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    Category: Family & Kids

    I Am Just A Number

    | Bergen, Norway | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Top

    (I am out shopping with my 10-year-old sister. I am 23. Another customer, a woman in her 60s, approaches my sister as she is standing by herself for a moment.)

    Customer: “Are you the manager here?”

    Sister: “No…”

    Customer: “What are you, then?”

    Sister: “I’m 10…”

    Toying With The Books

    | Lithuania | Books & Reading, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month

    (We close at 3 pm on Saturdays. There’s a small supermarket next door. It’s Saturday, 2:55 pm. A customer walks in.)

    Customer: “Hello, I need some help. A friend invited me over to her house, and she has a small child. She told me not to get him anything, but I really think I should. I think I could get a book or a toy.”

    (I proceed to show him some nice children’s books, but he’s awfully indecisive and takes a long time deliberating over each one of them. He also wants it super cheap, but good. It’s now 3:10.)

    Customer: “I don’t know. This is so hard! Maybe I should get him a toy instead.”

    Me: “Well, a toy is also a good option. I have to warn you, though, that they usually come more expensive than books.”

    Customer: “You know what? I think I’ll go to [Supermarket] and look at some toys. If I don’t find what I like, I’ll come back here.”

    Me: “If you decided to get a toy, that’s fine, but we’re closing. You won’t be able to come back if you change your mind.”

    Customer: “No, I’ll go to the supermarket. I’ll come back later.”

    Me: “Sir, we’re closing. In fact, we’ve been closed for 10 minutes already.”

    (He appeared not to hear a thing I said and walked out of the store. I closed the store. I left some 10 minutes later, and on my way to the bus stop walked past the front doors. There was the same customer, banging on the locked door, with the CLOSED sign on it and the lights out inside, yelling to be let in!)

    Children Can Man-age To Listen

    , | NH, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Health & Body, Top

    (I’m a female-to-male transgender person who is not on hormones yet; despite this, I don’t have much of a problem with pronoun mistakes. The customer I have is a middle-aged woman and her young son, about six or seven.)

    Me: “Welcome to [Restaurant]. How are you today?”

    Woman: “I’m good.” *to her son* “Tell the lady what you want!”

    Son: “Momma, that’s a man.”

    Woman: “Shhh! Don’t say that! You’ll make her feel bad.”

    Me: “Actually, he’s right. I am a boy.”

    Woman: *ignoring me* “I can see why you’re confused, though.” *to me* “You need to start wearing makeup or something. My son is getting confused!”

    Me: “Ma’am, your son is correct.”

    Woman: *still ignoring what I’m saying* “And would it kill you to grow your hair out? Everyone’s going to think that you’re a lesbian!”

    Me: *getting fed up* “Ma’am. I. Am. A. Man.”

    Woman: “Why didn’t you say so?”

    Son: “He did. You didn’t listen, mommy.”

    Me: “Look, it’s not really a big deal. It happens all the time—”

    Woman: “Then grow some facial hair or something! I can’t tell what you are!”

    Me: “Um…”

    Son: “Mommy, stop being stupid!”

    (The son said his order and they checked out. The woman was completely silent after the son’s comment and she booked it out of the store.)

    Pet Owners Should Not Be Airheads

    | USA | Family & Kids, Pets & Animals, Theme Of The Month

    (A customer comes in with her eight-year-old son. The fish are in small, plastic cups for the customers to view.)

    Son: “Mommy! Look at the fishies!”

    Customer: *looks at fish* “How nice.”

    Son: “Can I get one?”

    Customer: “Sure. Pick a fish, and let’s go.”

    (They come to the counter, holding a fish.)

    Son: “But, mommy, doesn’t he need a tank, and filter?”

    Customer:  ”No, don’t be silly. He can live in the cup.”

    Son: “But he needs a filter for air!”

    Customer:  ”Don’t be so ridiculous. He’s a fish. He doesn’t need air. He breathes water.”

    Me: “Actually, he’s right. This kind of fish needs at least a two gallon tank to live in, as well as a filter, gravel, and food.”

    (The customer storms out with her son, mumbling about how we were ‘being stupid.’)

    Fingers Crossed You’ll Find A Solution

    | RetailProvidence, RI, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids

    (It’s been a long night and our store has given its 15 minute alert for customers to check out before we close the registers. I work in the children’s department and am watching a boy about eight years of age standing at the underwear display looking around nervously and fidgeting.)

    Boy’s Mother: *walks over* “What are you doing?”

    Boy: *whispers something, causing his mother to go red in the face*

    Mother: “Are you SERIOUS? WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? Do you have any common sense at ALL?!”

    (The boy hangs his head as his mother takes a breath. I turn to leave thinking he confessed a wrongdoing to his mom so it wasn’t my business. I’m stopped by a tap on the shoulder.)

    Me: “Yes, ma’am?”

    Mother: “I’m sorry to bug you, but… my son’s finger is stuck in a hole in the display.”

    Me: “Really?”

    Mother: “Yes, sorry about that.”

    Me: *lifting up my walkie talkie* “[Boss]? I have a little boy with his finger stuck in the underwear display… It’s turning purple and I need assistance.

    Boss: “Very funny.”

    Me: *seriously* “No… really.”

    Boss: “Oh, GOD!”

    (Half the store and both managers came to help. It took a mixture of butter substitute, hand sanitizer, and neosporin to save the finger!)

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