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    Category: Family & Kids

    Playing The Name Game

    | Lynnwood, WA, USA | Family & Kids, Funny Names

    (A customer calls in with a question. This is during heavy snow, so traveling to a store is a big deal.)

    Customer: “Hi I’m looking for [name of video game], but not [game with very similar name]. I’ve called in everywhere and no one seems to have it.”

    Me: “Okay, Let me just look that up for you.”

    (I proceed with looking up the game and find out that they stopped making the series and that there wasn’t in fact even a game by the title she wanted.)

    Me: “Okay it looks like we have [game with similar name] but they never made [game she wanted].”

    Customer: “Oh great! I’ll come right down to pick it up! I can’t believe you have it!”

    (The customer hangs up before I can repeat that we didn’t have it and that it doesn’t exist. Later in the day my boss informs me a lady up front wants to talk to me; I dread going to the front to a woman who has driven through to snow to look for a game doesn’t exist.)

    Customer: “Hi, [my name]! I just wanted to thank you in person for helping me find [game she wanted]. My son was looking for it everywhere!”

    (As she says this, she holds up the game with the similar title.)

    Me: “You’re… welcome?”

    Son: “Mom! You’ve been calling it the wrong name all day!”

    Piercing Observation

    | Miami, FL, USA | Family & Kids, Top, Underaged

    (I’m approached by what looks to be a teenager and a younger child.)

    Teenager: “Hello. My daughter would like to get her belly button pierced.”

    Me: “Did the man at the front check your ID?”

    Teenager: “No.”

    Me: “I’m going to have to.”

    (I see that he is seventeen years old.)

    Me: “Sir, this ID shows that you’re even younger then me. How old are you?”

    Younger Child: “Eleven.”

    Me: “So she’s eleven?”

    Teenager: “Yes.”

    Me: “And you’re seventeen?”

    Teenager: “Yes.”

    Me: “So you had her when you were six?”

    *long pause*

    Younger Child: “I told you it wouldn’t work, dumba**!”

    A Rude Retorte

    | Alabama, USA | Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (I am a cake decorator in a bakery. I am closing up the department when the phone rings.)

    Me: “This is the bakery, how may I help you?”

    Customer: “Yes! Oh my god, please tell me you have the cake kit!”

    Me: “Yes we do have the kit.”

    Customer: “Finally! I’ve looked everywhere for it and you’re the only place that has it! Okay I need to order a cake.”

    Me: “Alright, when you were going to need it?”

    Customer: “In about thirty minutes.”

    Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, but I would not be able to do that.”

    Customer: “What? Why the h*** not?”

    Me: “The bakery closes at 6:00 pm on Sundays and I’ve already clocked out for the day. I can place the order for tomorrow afternoon, though.”

    Customer: “No! No! I need it now! It’s my son’s birthday today and I need a cake! I forgot to order the cake!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. There’s nothing I can do.”

    Customer: “You can make my son’s g**d*** cake is what you can do!”

    Me: “I’m sorry. You can come and choose one from our case and I could write something on it for you.”

    Customer: “No! I don’t want those cakes! That’s great! Just great! I hope you’re happy; you just ruined my baby’s first birthday!” *hangs up*

    Do As I Say, Not As I Play

    | Wilmington, NC, USA | Family & Kids

    (A little girl approaches me by herself.)

    Little Girl: “The game I was playing didn’t give me all of my tickets.”

    Me: “Do you know what the game was called?”

    Little Girl: “Uhh…no.”

    Me: “Well, if you could just go find out the name of the game and come back and tell me, I can send someone over there to help you.”

    (She walks back into the arcade. Thirty seconds later, a very angry looking man walks up to my counter.)

    Customer: “Why the h*** would you send her back there by herself? She’s only 8 years old!”

    Me: “Well, she came up here unsupervised.”

    Customer: “I was playing a game! I couldn’t stop in the middle of my game!”

    Not So Pretty In Pink

    | New York, NY, USA | Family & Kids

    (A customer is trying on a black and white top by a well known designer and it fits her very well. Her daughter is with her.)

    Customer: “I just wish this wasn’t black and white. I want something brighter.”

    Me: “Well, we do have a dress by the same designer which has the same silhouette in pink. I think it would look good with your complexion and hair color.”

    Customer: “No thanks. My daughter doesn’t think I look good in pink so I’m going to have to listen to her on this.”

    (The customer’s five-year old daughter solemnly nods with approval.)

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