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  • August Theme Of The Month: Best. Customer. Ever!

    Category: Food & Drink

    Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

    Needs A Slice Of Common Sense

    | Australia | Food & Drink

    (I work in a location of a popular bakery chain. Occasionally, we have a customer who comes to us trying to get bread that was bought outside of our store sliced by us. We can’t allow that because of food safety concerns. I have just finished up with a lady and am putting her money in the till when a customer tries to flag my attention before the other customers.)

    Me: “One second, ma’am.”

    (The customer huff impatiently and I put away the money. I smile at her to show her she has my attention.)

    Me: “How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “Finally. Well, I bought this loaf and I forgot to get it cut, you see, and I was wondering if you could just throw it in your slicer there.”

    (I assume she is a customer we had just served in our rush who has come back, before I notice that the loaf actually belongs to another popular bakery chain.)

    Me: “Oh ma’am, I’m sorry, but I can’t take your bread.”

    Customer: “I just want it sliced. I don’t care how you do it.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but I really can’t do that. It’s a safety issue. I mean, I don’t think that you or the bakery has put anything in the bread, but we just can’t take the chance.”

    Customer: “But it’s your bread!”

    Me: “Actually, it comes from [other popular bakery chain].”

    Customer: “Yes!” *explaining it slowly* “And you’re all part of the same company.”

    Me: “Actually that’s not quite true, you see—”

    Customer: “Look, are you going to slice this bread or not?!”

    (I look at my supervisor, who shakes her head.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t.”

    Customer: “Fine! Well I guess I won’t buying anything from here again!” *storms off with her unsliced bread*

    Supervisor: “You didn’t buy anything from us to begin with!”

    WTF Is OFD?

    | WI, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

    (I work at an ice cream/grill chain store in a small town. I’m training in a new cashier when one of our regulars comes in.)

    Regular: “I want my usual.”

    Trainee: “I’m sorry?”

    Regular: “My usual. You know, with the OFD.”

    Trainee: “The what?”

    (He repeats the request a couple more times, getting ruder. I decide to intervene and introduce the trainee to our customer.)

    Regular: “Oh! You mean you aren’t [Another Coworker]? I want the chicken basket with the OFD.”

    (We have half a dozen combos that that could describe, so I ring the order in over the trainee’s shoulder. The customer gets the senior discount and sits in his usual spot without taking a number.)

    Trainee: “What’s an OFD?”

    Me: “Old fart’s discount.”

    A Very Taxing Customer

    | GA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Money

    Cashier: “Okay your total is $8.57.”

    Customer: “Whoa, hang on a second; the menu board says the meal is $8.26.”

    Cashier: “Yes, the extra is the sales tax.”

    Customer: “No, no, that’s bull-s***. You guys are lying on your advertisements. Why don’t you list the real price?”

    Me: “Well, sir, the prices are set by corporate. Most businesses don’t include the tax because it varies by location. The tax added in one state is different than another.”

    Customer: “Whatever, that is still crap. Here.” *hands over $8.26*

    Cashier: “Okay, sir you still owe 31 cents.”

    Customer: “No, I just told you I will NOT pay the tax on it.”

    Me: “Sir, we cannot complete the transaction until you pay the remainder.”

    Customer: “But why should I have to pay more than is listed?”

    Me: “The sales taxes are what the state of Georgia says they are. I don’t have control over that.”

    Customer: “Whatever.”

    (The customer walks off leaving his $8.26 on the counter. We put it to the side and continue with the next customers in line. About 10 minutes later he walks up to the counter again.)

    Customer: “Have y’all called my name yet; is my sandwich ready?”

    Me: “Sir, we never processed your order.”

    Customer: “WHAT? I HAVE BEEN WAITING HERE FOR 10 MINUTES!”

    Me: “Sir, you never paid for the order.”

    Customer: “Yes, I did! I gave the cashier $8.26!”

    Me: “Yes, but as I explained to you, you owed 31 cents and didn’t pay it. Your money is over here if you want it, or if you want to pay the 31 cents we can start your order now.”

    Customer: “This is total bull-s***. I am going to be filing a complaint with your store owner AND with corporate. ”

    (The customer stormed off without taking his money. I put the money aside and waited for him to come back. By the end of the shift he didn’t show up so I put in the charity collection… ironically, the charity collection that doesn’t have a tax on it.)

    With No Bacon, Comes No Responsibility

    , | WI, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

    (I work at a burger joint. I’m working on making burgers, when a woman marches up and tosses her burger on the counter. I look up from my work as one of my coworkers moves over to her.)

    Coworker: “Is there a problem, ma,am?”

    Woman: “Yes, I ordered a bacon double cheeseburger. This doesn’t have bacon.”

    (I know for a fact it does, as I was the one who made it. I also noticed she un-wrapped it, but didn’t bite into it or take it apart. My coworker signals for me, and I walk over.)

    Me: “I’m sorry; I’m the one who made this. I’m sure I included bacon. Could you please check?”

    (We do this so customers can’t complain if we handle their food after it’s already been made and given to them.)

    Woman: *sigh* “Isn’t that your job?”

    Me: “So you’re giving me permission to re-handle your food?”

    Woman: “What do you think?!”

    Me: “All right.”

    (I open the burger up, and sure enough, there’s bacon there.)

    Woman: “I want to see your manager.”

    Me: “Sure, but may I ask why?”

    Woman: “You ruined my burger; you shouldn’t have taken it apart to show me the bacon.”

    Me: “…I’ll go get her now.”

    (I got an official write-up for this! I’m sorry I was supposed to give customers x-ray vision, and have it myself.)

    Refuses To Speak Starbucksian

    | FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Language & Words

    (I’ve just finished handing off a drink to a customer at our pick-up counter. There’s a pair of ladies waiting to order at my register, and as I approach them, I overhear their conversation:)

    Customer #1: “…Yeah, I just refuse to learn their language.”

    (Our area has a fairly high population of non-English/English-as-a-second-language speakers. I brace myself to deal with “everyone should speak English,” until…)

    Customer #2: “Really?”

    Customer #1: “Yep! I just point to what I want.”

    (Apparently, the ‘language’ she refuses to learn is ‘medium hot coffee with cream, please.’)

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