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    Category: Food & Drink

    Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

    Some Sprinkles Come With Sergeants

    | CA, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Military, Top

    (At the restaurant where I work, my boyfriend is visiting me. He’s just gotten home from the army and is still in uniform. A customer approaches me.)

    Customer: *points at sprinkles* “Excuse me, there is ice in my ice cream!”

    Me: “Sir, those are sprinkles. You asked for rainbow sprinkles.”

    Customer: “They are too cold to be sprinkles, so they must be ice!”

    Me: “The ice cream is what’s making them cold, sir.”

    Customer: “You’re a liar, you b****! Get me your f***ing manager!”

    (Unwilling to take the customer’s abusive behavior, my boyfriend speaks up.)

    My Boyfriend: “Those are f***ing sprinkles, you a**hole! If you don’t like it, then just go home and make your own ice cream!”

    Customer: *quickly exits the restaurant*

    Manager: *to my boyfriend* “You should stop by more often! I’ll even pay you to handle these customers!”

    All You Can Elite

    | New Zealand | Food & Drink

    (I am a server at a buffet-style restaurant. Since the customers get the food themselves, I am there to seat them, clear their plates and assist with any problems.)

    Me: “Hi, welcome to [restaurant's name]. If you will please follow me, I’ll show you to your table.”

    (I take the family of four to their table and point out where to get plates and cutlery from as well as show them the general layout of the buffet.)

    Customer: “So, I’ll have the roast, some potato salad, and a coke.”

    Me: “Uh, sir, this is a buffet restaurant.”

    Customer: “Yeah, so?”

    Me: “There is no menu. You go to the buffet choose the food yourself. That’s the point of a buffet.”

    Customer: “Oh, I know. I just can’t be bothered waiting in that horrendous line!”

    Bigotry Gets Served

    , | Boca Raton, FL, USA | Awesome Customers, Bigotry, Food & Drink, Top

    (I’m a customer standing in line behind another customer at a Mexican fast-food restaurant.)

    Cashier: “How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “Excuse me, but you gay?”

    Cashier: “Um…I mean…yeah, but I don’t see what that—”

    Customer: *menacing* “I’m gonna need you to leave this here store, so a good Christian can take my order. Got that?!”

    (The manager has overheard all this and walks over.)

    Manager: “I’m sorry, sir, but you’re going to have to leave.”

    Customer: “Are you discriminating on me ’cause I’m a Christian?”

    Manager: “No, sir, I am not. I am also a Christian.”

    Customer: “And you, a claimed Christian, hired this sodomite?”

    Manager: “I hired this man because he does his job extremely well and is a good employee.”

    Customer: “But he’s a sodomite!”

    Manager: “You need to leave, now.”

    Customer: “I ain’t leavin ’til I get my here IMMIGRANT food from a good Christian!”

    (Fed up, hungry, and in a rush, I speak up.)

    Me: “If you’ll excuse me, sir, I’m in too much of a rush to deal with your bulls***. Since you’re being kicked out, I’m going to give my order to the nice cashier over here. You can also go ahead and get something for yourself on my tab, because no one should have to put up with you!”

    (The four other customers behind me clapped, while the customer screamed, “YOU’RE ALL HEATHENS!” and ran out like he was being chased by Satan. On top of that, I got my order on the house!)

    This Sale Has No Future

    | Bensalem, PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Time

    (Note: It is a Sunday afternoon.)

    Customer: “How much is a bag of mussels?”

    Me: “They’re $2.99.”

    Customer: “Are they on sale?”

    Me: “Yes, they are.”

    Customer: “How long are they going to be on sale?”

    Me: “They’re on sale until Saturday.”

    Customer: “So, do you mean next Saturday, or yesterday?”

    Flaws And Effect

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Food & Drink, Top

    (We used to have a candy topping for a certain holiday drink. It was discontinued because people found it unpleasant. One customer went as far as to claim that a barista “must have dropped fried rice from their lunch into the drink”. There had been a minor incident over it, and the customer was outraged. This takes place the following year in the drive-thru.)

    Coworker: “Hi, here’s your latte! Have a nice night.”

    Customer: “Where’s the candied ginger from last year? I only ordered this because I wanted the ginger. I’m not going to enjoy my drink as much now!”

    Coworker: “Well, we don’t use it any more because people didn’t like it. Someone even insisted there was rice in their drink! Isn’t that kind of funny?”

    Customer: “Oh yes…I remember. Uh…that was me, actually.” *drives away sheepishly*

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