Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

Full Of Holiday Sneer

| Washington, DC, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Money, Theme Of The Month

(I am a customer at a convenience store buying coffee. Since the holidays are very near, I want to do something nice. There is an older gentleman behind me, about 65 years old, with two cups of coffee.)

Me: *to the cashier* “I’ll pay for his, too.”

Cashier: *smiles* “Okay, that’ll be $[price].”

(I pay, and then the man walks up to pay.)

Cashier: “It was taken care of, sir.”

Man: “No, no, no, why? Here, I need to pay for this.”

Me: “I got it for you. Happy holidays!”

Man: *scowls* “Who do you think you are, some kind of good Samaritan? I can buy my own coffee.”

Me: “…I guess I was only trying to be nice…”

Man: “Well, I don’t want it!”

Children Of The Candy Corn

| Kansas City, MO, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I notice a mother has three children with her; the youngest (and only boy) is about eleven. As I am ringing up her groceries, the boy is looking at a rather large bag of candy on the belt.)

Me: “Did you find everything alright today ma’am?”

Customer’s Son: “Mom! Get me some candy!”

(As he says this, the son starts grabbing candy bars from a display and puts them on the belt.)

Customer: “I already bought you a bag of candy.”

Customer’s Son: “I WANT SOME CANDY!”

Me: “Sorry, your mother said you couldn’t have any.”

Customer’s Son: “Shut up!”

(I ignore him and as the candy comes down the belt, I take it off, intending to put it back. However, the son sees me do this.)

Customer’s Son: “Hey! Stop that! I want that candy!” *turns to his mother* “Make her stop! Make her give me the candy!”

Customer: “I just bought you a big bag of candy!”

(This exchange goes on for a while, and finally the mother caves and I reluctantly ring up the candy. I begin to bag it as the boy goes through the bags, grabbing the large bag of candy, hugging it to his chest, and running out of the store.)

Me: “I normally don’t give opinions on kids, but he could have at least helped you carry out the bags.”

Customer: “Oh, he’s the only boy in our family. We have to spoil him and he knows it!” *leaves*

Hopefully, That’ll Be The End Of That Customer

| MD, USA | Awesome Customers, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

Customer #1: “I hope this is better than last time! My last ham was salty and had too much fat!”

Me: “I’m sorry about that. We do have a guarantee on flavor, so if you—”

Customer #1: “Never mind, it was a while ago. I want a 10 pound shank.”

Me: “Okay, let me get one.”

(I pull a ham about that size from the refrigerator, put it on the counter in front of her and unwrap the foil.)

Customer #1: “No! No! That has way too much fat! See right there!”

(I look down at where she is pointing and note it is a normal deposit found in all hams. I decide it’s not worth arguing.)

Me: “Okay, let me get another.”

(I do so, but she’s still not satisfied.)

Customer #1: “No, that’s not any good either! It has too much fat!”

(This repeats several times, as I show her a total of nine other ham shanks, all of which, predictably, have the same small fat deposit. I’m literally running out of hams to show her. Customer #2, a man standing behind her in line, has been quiet but has been getting increasingly agitated.)

Customer #1: “What is with this place! All these hams have fat!”

(Customer #2 finally snaps.)

Customer #2: “Of course it has fat, you moron! It’s a pig’s a** cheek!”

Customer #1: *stunned* “It is?”

Customer #2: “Yes! He’ll tell you!” *points at me*

Me: “Well yes, ham comes from the, uh, hind end of a pig.”

Customer #1: “Oh my God, that’s disgusting! I’m never buying this again!”

(She storms out, and Customer #2 steps up to the counter.)

Customer #2: “Finally. One 12-pound pig a** cheek, please.”

Crying Over No Spilt Milk

| Detroit, MI, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I work in a convenience store, and am calling to make a dairy order.)

Me: “Hi, this is [store] calling. I’d like to place my order.”

Rep: “Sure! Whenever you’re ready.”

Me: “I’ll take 15 ‘2%’, 5 whole, 2 skim—”

Rep: “I’m very sorry; can you hold on just one moment?”

Me: “Sure, take your time.”

(The rep puts me on hold for a few moments before returning.)

Rep: “I’m very sorry about that. I had this guy on another line screaming at me about how he didn’t get his Pepsi order. It took me a few minutes to finally get a word in and to let him know that he had called the dairy company.”

Me: *laughing* “Are you serious?”

Rep: “Yes! I’ve never had that happen to me! Haha! Okay, I can take the rest of your order now!”

It Isn’t The View That Is Spoiled

| Ventura, CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I work as a hostess in a very popular family restaurant. We have a playground on the patio as well as one of the best locations in town with a view over looking the ocean. Today we have a party of 100 fundraising for a youth football team, so there are a lot of kids.)

Customer: “Two, for outside please.”

Me: “I’m sorry, the patio is reserved for a party.”

(The customer is sat by the window with a lovely view of the ocean.)

Customer: “Excuse me? But you wouldn’t let us sit outside! And now those ugly kids are playing in my view! Make them move!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but they are part of the large party and I can’t ask them to leave.”

Customer: “Are you serious?”

Me: “Ma’am, I really don’t like kids either, but this is a family restaurant and family means kids.”

Customer: “I’m never coming here again!”

Page 171/300First...169170171172173...Last