October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

Closing Down But Lifting Up

| Milwaukee, WI, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month, Top

(The company I work for is going out of business, and it is my final day working. I’ve been chatting with a customer about how hard finding a new job is as I ring her up.)

Customer: “Well, thank you. We’re off to Starbucks now.”

Me: “Oh, I love Starbucks.”

Customer: “Really? Would you like me to bring you something?”

Me: “I… what?”

Customer: “Yeah, what would you like? I have a gift card so it’s not a problem.”

Me: “The closest one is fifteen minutes away.”

Customer: “I know. What would you like?”

Me: “Um… a caramel mocha?”

Customer: “Grande or venti?”

Me: “A… grande is good. Thank you.”

Customer: “It’s not a problem. Caramel mocha. I’ll be back with it soon.”

(True to her word, she was back later with the coffee. I’ve not had any luck in the job search yet, but her bringing me a free coffee on my last day really made me smile.)

A Weebly Weird Conversation

, , | ON, Canada | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Musical Mayhem

(I am waiting in line at a fast food restaurant. The couple behind me, who looks to be in their late twenties, are discussing their orders.)

Guy: “Have you tried the bacon, mushroom and Swiss cheese burger?”

Girl: “Yeah, it wasn’t bad, but I’m not a huge fan of mushrooms.”

Guy: *starts singing super quietly* “Mushroom! Mushroom!”

Girl: *also super quietly* “It’s a snake! A snaaaaaake! A snaaaaake!”

Both: “Badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger!”

(They then go back to their conversation about various menu items, completely normal.)

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 2

| Henderson, SC, USA | Awesome Customers, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Health & Body, Top

(I am out to breakfast with some friends from work.)

Me: “Excuse me, do you know if the cook uses milk to make the omelets or just eggs?”

Waitress: “Just eggs. Are you allergic to milk?”

Me: “No, but I am lactose intolerant and I forgot to bring my meds.”

(We all order our food. However, after the waitress leaves, I overhear someone from the table next to us asking for a manager.)

Another Customer: *loudly* “I want to complain about that waitress. I heard her interrogating that poor woman about her personal medical issues! I’m a doctor and I know you can’t just ask people about things like that! It’s against the law! She could sue you!”

Me: *to the other customer* “Excuse me, before things get out of hand here, I’m the person she’s talking about. First of all, our waitress asked if I had an allergy to milk. It was a good question considering I made a point of asking if some of your foods have milk in it. If I was really allergic, the kitchen would have to take extra precautions to avoid anaphylaxis. Secondly, there’s no such law that I know of unless you’re talking about the laws in place to protect your private health information from being accessed by other people without your permission. I don’t see how those would apply in this case.”

Another Customer: “What the h*** are you talking about? What are you, some kind of lawyer, smarta**?”

My Friend: “No, ‘doctor,’ she’s some kind of nurse.”

(We all pulled out our hospital IDs. The “doctor” shut up after that. The manager thanked us for clearing things up and left, and our waitress gave us a free round of cheesecake with a free lactose-free muffin for me!)

Why Nurses Should Rule The World

Demanding Bacon And Acting Like A Pig

, | Adelaide, SA, Australia | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Wild & Unruly

(I am working drive-thru just before close, and my dad and little sisters are waiting in the dining room for me to finish. My brother also works with me. A customer pulls up; I notice him and his friends are all drinking alcohol.)

Customer: “Can I please have a burger with bacon?”

Me: “Sure, that will be [price].”

(Customer pays and drives to the last window, which I let the manager know over the headset he is drinking and may want to inform the police. As this is my last car, I go and get changed and head home. I walk past the drive-thru window and start to head to the dining room.)

Customer: “Oi! You! I said I wanted f***ing bacon!”

(Clearly intoxicated, he gets out of his car and JUMPS through the drive-thru window with his beer and burger, where my manager and brother try and grab him. He smashes the beer over my manager’s head and into the fry station. My dad quickly calls the police and ambulance and grabs the guy. His friends drive off leaving him there, with my dad holding him down. Meanwhile, the manager has recovered and walks over to my dad.)

Manager: “Thanks, mate! You can have a free meal for your whole family next time you’re in here!”

Bright Makes Right

, | WI, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Top

(I am the drive-thru cashier on a slow day. Most of the few customers that have come through have been unpleasant or downright rude. During the early afternoon, a very cheerful customer comes through.)

Me: “Welcome to [store name]. What can we make for you today?”

Customer: “Hi! How are you today?”

Me: “I’m doing alright, thanks. You?”

Customer: “Wonderful! Can I have two waters and a [dessert item]?”

Me: “Alright, that’s [total] and I’ll see you at the window.”

(When the car pulls up, I see two teenage girls, both with big smiles on their faces. I hand them their water and take their money before handing them their treat. Before handing the treat out, the passenger leans forward and speaks up loud enough for the entire kitchen to hear.)

Passenger: “That’s for you guys, on us! Friend told us y’all were having a bad day; we wanted to cheer you up! Have a great day!”

(It worked! It totally made my whole day so much better!)

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