October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

The Four Pillars Of Bad Behavior

| Ottawa, ON, Canada | Awesome Workers, Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Food & Drink, Top

(I work in a poutine place downtown; we stay open until 4 am on weekends due to the nightlife. We never usually have an issue with drunk people.)

Coworker: “I’m sorry; we do not accept credit. Do you have another method of payment?”

Customer: “I will have you know I am the f****** niece of the owner, and he will have you all fired!”

Coworker: “Unfortunately, that does not address the issue at hand.”

Customer: “You f****** f**!”

(She continues to throw insults at my coworker, telling him to go back to Africa, despite him being Caucasian. He maintains his composure.)

Customer: “F*** you, just let me pay for my f****** food!”

(I am right around the corner, and am an African-American female. I decide to intervene.)

Me: “[Coworker] seems to have a lot more patience for your crap than I do. Our machines do not recognize credit cards, and that fact is completely irrelevant to his orientation. Moreover, the owner’s only brother isn’t even 30, and therefore cannot biologically have a daughter in her 20s. And that stuff about going back to Africa? You can take that up with me. Have a nice night!”

(The customer falls silent. The crowd parts as she exits the store.)

Coworker: “Wow, remind me not to p*** you off!”

Me: “Don’t worry; you won’t be seeing that again. It’s one thing to be so disrespectful, another to be a compulsive liar, another to be homophobic, and another to be racist. She needed a talking to!”

(All the customers who witness the incident tip us really well for dealing with her!)

Reading Aloud Shouldn’t Be Allowed

| Chicago, IL, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Top

Customer: “I’d like to buy a dozen donuts.”

Me: “Sure! What kind would you like?”

Customer: “What kind do you have?”

Me: “Sir, all of our donuts are on display behind me, with labels in front of them. You can have a look, and tell me what you would like.”

Customer: “I can read! I want you to tell me what kind of donuts you sell! That’s your job!”

(I turn around, and proceed to read each label aloud. My coworker at the ice cream counter watches and snickers. The man waits until I have read every label, and then makes his selections.)

Me: “Will that be all?”

Customer: “Do you have muffins?”

(I gesture to the shelves full of muffins.)

Me: “Yes, we have a variety of muffins.”

Customer: “What kind?”

(My coworker chokes with laughter. I turn around again, and read the muffin labels. When I finish, the man selects two muffins.)

Me: “Will that be all?”

Customer: “I think I’ll have some ice cream, too.”

Me: “Okay! I’ll ring up your items here, and then you can go and make your selections at the ice cream counter.”

(The man completes his order, then goes over to the ice cream section. My coworker is still giggling with his back to the counter, and hasn’t seen the customer yet.)

Customer: “What kind of ice cream do you have?”

Coworker: *stops giggling*

The Race(ist) For The Last Chicken

| Preston, England, UK | Bigotry, Food & Drink

(I work late shifts, and mark down items to their final reduction.)

Customer: “Have you not got any more cheap chicken?”

Me: “No, sir, the lady just over there took our last pack, unfortunately.”

(I gesture towards a small, lovely, Indian lady, who had come by and picked up some chicken breasts I just marked down.)

Customer: “I’m not racist, but f****** p**** are always turning up and taking all the good stuff early! You can never stay one step ahead of them d*** foreigners!”

Me: “Well, we have a first come, first served policy. Regardless of who she is, she was here first.”

Customer: “Yeah, but you know what I mean! They come over here, and take everything for granted. They do what they f****** like, and take our cheap food! You follow me, don’t ya’?”

Me: “Well, no, I don’t. Like I said, we have a first come, first served policy. We also have a policy against incendiary language, and I’m going to have to ask you to leave. Here’s a little hint for you; when you say “I’m not racist, but—”, it usually means you’re about to be racist. The exit’s third on the left.”

A Hot Slice Of Kindness

| Boston, MA, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink

(I am working at a pizza shop on a busy Friday night. There are about five customers waiting in line. I hand the first customer her slice, and move on.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I don’t like the slice I ordered. I want a new one.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am; but I can’t just give you another slice.”

Customer: “But I don’t want this one anymore! I demand to speak to who is in charge. How am I supposed to eat something I don’t like?!”

(I ask my boss, and he tells me to give her a free slice to avoid an argument. I get the customer a new slice, and am finally able to take care of the other customers. An hour later, my coworker hands me a hot chocolate.)

Coworker: “Here, this hot chocolate is for you.”

Me: “Oh, thanks!”

Coworker: “I didn’t get it; one of the customers who was in here before works at the coffee place. He saw you deal with that difficult customer, so he brought you the hot chocolate for free.”

(This small act of kindness made my entire night brighter. The next time I see him, he will be getting a free slice of pizza!)

Her Behavior Is Out Of Order

| USA | Food & Drink

(We take all our orders verbally, sometimes faster than we can actually make the sandwiches. Most people just continue down the line after ordering, but some people insist on watching their sandwich get put into the oven. This can cause confusion for them when they don’t realize that we’re taking their order before we’re done with the sandwich before theirs.)

Customer: “I’ll have a large turkey.”

Coworker: “White or wheat bread?”

Customer: “White bread.”

(At this point, my coworker finishes the sandwich before hers and places it in the oven. It happens to be a small turkey on wheat.)

Customer: “Oh, my God. How hard can it possibly be?! I asked for a large turkey, and that’s not even white bread! Are you even listening?!”

Coworker: “I certainly am, ma’am. You wanted a large turkey on white bread. The customer before you happened to want a small turkey on wheat bread. That sandwich is his.”

(I hold up the large turkey on white bread.)

Coworker: “This sandwich is yours. I am now putting your sandwich into the oven, after the customer before you.”

(The customer happened to be accompanied by her daughter, who actually burst into laughter. The woman said nothing through the rest of the line.)

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