Category: Family & Kids

Upgraded Complaints

, | MT, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I used to work at the local big-name ice cream and burger restaurant eight years ago. The night shift lead is the owner’s son that was just a little runt when I worked there. On this trip through the drive thru I order a small ice cream cone for me and a blended drink for my husband. We get the drink, but while the cashier is taking another order he opens the window:)

Shift Lead: “So, she accidentally made a large cone instead of a small one. Is that still okay?”

Me: *I raise an eyebrow and scoff dramatically* “No! It. Is. Not. Okay! You are giving me more for my money and it’s just unacceptable!”

Shift Lead: *grinning and handing me the cone* “Gosh darn us for giving you a free upgrade, right?”

Me: “Gripe, gripe, gripe. Obligatory threat to complain to your father, young man!”

Shift Lead: *laughing* “Yeah, you have a good night, too!”

Customer Service To Swear By

| Bay Area, CA, USA | Family & Kids, Language & Words, Movies & TV

(My husband and I work at the same small store. This day he is helping a woman and her five- or six-year-old son while I am wiping down a counter nearby.)

Son: “[Name] watches adult movies.”

Husband: “Oh?!”

Customer: *quickly* “He means his cousin watches movies rated PG-13 or R.”

Husband: *laughs*

Son: “They have bad words in them.”

Husband: “Yeah, I don’t like bad words. They hurt my head and my heart, and make angels cry!”

(I had to bite the inside of my lip, and had to avoid looking at my husband to keep from laughing. My husband is a former member of the Navy, and still swears like a sailor!)

Will Make It Up To You

| Baltimore, MD, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Health & Body

(I work for a popular makeup company that provides free ‘make-unders’ to clients for special occasions and events. I work in a full sized boutique. I have a client in for a homecoming look. She looks about 16. Her mother is there with her as well.)

Client: “This is such a cool job. I’d love to work here.”

Me: “Well, how old are you? You have to be 18 to work here.”

Client: “Darn! I’m 17 for another few months. So close.”

Mother: “Anyway, honey, you need to get a REAL job. You’re better than being a makeup counter girl.”

(I proceed to drop the brush I’m using because I was so surprised that someone would say that right in front of my face. Her daughter looked mortified and gave me an apologetic look. I go behind the counter and get an application.)

Me: “Here, fill out this application. I’ll put in a good word for you when you turn 18.”

Putting The Poop Into Party Pooper

| Fresno, CA, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids

(I work in a kind of crazy knick-knack store. We have some odd things and our pen holder is a piece of fake poop. I’m finishing up a lady with her purchase. She’s paid with a card so I ask her to sign.)

Customer: “GIVE ME ANOTHER PEN! That is disgusting and I’m not using it!”

(I hand her a different pen she signs.)

Customer: “Tell the supervisor that I’m not amused and that is completely inappropriate and disgusting!”

Me: “I will pass along the message. Have a nice day.”

(Her grandson turns to me:)

Grandson: “Don’t worry. She’s a party pooper! Party pooper!”

The Day Just Got A Whole Lot More Crappy

| PA, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Movies & TV

(A very popular family film has just opened, and a lot of parents are bringing in young children and babies. It’s causing a lot of problems, as the parents and children are leaving enormous messes in the theaters, including popcorn all over the floors, spilled drinks everywhere and even dirty diapers on the seats, which means the entire surrounding area must be sanitized for health reasons. As a result, most theaters aren’t clean enough to let other customers in until less than five minutes before the next scheduled show time. I’m working as an usher, tearing tickets and letting people into the theaters. I’m still waiting on the theater showing the family film to be clean enough to let people in. A huge family with about six young children, including a baby, is among the group waiting to be let in. Finally, I’m given the go-ahead to let people in. The father of the family confronts me as I tear his ticket.)

Father: “That took too long! I’m half-tempted to demand a refund!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but there have been a lot of young families leaving messes that need to be cleaned up. They just had to thoroughly sanitize half the theater, because several people left dirty diapers sitting on the seats.”

Father: “Wait… so you’ll clean up if I leave my son’s diaper in the theater?”

Me: *furious but trying to retain composure* “Please… don’t. I swear to god, don’t do it.”

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