Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Crime Can Be A Vicious Cycle
    (1,815 thumbs up)
  • October Theme Of The Month: Coupon Complications!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Food & Drink

    Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

    Where There’s Smoke, There’s A Liar

    | Sacramento , CA, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Food & Drink, Underaged

    (Keep in mind I work in a yogurt shop and we only sell yogurt and candy. An obviously underage customer comes up to be rung up.)

    Me: “Is that going to be it for you today?”

    Customer: “Yeah, can I get a pack of cigarettes too?”

    Me: “This is a yogurt shop, sir.”

    Customer: “I have my ID though!”

    Me: “This is a yogurt shop. Not only do we not sell cigarettes, but I’m pretty sure it’s illegal to accept a fake ID.”

    Customer: *storms out muttering obscenities*

    The Ire Of The Irish

    | Maryland, USA | Food & Drink, Geography

    (I’m Irish and am working in the States one summer, waiting tables at an Irish pub/restaurant. I’m serving a couple in their 30s.)

    Customer: “Where are you from?”

    Me: “I’m from Ireland.”

    Customer: “Where’s that?”

    Me: “It’s in Europe.”

    Customer: “Oh, you’re from another country! Your English is really good!”

    Burnt To Order

    | San Jose, CA, USA | Food & Drink

    Me: “And would you like white toast with that?”

    Customer: “No, I want black toast.”

    Me: “I don’t…I don’t think that exists, sir.”

    Customer: “BLACK TOAST.”

    Me: “Wheat it is, then, sir.”

    Bananas Explodé

    | Brussels, Belgium | Food & Drink

    (I’m preparing bananas flambé in front of several customers. Suddenly, one of them speaks up excitedly.)

    Customer: “Wow, that looks so cool! Are you using gasoline?”

    Buy One Euphemism, Get The Second One Free

    | Vermont, USA | Food & Drink, Rude & Risque, Top

    (I’m a rather busty female and I work in a grocery store. An elderly man walks up to my register with his cart.)

    Customer: “Well, I see you got new jugs!”

    Me: “Excuse me?”

    Customer: “New jugs. I quite like ‘em. Better grip. Oh, yeah, much better grip.”

    Me: *stares wide-eyed*

    Customer: *places two bottles of prune juice on the counter*

    Me: *relieved* “Oh, yes. They redid the bottles on those. New jugs.”

    Customer: “Mmmm. Prune juice. I quite like it. Keeps me regular.”

    Page 186/251First...184185186187188...Last