Category: Family & Kids

More Money, More Problems

| New Zealand | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Money

(I work for a cinema that has a gaming area attached to it. All the games run on coins only, and there are signs up everywhere stating this. I am the person working in the Games Zone today, and am currently patrolling around the area for game faults or shady characters. A woman with two children approach me.)

Patron: “Excuse me, miss?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am?”

Patron: “Your game is broken. I am very upset. My children really wanted to play on this but it won’t accept our money! It just ate the money and gave us no game!”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. Sometimes the games do eat the coins. I’ll just fetch some tokens and come over to see if I can get it working.”

Patron: “Well, hurry up! We have a movie starting soon but they really want to play this game first! We don’t have all afternoon!”

(I return to my booth to collect a couple of tokens to put in the machine, to see if I can get the game running. When I return to the game the woman has already seated her children in the seats, in a way that I cannot get to the coin slot.)

Me: “‘Scuse me kids. I just need you to move for a moment.”

Patron: “What are you doing? Kicking my kids off the game?!”

Me: “No. They are in the way of the coin slot, so I can’t put the tokens in. I just need them to shift for a moment.”

Patron: “Geez, just lean over! You’re tall, even I can do that!”

(She snatches my bag of tokens from my hand and gets a few out. She practically smothers her children as she leans over to reach the coin slot, violently jamming the token in. It is obviously not going to go in, as something clearly is blocking it.)

Me: “Ma’am, I just need you to stop trying to shove the token in. Something is blocking the way. I think the money you put in before might have jammed up inside. I just need your kids to move and I’ll see if I can clear it.”

(She scoffs at me and mutters about how stupid the game is, but makes her kids move. I lean down to inspect the coin slot and to my surprise, find a $5 note folded up and jammed in the slot. After a little bit of wriggling I manage to pull it out.)

Me: “Um, did you fold up a note and put it in here?”

Patron: “Yes, that’s mine!”

Me: “Well, that is the problem. The machines only take coins, not notes. The slot doesn’t accept bills of any sort.”

Patron: “Well that’s stupid! Anyway, I did put coins in. I put two $1 coins in, and they wouldn’t go all the way through, so I thought it must take notes instead!”

(I inspect the coin slot again, and after a little wriggling with a key, manage to spot two coins that she has pushed in TOGETHER at the same time, which became wedged. The note had wedged them further down the slot, so I cannot get them out.)

Me: “Well, I’m afraid the coins are well and truly stuck in there now. I cannot get them out and no other coins can get past. Your kids can’t play the game today.”

Patron: “What? Well that is f****** ridiculous! We paid money for this game, it’s still running. Just credit it a game or something by opening up the computer slot or something!”

Me: “I just give out change and put up ‘Out of Order’ signs… I don’t fix games.”

Patron: “Well, you’re useless down here then, aren’t you?!”

From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 6

| Calgary, AB, Canada | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Language & Words, Top

(I work at a hockey stadium ticket booth. A customer is using the ‘F’ word a ridiculous amount of times. Everyone is getting tired of this guy, but none faster than the six-year-old girl behind him in line.)

Little Girl:  “My Mom says if ya can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all!”

Crowd: *various sounds of agreement and thanks that she said what they felt they couldn’t*

Customer: “Well your mom must be a [10-second string of words and phrases that should NEVER be spoken to a child, EVER].”

Little Girl:  *crinkles her face up* “If you followed that rule you’d never talk again!”

(The crowd laughs loudly at the remark, and the foul-mouthed customer and his friend are shamed out of line. I comped half her father’s order.)

Related:
From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 5
From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 4
From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 3
From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 2
From The Mouth Of Babes

The Mother Of Bad Decisions

| SD, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I am working at the customer service desk at the grocery store in my town. It’s about three in the afternoon, and I’m an hour into an eight-hour shift. I am alone at the front of the store, when a customer that I do not know comes up to me.)

Me: “Hello. What can I do for you today?”

Customer: “Hey, I need a babysitter for my kid tonight. Can you come and do it?”

(I’m a little taken aback but give her a smile anyway.)

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry but I am working the closing shift tonight.”

Customer: “Great! Who is supposed to watch my kid tonight? I have very important plans!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but there’s nothing I can do to help you.”

Customer: “Thanks a lot! You just ruined my entire night! Teenagers today are so lazy and worthless!”

(I stare at her open-mouthed as she stomps away. A few minutes later, I see her ask another one of my coworkers, whom politely declines, because she’s also working all night. The customer rushes out of the store cussing, leaving her full cart of groceries behind.)

Allow Me To (Mind)Read You The Menu

| Solon, OH, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(It’s a very busy night, and I am currently waiting on five tables. My current customer is an older male.)

Me: “Sir, what can I get for you tonight?”

Customer: “Oh, you know.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “Oh, you know what I want.”

Me: “No, I’m sorry. I don’t.”

(The customer looks at his son for help.)

Son: “Dad, you have to tell her what you want to eat.”

Customer: “She KNOWS what I want.”

Son: “Just order some food Dad. She isn’t a mind reader.”

Customer: “Steak.”

Me: “What kind, sir? We have sirloin, filet, t-bone—”

Customer: “Oh, you know.”

(This proceeds for about five minutes, selecting his steak, the temperature, and sides. Finally I get to the son, who has been deciphering the conversation.)

Me: “And for you, sir?”

Son: “… I forgot.”

Great Minds Think Alike

| GA, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Top

(I am working in a fast food sub shop when a nice regular walks in. Behind in line are a small child and his mother.)

Me: “A cheesesteak sandwich with no onions and a medium drink, [Regular]?”

Regular: “As always.” *pays and leaves*

Small Child: “You knew exactly what that guy wanted! Do you READ MINDS?! Tell me what I want to eat!”

(The mother mouths to me behind her son’s back.)

Me: “You want a… peanut butter and jelly sandwich!”

Small Child: “Well… what kind of jelly do I want?”

(The mother mouths to me again.)

Me: “Hmm… grape!”

Small Child: “Wow, you do read minds! Mommy, she reads minds!”

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