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    Category: Geography

    You may call them “lost”, but we prefer the name “geographically disadvantaged.”

    Putting The Dire Into Directions, Part 2

    | Vancouver, BC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Geography, Transportation

    (I’m boarding passengers at a stop.)

    Passenger: “Excuse me, do you go to [street]?”

    Me: “No, ma’am, I’m going in the other direction.”

    Passenger: “Ugh! I was told that bus [number] goes to [street], but you’re the third one I’ve asked, and they all say they’re going in the opposite direction!”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am, because all of the traffic on this side of the street goes in that direction. You need to board on the other side of the street to catch buses going in that direction.”

    Passenger: “But you’re bus [number]! You should be going that direction!”

    Me: “The bus routes go both directions, ma’am. You need bus [number] eastbound, on the other side of the street. Actually, I can see it just a few blocks down right now. If you just cross here to that stop right across the street, you can catch it in just a moment.”

    Passenger: “Oh, no, no, I don’t want to go all the way to the other side. I guess I’ll just have to keep on waiting. But if the right bus doesn’t come soon, I’m going to be very annoyed!”

    Related:
    Putting The Dire Into Directions

    First Aisle Problems

    | Long Island, NY, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Geography

    (I’m a customer in line waiting to pay, when suddenly the registers freeze and have to reboot. There are two impatient customers in line behind me.)

    Employee: “Sorry, but the registers just froze. Please be patient while we reboot them.”

    Impatient Customer #1: “What did she say?”

    Impatient Customer #2: “The registers froze.”

    Impatient Customer #1: “Ugh, it’s like living in a third world country!”

    UK Needs UV

    | San Jose, CA, USA | Geography, Health & Body

    (I am working at trade show booth. I have very fair skin and often get remarks about it. I have been chatting with a fellow American customer for nearly 10 minutes.)

    Me: “Thanks so much for stopping by! I hope you enjoy the magazine. Did you have any other questions for me?”

    Customer: “No, no, thank you! Well, wait … are you British?”

    Me: “What? Ah, no… no I’m not.”

    Customer: “Really!? But…but you’re so PALE!”

    Being Franc About The Dollar

    | France | Geography, Money, Tourists/Travel

    (It is when the French Franc is still in use. I get called by a cashier who has a problem with American tourists.)

    Tourist: “This woman won’t accept our money!”

    (The tourist is waving about a wad of US dollars.)

    Me: “Well, she can’t, sir, since you’re trying to pay in US dollars.”

    Customer: “So?”

    Me: “Well, you’re in France. We only accept French Francs.”

    Customer: “I don’t understand! All the other third world countries we’ve been to accept dollars.”

    Me: “France isn’t a third world country.”

    Customer: “…”

    Me: “There’s a bank right down the street. We’ll hold on to your items until you come back with Francs. Or you can pay with a visa card.”

    Customer: “No, we’re not coming back; you’re not getting our dollars!”

    No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 6

    | Buenos Aires, Argentina | Geography

    (I work at a tech support call center that works with employees in the USA.)

    User: “…and where are you guys located?”

    Me: “Buenos Aires, Argentina.”

    User:Really? That far?”

    Me: “Yeah… it is pretty far from the US, isn’t it?”

    User: “And what’s the weather like today over there?”

    Me: “Well, it has been really cold all week. Today it was 32 F when I left home.”

    User: “And it is that cold during the summer?!”

    Me: “Um… no, actually, it’s not summer over here; it’s winter. We are all the way at the south.”

    User: “What do you mean it’s winter there? Are you serious?”

    Me: “Yes, when it’s summer in the north, it’s winter in the south of the world, and vice versa.”

    User: “For real? Are you sure?”

    Me: “Yes, very much indeed. It is winter here.”

    User: “Well… I guess you might be right.”

    (The user remains silent for a few seconds.)

    User: “But… when do you have Christmas?!”

    Related:
    No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 5
    No Aptitude Vocation For Location, Part 2
    No Aptitude For Latitude, Part 2
    No Vocation For Location
    No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 4
    No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 3
    No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 2
    No Fortitude For Longitude
    No Aptitude For Latitude


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