November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Family & Kids

Very Grim Job Prospects

| CT, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month

(I work retail and overhear a mother and child.)

Child: “Is that a scythe?”

Me: “Yes, it is.”

Child: “Mom, can I have it?”

Mother: “Why?”

Child: “So I can reap souls.”

Me: “Wait, what?”

Child: “I want to be the Grim Reaper by the time I’m 15, and then retire by the age of 30.”

Me: “She’s joking, right?”

Mother: “No…”

The Mother Of All Refunder Blunders

| Finland | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

(I buy an album of a certain artist as a birthday present for my mother. I am not sure that I haven’t mixed up my father’s and my mother’s favorite artists, so I made sure she can exchange the album in case I have. It turns out I did mix up the artists. A few days after her birthday, my mother comes to visit me and she is fuming. She is usually very calm and nice.)

Mother: “You need to call to the store where you bought this from! They refuse to exchange it! Here, at least I got their number when I was there.”

(She hands me a post-it note with a phone number written on it.)

Me: “Really? They assured me they would.”

Mother: “I went there and they wouldn’t. I lost my temper a little and caused a bit of a scene, but still they didn’t.”

Me: “You had the receipt and everything?”

Mother: “No, I lost it, but that shouldn’t matter in this day and age of computers and god-d*** records of everything, should it?!”

Me: “Okay, I’ll call them and let’s see what’s up.”

(I call the number on the post-it note and all the while my mother is ranting in the background. I can’t hear the clerk introducing herself properly.)

Me: “Yeah, hi. I’m calling about an exchange that my mother tried to get done in your store.”

(There is a foreboding silence.)

Me: “Hello?”

Clerk: “Yes, I’m here. Does your mother happen to have [a bit unusual color hair] and blue rimmed glasses?”

Me: “Yes.”

Clerk: “Well, you can tell her that she is banned for life from this store! She came in here demanding to exchange a CD. She didn’t have a receipt AND the CD was never bought from this store in the first place! She ended up getting all our managers to cater to her and finally threw the CD at my head!”

Me: “Wait, is this not [Music Store]?”

Clerk: “NO!”

Me: “…Uh, could you please hold on for a second?” *to my mother* “Did you really go to the wrong store?!”

Mother: “Who cares! They sell CDs in both! What does it matter to them where I got it from?”

Me: “Trust me, it matters. Did you throw the CD at some poor girl?!”

Mother: “It couldn´t have hurt her! What is she whining about? It is ME whose feelings have been hurt and time wasted!”

Me: “Mom, it most definitely is not you who has been hurt here!”

Me: *to clerk* “I am so sorry about my mother! Thank you very much for not making a bigger issue out of her behavior. She will never bother you again; I’ll make sure of it.”

Clerk: “Well, okay. Thanks and bye.”

Me: *to mother* “Are you insane or what?!”

(It took me almost an hour to get my mother to understand what she had done. This required explaining some quite basic facts about how societies work. When she finally did understand she was very embarrassed. I took a box of chocolates and a note from my mother to the music store and the same clerk was luckily there. She was really nice and cute and was already able to laugh about the matter. I would have asked her out, but I think there was no future to be had with her and her potential mother-in-law.)

Should Be Gifted With Foresight

| Spokane, WA, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers

(I am running cash registers, and an elderly woman comes up with a $50 gift card and items. The woman is pretty chatty.)

Woman: “And my son gifted me this for my birthday. It’s really sweet of him. I’m glad he’s turning things around; he used to get into such trouble.

(I run the gift card, see that it isn’t registering, and try a few more times. I get a manager down to see if they can help. The woman was being quite patient about it. The manager can’t get it to work.)

Manager: “Uh. Where did you get this card?”

Woman: “Oh, my son gifted it to me, why?”

Manager: *hesitates* “I hate to tell you… but the card was never activated.”

(Which can mean the cashier forgot to scan it when it was bought, or more likely, that it was taken right off the rack and out of the store.)

Woman: “Son of a b****! I can’t believe it!”

Manager: “I apologi—”

Woman: “No, I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at my son for gifting me a stolen gift card! When I get home, I will give him a piece of my mind!” *to me* “I’m sorry to ask you to cancel the orders; I don’t have the money to spare right now.”

(She left the store right after. I could only speculate how the call went down!)

Not Making The Organic Choice

USA | Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I work at a small local cookie store. In addition to cookies, we sell local ice cream. Our store is across the street from a chain restaurant popular with tourists. It’s been an unusually busy day, so we run out of vanilla ice cream and are serving a supermarket brand. We still have a couple other flavors from the usual supplier. A boy, who’s probably about ten years old, comes in by himself.)

Me: “Welcome to [Store]. How can I help you?”

Boy: “My family’s eating dinner across the street, and I’m trying to convince them to come here. Is this a family owned business or a chain?

Me: “We’re a family business, and this is the only store.”

Boy: “My mom only eats at locally owned, organic, healthy restaurants. She’s doesn’t let me buy any dessert without checking it first.”

(He leaves, and comes back a little while later with his family. They order their cookies first and then examine the ice cream flavors.)

Mom: “Is that [Supermarket Brand] ice cream?”

Me: “Unfortunately, we’ve had a lot of large orders today, so we have to sell supermarket vanilla. But we have three other flavors that are all from a local creamery, made with organic, super-premium ingredients and fresh fruit.”

Mom: “No, no, no! Just give us the supermarket brand. That sounds much better.”

Customers Are Cry-Babies

| London, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I work in a clothing store with 3 floors, and the fitting rooms are on the top floor. I have been chatting with a customer, admiring her adorable baby. Five minutes later, I notice the stroller is in the corner, baby fast asleep, but the mother is nowhere to be seen.)

Me: *on the store walkies* “Hey, guys, I’ve got a sleeping baby downstairs and the mother doesn’t seem to be down here. She’s blonde with a cool red leather jacket. Can anyone see her on their floor?”

Colleague: “Yeah, I just put her in a fitting room up here! Let me check in with her. I didn’t know she had a kid with her!”

(A couple of minutes pass.)

Colleague: “Yeah… She’s ‘just trying on a couple things and will be back in a minute.'”

Manager: “Um, no. Can you let her know that we are not responsible for her child, and she needs to come downstairs right away? We have a customer lift so she can bring the stroller up to the fitting rooms.”

Me: “Oh, god, it’s crying. What do I do?”

(I enjoy the cuteness of babies, but they freak me out.)

Colleague: “She’s on her way down, and she is NOT happy.”

Me: “Neither is her baby!”

(The customer comes stomping down the stairs, various items of clothing hanging off of her.)


Me: “Ma’am, I haven’t touched the stroller at all, but you really can’t leave your child unat—”

Customer: “Ugh, well, of COURSE she’s crying. You need to rock the stroller back and forth! God!! What kind of idiot are you?!”

(My manager appears, as if by magic.)

Manager: “Ma’am, my staff are not your babysitting service. We have elevators and large fitting rooms specifically for our customers who want to bring their children while they shop. We will be as accommodating as possible, but you cannot just leave your baby down here without saying a word. Frankly, I don’t understand why you would want to leave her with a complete stranger. Please stop shouting at my employee. Honestly, the noise is just making your baby cry more.”

(The customer gapes like a fish for a minute, embarrassed, mutters a rather sulky apology, and goes back upstairs – with the baby, this time.)

Me: “You’re a lifesaver.”

Manager: “Why would she leave that baby here? You could be a psychopath for all she knows.”

Me: “…Thanks?”