October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

We Love To Deep Dish On Bad Customers

| UT, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month, Time

(It is five minutes to closing at our store when the phone rings. Policy requires that we answer until 11:30 during winter hours. I pick up and my friend and manager stands behind me.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [store location]. What can I do for you tonight?”

Customer: “I need two pan pizzas with sausage and pepperoni.”

(I put the order in on the computer and look to the clock. It is now three minutes to close.)

Me: “All right, sir. I’m going to have to put this in for carry-out, as we close in three minutes.”

Customer: “Uh, no. I want it for delivery.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t do that. We close at 11:30.”

Customer: “Well the internet says you close at midnight. I want delivery.”

Me: “Again, I can’t do that. We have cleanup to do, and we close in one minute. We are also on the winter schedule, and close a half hour earlier than summer hours.”

Customer: “That’s f***ing stupid!”

Me: “Sir, I’m sorry, but I can’t have you speak to me that way. If you like, you can speak to my manager about it. She’s standing right here, and has heard this entire conversation.”

(He settles down. It is now after 11:30.)

Customer: “Can’t you call it carry-out and just bring it to me?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “Can I send you a picture of the web page?”

Me: “You can, but it won’t make a difference. This is policy, sir.”

Customer: “Fine! F*** you!”

(He hangs up. I smile and put the phone down.)

Manager: “He was pleasant.”

Me: “I love people like that.”

Manager: “Why?”

Me: “They give me stories to tell.”

This Boss Gets More Than Just The Check

| New Orleans, LA, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Top

(A young gay couple has become my favorite regulars at the small restaurant where I work. One day as I am talking with them, an older, more conservative-looking man walks past us to the To-Go pickup area. He stops short next to us, and in the same moment, I see one of the young guys look down with a panicked expression at where he is holding his boyfriend’s hand.)

Older Man: “James! I didn’t know you ate here!”

James: *uncomfortable* “Oh yeah, um… it’s half way between work and my… boyfriend’s work, so.”

Older Man: *glances at James’ boyfriend* “Oh.”

(There is an awkward pause, where we all just stare at each other.)

Older Man: “I’m sorry, I’m being rude.” *offers his hand to James’ boyfriend* “I’m Mike, James’s boss. Very nice to meet you. We all love James in the office.”

James’ Boyfriend: “Oh! Nice to meet you too! You know, James is always talking about how much he looks up to you.”

(James is so visibly relieved that he is near tears. The three makes some more small talk before the older man heads off to pick up his lunch. I end up taking his payment and he quietly asks me to pay for James and his boyfriend’s meal as well.)

Older Man: “You know… when I was growing up, I was taught that being gay was bad, a sin. But that young man is the brightest kid I’ve ever known, and I can’t see a d*** thing wrong with him…” *pauses* “…or his boyfriend.”

(He smiles at me and then walks away without another word. To this day, I can’t think about the look on James’s face when I told him that his boss paid for his nearly $100 meal without wanting to cry.)

He’s One Slice Short Of A Pie

, | Grand Rapids, MN, USA | Bad Behavior, Bizarre, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

(I have returned from delivering a pizza to the last customer of the night. Upon returning to the store, it is after closing time, so we begin cleaning and closing the store. The phone rings; we normally don’t answer the phone after closing time, but since I recognized the name on the caller ID as my last delivery, I decide to answer it.)

Me: “Thanks for calling [restaurant]. I’m sorry we’re closed, but how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I just had a pizza delivered and there’s a problem.”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that. What is the problem, exactly?”

Customer: “Well, this has got to be some sort of joke or something.”

Me: “Okay, what is the problem?”

Customer: “I just sat down to eat my sausage pizza, and 7 of the 8 pieces are just fine, but the 8th piece doesn’t have any sausage on it.”

Me: “I’m sorry, that shouldn’t have happened. How about I give you a $2 discount on your next purchase?”

Customer: “Sure.”

Me: “Okay, sorry again. Have a nice night.”

(Before I can even turn around to walk away, the same caller ID rings again, so I answer.)

Customer: *yelling very angrily* “I’m so mad right now! I can’t believe what I’m looking at! What, are you messing with me not putting sausage on one of the pieces of my pizza?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, it was an accident. Sausages are small and round, I’m sure after they were put on the pizza they rolled around when the cheese was applied. How about instead of a $2 discount, I mark you account for a free pizza on your next order? Would that fix it for you?”

Customer: *calm now* “Yeah, that would be great, thanks.”

(We once again finish the call and hang up. Again before I can turn around the phone rings with the same caller ID so I answer and greet the caller.)

Customer: “YOU MUST BE PLAYING A JOKE ON ME! This must have been done on purpose! I’m gonna come down there and cut your heads off!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir! I just wanted to remind you that you’ll get a free pizza on your next order. Is that okay?”

Customer: *calms down again* “Yeah, thanks.”

(I quickly got off the phone while he was calm. We then quickly locked up and went home for the night without cleaning up the store, in case he was truly coming down to cut our heads off.)

A Free Cup Of Kindness

| Redondo Beach, CA, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Top

(I am having a pretty rough time, and I am not looking forward to work. I work in a small taco shack near the beach. My customers are often inexplicably rude, with a few exceptions. A girl walks up to the counter, and before I can ask what she wants to order she grins at me. Her smile is so genuine, I’m speechless.)

Girl: “How are you today?”

(I’m really surprised at this point.)

Me: “I’m, uh, I’m pretty good, thank you.”

Girl: “Oh, that’s good.” *smiles again*

Me: “Thank you… uh, what can I get you?”

Girl: “Oh, hmm… can I have a chicken taco and small drink, please?”

Me: “Sure, that will be 4.95.”

Girl: *digs through her purse* “I only have $4.02. Can I take off the drink, please?”

Me: “Oh yeah, sure.”

(I hand her the receipt and a empty drink cup.)

Girl: *surprised* “Wait, I asked to take the drink off.”

Me: “I did. You made my day a whole lot better just by asking how I was and giving me a smile. Least I can do is buy you a drink!”

(She thanks me and gives me her prettiest smile yet before walking away. People should realize the difference a smile can make. It can change an employee’s whole day!)

Better Make It A Double

| Ipswich, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month, Top, Underaged

(I am working in a pub, and my sister, my identical twin, has come in to say hello during a busy period. She has queued, and I have served her an alcoholic drink. I am just handing it over when this conversation starts.)

Customer: “You didn’t check the ID of this girl. She doesn’t look old enough to drink. I demand you check her ID!”

Me: “I am sorry, sir, but I can assure you that she is old enough to drink.”

Customer: “She is only about 12! She is nowhere old enough to drink. I will call the police if you do not check her ID!”

Me: “Sir, she is old enough to drink. She is my sister, and I can assure you that she is 20 years old.”

Customer: “If you won’t check her ID, I am going to call the police!”

(The customer takes his phone out and makes a show of dialing. My sister looks embarrassed, but pays for her drink, shows me her driving license as she does look young, and takes a seat at the bar.)

Me: “See? My sister is old enough to drink.”

Customer: “No! You’re breaking the law!” *to everyone around us* “She’s breaking the law!”

(Hearing the commotion, security comes.)

Security: “What is the trouble, sir?”

Customer: “That girl has served a drink to an underage customer! She used a fake ID; I saw her!”

Security: “Sir, can’t you see the resemblance? The girl serving you is the identical twin of this customer. If she is old enough to serve you drinks, her twin is old enough to drink, too.”

Customer: *muttering* “Well… she doesn’t look as old as she does!” *leaves*

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