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    Category: Food & Drink

    Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

    Entreating You For The Treats

    | MI, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Pets & Animals

    (I lock up and clean the vet clinic where I work. It’s a Saturday evening after a long, busy day. I’m in the middle of mopping the main lobby when I hear a knock at the glass door.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. We’re closed until Monday morning.”

    Man: “Miss, please, you have to let me in!”

    Me: “I can’t let you in. There is an emergency vet clinic down the road if your pet needs a veterinarian.”

    Man: “No, please, it’s an emergency!”

    Me: “I can’t let you in! I could be fired!”

    Man: *starts shaking the door*

    Me: “SIR! Please stop doing that! I told you I can’t let you in! If you continue to shake the door, I’m going to call the police!”

    Man: *on the verge of tears* “Please… please, let me in….”

    Me: “Do you need to pick up medicine or something? I can’t let you in, but maybe I can call my boss to help you.”

    Man: “No, I need [Brand of dog treats].”

    Me: “There’s a pet store down the street that sells them as well.”

    Man: “REALLY?”

    Me: “Yes…”

    Man: “THANKS! I OWE YOU!”

    (I never saw him again. Dude, I hope you got your treats.)

    Upgraded Complaints

    , | MT, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (I used to work at the local big-name ice cream and burger restaurant eight years ago. The night shift lead is the owner’s son that was just a little runt when I worked there. On this trip through the drive thru I order a small ice cream cone for me and a blended drink for my husband. We get the drink, but while the cashier is taking another order he opens the window:)

    Shift Lead: “So, she accidentally made a large cone instead of a small one. Is that still okay?”

    Me: *I raise an eyebrow and scoff dramatically* “No! It. Is. Not. Okay! You are giving me more for my money and it’s just unacceptable!”

    Shift Lead: *grinning and handing me the cone* “Gosh darn us for giving you a free upgrade, right?”

    Me: “Gripe, gripe, gripe. Obligatory threat to complain to your father, young man!”

    Shift Lead: *laughing* “Yeah, you have a good night, too!”

    I’ll Have My Usual Irregular

    | Columbus, OH, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I am another customer in this story standing at the drink counter stirring my coffee when two drinks come ready at the same time. Despite the drinks being different sizes, very different contents, and called out with both to a shop quiet enough to be heard easily, both customers reach for the same drink.)

    Customer #1: “Yours is the grande.”

    Customer #2: “Are you sure?”

    Customer #1: “Yeah, I had a tall.”

    Customer #2: “I guess I forgot what my regular is.”

    Trying To Explain In Black And White

    | Fairfax, VA, USA | Bigotry, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (I’m the hostess at an upscale restaurant where all the tables are pre-set with silverware rolled up in black linen napkins. If a customer with white pants come in, we trade out their silverware with one rolled in white linen. This prevents any black lint or string that might’ve been on the napkin from being highly visible. I’m currently working a busy Saturday and the restaurant is about 3/4 full. I’ve just sat a group of four ladies at a booth. Three of them are black and are wearing black pants or jeans. The fourth lady is white and wearing white pants. I switch out her silverware.)

    Black Lady #1: “I CANNOT BELIEVE WHAT I AM SEEING!”

    Me: “Pardon?”

    Black Lady #1: “YOU JUST GAVE HER WHITE SILVERWARE BECAUSE SHE’S WHITE!”

    Me: “Oh, no, ma’am. We do this for everyone who—”

    Black Lady #1: “—IS WHITE?! GET ME YOUR MANAGER NOW!! I CAN’T BELIEVE ANYONE CAN STILL BE RACIST WHEN OUR PRESIDENT IS BLACK!!”

    (I was too shocked about being yelled at in front of the full restaurant that I just sulked away quickly and got my manager. I could feel everyone staring. After spending 10 minutes at the table explaining to them the real reason I exchanged the silverware and also pointing out that practically every other white person in the restaurant had black linen silverware, the manager agreed to run out a couple free appetizers on the house. We stopped giving out the white linen after that night.)

    Sour About The Sign

    , | Australia | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (I work at a kebab store at a football stadium and have just put a sign up to let customers know we have no sour cream sauce left.)

    Customer: “I will have sour cream for the sauce.”

    Me: “Sorry, sir, we have no sour cream.” *points to the sign*

    Customer: *picks up the sign and throws it behind him and jumps on it* “Now I’ll have extra sour cream.”

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