They all suck and the caregivers don’t work!”

Me: “So, you are okay with our pricing and paying for the care yourself?”

Client: “No, you will take my insurance or get sued!”

Me: *click*

(She called back for over two hours with me hanging up on her over and over again. She complained to her doctor, who called us and talked to me about how our services work. Turned out he had recommended us to this client as she does not qualify for in home health through Medicaid and told her the reason we could provide care is because we don’t take insurance and the client would be paying for the care herself!)

Service With Surgical Precision

| USA | Bizarre, Health & Body

(I work as technical support at a large company that sells technology into multiple markets. I am following up on a voicemail left by a potential customer. From the voicemail, I know he’s looking for a specific medical product from the company’s medical division. I also know that the rights to the specific product had been sold to another company a few years ago. I dial the number he left me so that I can give him the other company’s contact information.)

Me: “Hello, this is [My Name] from technical support at [My Company]. I’m calling to follow up with a voicemail you left with us earlier today.”

Customer: “Oh, yes, I’m so glad you got back to me!”

Me: “As it turns out, [product he is interested in] is one of the products that [My Company] sold to [Other Company] a few years ago. Would you like to take down their phone number?”

Customer: “Well, actually, I can’t right now. I’m in surgery. It’s what I do for a living. But I’m sure I’ll be able to look up [Other Company]’s phone number if I search on the Internet.”

Me: “Okay, well, I hope you have a good day and that everything turns out well.”

Customer: *cheerfully* “Oh, yes, we’re just closing up the chest now. Thanks again for calling me back!”

In Praise Of Your Baggage

| Edmonton, AB, Canada | Bizarre, Health & Body

(I work in a soap company based out of Canada, and business is usually very slow. I don’t get a lot of sleep, so I have bags under my eyes. A female, middle-aged customer walks in.)

Me: “Hello, welcome to [Store]!”

Customer: “Are you wearing eyeliner?”

Me: “No, I’m not. Why do you ask?”

Customer: “It’s just unusual to see men with eyes like yours. Are you sure you don’t wear eyeliner?”

Me: “No, I’m sure those are just bags under my eyes.”

Customer: “Oh… well, they look great!”

Me: “Thank you?”

Some People Can Drive In Their Sleep

| USA | Health & Body

(I’m working an evening shift. I notice a woman in line with her mouth open and eyes closed. I stare for just a moment before thinking she may be disabled and therefore I was being rude. After a moment, one of my associates comes over to me.)

Associate: “Do you see that woman?!”

Me: “Yeah… why? What’s up?”

Associate: “She’s messed up!”

Me: “Like… uh, how?”

Associate: “Like she passed out standing up. She dozed off… I was like ‘Ma’am?’ but I didn’t know what was going on. I wanted to ask her if she was okay but I didn’t want to be rude.”

Me: “Passed out?”

Associate: “Yeah, she freaked herself out when she woke up, too. She dropped all her stuff suddenly.”

Me: “What? Wow, um, I thought maybe she was autistic or some kind of disabled. Maybe she’s narcoleptic?”

Associate: “Or on drugs. I hope she’s okay. Should I ask? Would it be rude?”

Me: “I… I don’t know.”

(She eventually gets down to me at the register. Just as my associate had described, she dozed off standing up.)

Me: *softly* “Ma’am? … Um… ma- ma’am?”

(Her eyes flicker open softly. Her mouth still hanging open, she shuffles over to me, one of her eyes opened more than the other.)

Woman: “Heeeeeey!”

(She sounds aloof rather than sick.)

Me: *trying to sound polite and cheery* “Hello, ma’am! So, what did you have today?”

Woman: “Iiit’s, uhhhhhhhh, just aaaa turkeyyyy!”

(I finish the transaction.)

Woman: “Thaaanks!”

(She walks out.)

Associate: “See?!”

Me: “Yeah… she sounded more or less fine but she definitely passed out standing up.”

Associate: *looking out the window* “And she just tripped and fell outside.”

Me: “What?”

Associate: “She got up and walked off… but, yeah, she just straight up fell outside right out the door. I hope she didn’t drive here.”

Me: “Yikes…”

Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 10

| MI, USA | Health & Body

(I am a female employee that works the front desk of a body shop. I am currently seven-months pregnant, but because of the counter height, you can’t see my belly.)

Customer: “I think there is something wrong with the undercarriage of my car. Could you take a look?”

Me: “Let me get one of our estimators to take a look. It should just be a few minutes.”

Customer: “I don’t see why I should wait a few minutes when you’re standing around doing nothing. You can look at it.”

Me: “Ma’am, I am not a qualified estimator to look at your car, and I cannot be crawling around on the ground underneath a car. It should only be a few minutes until someone is available.”

Customer: “You are just being lazy! Get me your manager NOW. This is ridiculous!”

Manager: “What’s the problem, ma’am?”

Customer: “This girl is just being lazy! She refuses to help me, I know she that she knows what she’s doing, and she just refuses to do it!”

Manager: “Well… morning sickness will do that to you.”

Customer: “What are you talking about? I just want her to look under my car!”

(I walk around the counter so the customer can see my obviously pregnant belly.)

Customer: *red face* “Well, uh, I mean, whatever. I’ll go sit in the waiting room.”

Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 9
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 8
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 7