Category: Family & Kids

Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 6

| UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Health & Body

(I’m 26 but quite petite, so I often get mistaken for being a lot younger. I’m also married and seven months pregnant. I’m at a higher end department store trying on dresses. I’m just leaving the changing room with a very helpful salesgirl. The next person goes in leaving a customer and her teen daughter next in line.)

Customer: *in a stage whisper* “See! That’s why you keep your legs closed at school. So you don’t end up buying your prom dress looking like that.”

(Her daughter goes red as several other customers stare in disbelief.)

Daughter: “For God’s sake, mum! Shut up!”

Me: “Oh, no, your mum’s right. That’s exactly what my mum told me. When I was 16. 10 years ago.”

(The customer reddens as her daughter glares at her.)

Me: “So what I did was, I studied hard at school, went to university, and got a degree. I started my own business, bought a car, and then a house. I met my partner, dated for a couple of years, then got married. Now that we’re financially comfortable we’re having a baby. I’m not saying that’s for everyone but you don’t want to wake up one day to find you’re 50, miserable, bigoted, and rude.”

Customer: *very embarrassed by everyone’s stares* “I’m only 42!”

Me: “I’m sure that’s what your daughter will remember about today.”

Related:
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 5
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 4
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 3
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 2
Cause For Pregnant Pause

Some Customers Are A Pet Hate

| PA, USA | Books & Reading, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Pets & Animals

Caller: “Hi, I’m looking for a specific book to help my children deal with the death of a pet.”

Me: All right. Can you give me the title or author?

Caller: “Oh, I don’t remember it. But I’ve purchased copies from your store before. I know you have it!”

(I search for at least fifteen minutes; using every variant on the phrase ‘death of a pet’ I can think of. The customer alternates between telling me about her poor sick dog, insisting that she’s purchased it here before, and that I really should know about it. Finally, I find the book she wants.)

Customer: “Thank you! That wasn’t all that hard, now, was it?”

Me: “All right, ma’am. I’m afraid we do not have this book in the store right now. I’ll happily order you a copy—”

Customer: “When will it get here?”

Me: “Three to five business days.”

Customer: “But she’s being put down tomorrow! I was counting on you!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m very sorry, but this is the best I can do, unless you want to order the book from our website yourself and pay extra for overnight shipping.”

Customer: “… You know what? Never mind. I’ll just tell the kids she went to live on a farm, and tell them the truth in a few years.” *click*

Hashtag STFU

| Canada | Family & Kids, Technology

(I’m scooping ice cream when four girls approach, probably in their early teens. One girl doesn’t look up from her cellphone the entire time.)

Girl #1: “Like, O-M-G. We should totes get ice cream.”

Girl #2: “We should! Hashtag delicious!”

(At this point I sort of do a double take as I have never heard anyone use ‘O-M-G’ and ‘hashtag’ in an actual sentence. )

Girl #3: “Totes hashtag guilty pleasure. Hashtag favourite food.”

Girl #1: “O-M-G . What flavors should we get? Hashtag decisions!”

Girl #3: “Hashtag double scoops. Hashtag muffin top! Let’s each get two scoops! We’re soooo bad!”

(They proceeded to get their ice cream and then I witnessed them all smooshed together outside the store taking selfies with their ice cream cones, all while making a duck face. I needed to take a break after that to regather my faith in humanity.)

Generation ZZZ

| Caledonia, NY, USA | Family & Kids

(I’m a lead cashier and I notice a teenage boy walking up and down the aisles, so I approach him.)

Me: “Can I help you find anything?”

Customer: “No. I’m just bored so I’m gonna look around in here for a while, because I have nothing else to do.”

(What a generation…)

It’s Time To End The Shift On A High

| Huntsville, AL, USA | Awesome Customers, Bizarre, Family & Kids

(I’m just finishing up a call with a pleasant customer, my last call for the day. Because of mandatory overtime, I’ve been at work for almost 12 hours straight and can’t wait to leave.)

Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with, sir?”

Customer: “Hang on. My daughter wants to ask you a question.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I hear the customer hand the phone to his daughter. She sounds very young: probably three or four.)

Girl: “Hi!”

Me: “Hi, there! How are you?”

Girl: “Good. Hey, do you know what time it is?”

Me: *playing along* “No, sweetie. What time is it?”

Girl: “It’s peanut butter jelly time! Peanut butter jelly time! Peanut butter jelly! Peanut butter jelly! Peanut butter jelly and a baseball bat!”

Customer: “Sorry about that. She just HAS to sing it every time I’m on the phone.”

Me: *laughing really hard* “It’s perfectly fine, sir. I can’t think of a better way to end my shift!”

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