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    Category: Food & Drink

    Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

    Needs To Stop And Take A Minute

    , | Sydney, NSW, Australia | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Money

    (I work at a fast food chain, where most of the food just needs to be assembled on order. However, some items are rarely ordered, so we don’t prepare them since we’d have to throw them out if nobody purchases it within a certain time. It normally takes five to seven minutes to cook these items.)

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like a [food item], please.”

    Me: “Sure, that’ll be [total].”

    Customer: *hands money* “Thank you.”

    Me: “No, problem, here’s your change. Just wait over there until your order is ready.”

    (The manager comes over as I’m making drinks for the customer.)

    Manager: “Did you inform the customer that there will be a five minute wait on [food item]?”

    Me: “I wasn’t aware there was, but I’ll let him know.”

    Manager: “It’s fine. I’ll talk to him; you’re busy.” *to customer* “Excuse me, sir, did you order [food item]?”

    Customer: *irritated* “Yeah, what’s the problem?”

    Manager: “We have to make that item fresh, so it’ll be about five minutes. Is that alright?”

    Customer: “No, it’s not f****** alright! You should have told me earlier. Now I don’t f****** want it!”

    Manager: “I’m sorry, sir. I told you as soon as I found out. If you like, I can offer you a refund, or you can have something else.”

    Customer: “F****** h***. Can’t you do anything right?! I’m not going to f****** wait for my d*** food.”

    Manager: “I’m sorry, sir; it’s not my fault. I’ve given you the option of getting a refund if you’d like one.”

    Cook: *yells to manager* “The [food item] is ready!”

    Manager: “I’m really sorry about the wait, sir, but your food is ready! Would you like it?”

    Customer: “No, just give me my f****** money back.”

    Manager: “It’s ready though. Wouldn’t you rather—”

    Customer: “I want my f****** money! This has been terrible service with your f****** smug tone and inconsiderate attitude. You think you’re better then me and can just f****** act that way!”

    Manager: “I’m sorry you feel that way; have a nice day.”

    Customer: “Yeah, yeah, f*** you.” *stomps out with his money*

    Manager: *to me* “I’m going for a smoke.”

    A Drink Of Fire And Ice

    | TX, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    Me: “Would you like your drink hot or iced today, sir?”

    Customer: “Hmm?”

    Me: “You have the option of having your drink hot or over ice.”

    Customer: “What?”

    Me: “Do you want your drink iced or hot?”

    Customer: “I don’t know what that means.”

    Have Your Cake And Eat It

    | Canada | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Top

    (I am working the counter at a bakery. An older customer comes up to order.)

    Customer: “Hi, can I get a chocolate croissant and red velvet cupcake please?”

    Me: “Oh, good choices! The red velvet cupcake is my favorite. I was actually going to get one on my break.”

    (I go to grab his order, and realize there’s only one cupcake left.)

    Me: “Lucky you, you got the last one!”

    Customer: “Oh… are you sure you don’t want it? I can get something else.”

    Me: “It’s okay, sir; that’s just the luck of the draw I guess.”

    (He reluctantly accepts. Once he pays for his food, he takes the cupcake and puts in on the counter.)

    Customer: “For you, my dear.”

    Me: “What? No sir, it’s really okay. I can always get one tomorrow!”

    Customer: “Well, I’m leaving it on the counter and walking away. What you do with it is up to you. Have a good day!”

    (True to his word, he leaves the store. I have to say it was the best cupcake I ever had!)

    In-Sip-Id Conversations

    | Birmingham, AL, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I’ve just made some drinks for a group of older customers. I call out one of the drinks. One of the customers comes over and picks up the cup.)

    Customer: “Is this my drink?”

    Me: “I don’t know, ma’am. Did you have the [drink name]?”

    Customer: “I don’t know… I think so.”

    (She walks away with the drink; about a minute passes before she returns.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, but I have a dumb question.”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am?”

    Customer: “I just want to know: how many sips do I have to take before I get to the coffee?”

    Me: “…What?”

    Customer: “Well, I’ve been sipping on this for a little bit and I still haven’t tasted coffee.”

    Me: “Well, there’s whipped cream on top… I can scoop it off for you if you’d like.”

    Customer: “Oh, no. I just wanted to know!”

    The Cake Buyer Is A Lie

    | MI, USA | Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers, Money

    (I work in the deli right beside the bakery. I witness an exchange between a customer and the bakery supervisor.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, I need to pick up a cake order. It should be under [name].”

    Supervisor: “Sure, let me go get it.”

    (She goes into the cooler to retrieve the cake, and brings it out to the customer.)

    Supervisor: “Okay, ma’am. Here it is.”

    Customer: “Oh, by the way, I already paid for the cake when I ordered it. So I can just walk out with it, right?”

    Supervisor: “Well, I don’t see a receipt with your order slip ma’am. Do you happen to have one with you? We usually ask for the receipt to be returned to us so that we know you paid for it.”

    Customer: “No! No one told me that I had to do that! But I already paid for it!”

    Supervisor: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but everyone who works here knows that we always ask for a receipt to be returned to us. If you don’t have a receipt, I’m afraid you’re going to have to pay for this now.”

    Customer: “I told you that I already paid for this cake!”

    (The customer waves a slip of paper in the air.)

    Customer: “I HAVE THIS! I HAVE THIS!”

    Supervisor: “Ma’am, that paper you’re waving around just means we took your order. It does not mean that you paid for it.”

    Customer: “I HAVE THIS! I HAVE THIS! IT SHOULD BE GOOD ENOUGH!”

    Supervisor: “That slip of paper just means you placed an order with us. It doesn’t prove that you already paid for your cake. Anyone who places an order with us could bring that slip of paper back, lie and say they already paid for their order. I’m not saying that’s what you’re doing, but I can’t just let you leave with this cake without proof of purchasing it.”

    Customer: *leaves in a huff without the cake*

    Related:
    The Cake Is A Lie, Part 4
    The Cake Is A Lie, Part 3
    The Cake Is A Lie, Part 2

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