Category: Family & Kids

There Were No Children In The Wild West

| Cody, WY, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(My husband and I own one of those photography studios where people dress up in Wild West costumes and get a sepia toned picture taken. Our sitting fee is based on how many people will be in the picture, regardless of their age.)

Me: “Welcome, how many people do you have in your picture today?”

Man: “Five, and one child.”

Me: “So six people?”

Man: “Five and a child.”

Me: “Six people, then. That will be—”

Man: *getting frustrated* “You charge for children?”

Me: “Yes, we charge the same for children and adults, considering we have to costume and pose them just the same.”

Man: “Even if they’re sitting on laps?!”

Me: “Does having a child sit on a lap for a photo make them magically morph into one entity?”

(Anybody who has to ask why a photographer doesn’t charge less for children has clearly never photographed children.)

Teenage Drama

| OH, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

(Due to a problem with teens destroying merchandise when unsupervised, my store has implemented a curfew which states that after nine pm, no person under 18 may be in the store unaccompanied by a parent or guardian. It’s frequent for children to lie about their age or say their parents are in another part of the store.)

Me: *spotting two obviously underage kids* “Hey, guys, are you both 18?”

Boy: *laughs* “No?”

Me: “Are your parents in the store?”

Girl: “…No?”

Me: “I’m sorry, guys, but we have a curfew and after nine you need to have your parents in the store with you.”

(They leave. About 15 minutes later a coworker spots them:)

Coworker: “Hey, are you 18?”

Boy: “Yeah.”

(I radio my coworker to tell her these are the same kids we just spoke to. She kicks them out again. 10 or so minutes later I’ve moved to the upstairs of the store and I spot the boy again.)

Me: “Hey, come on now; are your parents with you this time?”

Boy: “Yeah, she’s just downstairs.”

Me: “I’m sure. Look I need you to stay WITH your parents; you’ve been kicked out twice already.”

Boy: “What? I need to sit on my mom’s lap?”

Me: “You have to be accompanied by a parent after nine.”

Boy: “She’s right downstairs.”

Mother: *coming up the stairs* “Is there a problem?”

(I try to explain to her about our curfew but the whole time she is shouting over me.)

Mother: “HOW DARE YOU! I don’t understand why anyone would talk to a CHILD like this.”

Me: “I’m sorry if I addressed your son inappropriately, but you see we have a curfew—”

Mother: “YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m calm, but I’m trying to explain to you that we need your children to remain in your supervision at—”

Mother: “GET YOUR MANAGER. NOW!”

(I radio my manager who is covertly standing around the corner the whole time. The customer insists that I was screaming at her kids and that I rolled my eyes at her when she asked for a manager. After she leaves, another customer walks up.)

Other Customer: *to my manager* “I just want to say that she was fine, and that lady was a crazy person.”

Me: “THANK YOU.”

Doctor’s Disorders

| ID, USA | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Health & Body

Me: “Thank you for calling pediatrics, how can I help you?”

Caller: “Hi, yeah, I saw my doctor today and she recommended I use lotrimin on my daughter’s yeast infection diaper rash but I’m at the store and the bottle says not to use on children under two except under the advice of a doctor. So I’m not sure what to do now…”

A Cold Assumption

| OH, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, School

(It has been a very harsh winter. I am washing dishes as well as collecting money at the drive through window, so I am constantly shivering due to my arms and hands being wet. This customer pulls up to the window with her daughter.)

Customer: “It must be really cold like that!”

Me: “It’s not too bad.”

Customer: *turns to her daughter* “Honey, this is why you MUST get good grades in school, so you don’t end up living a horrible life like her!”

(I am shocked and offended by what the customer has said to her daughter about me, right in front of me.)

Me: “You mean going to [Well-known Private University] and working to pay for tuition?”

Customer’s Daughter: *to her mom* “Didn’t Dad graduate from [Well-known Private University]?”

(The customer drove off once she paid, looking very sheepish. Her daughter now attends the same university as I do, but works in the cafeteria to pay for her tuition.)

It’s Hard (Liquor) To Feed Family

| San Francisco, CA, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(A man comes into our store to steal. My coworker confronts him.)

Coworker: “Sir, you’re going to have to put that back.”

Customer: “I don’t have anything.”

Coworker: “I saw you put that bottle of brandy in your jacket.”

Customer: *puts bottle back* “You don’t understand. I need to feed my kids.”

Coworker: “…with brandy?”

Page 9/180First...7891011...Last