Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Crime Can Be A Vicious Cycle
    (1,829 thumbs up)
  • October Theme Of The Month: Coupon Complications!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Family & Kids

    One Mother, One Cup

    | Springfield, MO, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Money

    Customer: “Hi I need to return this.” *hands over an opened and clearly worn jock cup*

    Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, this is a completely non-returnable item.”

    Customer: “I called and you said your return policy is 30 days with receipt.”

    Me: “That’s except for jocks and mouth-guards. Cashiers tell you at the time of purchase that they’re completely non-returnable.”

    Customer: “Well, I didn’t understand. So, there’s nothing you can do for me?”

    Me: “I’m sorry. It’s store policy based on our health-code.”

    Customer: “Well, how was I supposed to know that my little boy would have such a big wee-wee?” *grabs her very embarrassed-looking son and leaves*

    Mothers Can Be A Daily Grind

    | New Hampshire, USA | Family & Kids

    (We were giving away free packages of instant coffee for promotional reasons. Each package was about the size of a sugar packet.)

    Customer: "What’s that?"

    Me: "It’s a free package of instant coffee. Would you like one?"

    Customer: "How does it work?"

    Me: "Just put it in a cup, and mix it with water."

    Customer: "Is the cup, and water inside the package?"

    Customer’s Mother: "You’re a moron."

    A Golden Snitch Short Of A Quidditch Match

    | Bay Area, CA, USA | Books & Reading, Family & Kids, Movies & TV

    Me: “How can I help you?”

    Caller: “This a bookstore?”

    Me: “Yes, this is a bookstore.”

    Caller: “Oh. I need the 8th Harry Potter book.”

    Me: “I’m sorry sir, but there are only 7 Harry Potter books.”

    Caller: “But I need the 8th one.”

    Me: “There are only 7 books, sir.”

    Caller: “Why?”

    Me: “Because there are only 7 years at Hogwarts.”

    Caller: “What does that mean?”

    Me: “Sir, have you read the Harry Potter books?”

    Caller: “No, my son reads them and he finished the 7th one and asked me to get the 8th one.”

    Me: “Sir, if he read the 7th one, he would know that that was the final book in the series.”

    Caller: “But he wants to read it. What can I do?”

    Me: “Contact the author?”

    Caller: “Do you have his number?”

    Me: “Do I have J.K. Rowling’s number?”

    Caller: “Yes.”

    Me: “No. I… uh… don’t happen to have that on me.”

    Caller: “Oh. Can you tell my son that there are only 7?”

    Me: “No, I’m sure you’re quite capable of doing that all on your own.”

    Caller: “He will be very upset!” *hangs up*

    Ah Fathers, Part 4

    | California, USA | Family & Kids

    (A customer walks up to the counter in a very aggressive way.)

    Customer: “You sold a very violent game to my 14 year old son!”

    Me: “I apologize, which game did we sell him?”

    (The customer hands me copy of the game.)

    Me: “Sir, this games is rated "M" we won’t sell this game to anyone under the age of 17 without proper I.D. Are you sure he got it here?”

    Customer: “Yeah!” *hands me receipt*

    (The receipt had been printed at my register, and was marked for earlier that day.)

    Me: “The only copy of this game we sold today was sold to a 21 year old.”

    Customer: “Well he acts like a 14 year old!”

    Related:
    Ah, Fathers, Part 3
    Ah, Fathers, Part 2
    Ah, Fathers

    Customers To Keep You On Your Toes

    | Dallas, TX, USA | Family & Kids, School

    (My husband and I inherited a dance studio from his mother and we’re both full-time teachers there. Naturally, our five-year-old spends a lot of time with us at the studio. Her father and I were playing "Swan Lake" with her one day in one of the dance studios after all the classes were over when a mother and her daughter came in.)

    Customer: “Excuse me!”

    Me: “Can I help you? Classes are over for the day.”

    Customer: “I would like to organize one-on-one private lessons with you for my daughter.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t do private lessons.”

    Customer: “So why is he teaching that little girl how to do a lift?”

    Me: “That’s our daughter. He’s not teaching her anything, he’s just picking her up. We were playing a game.”

    Customer: “I demand you give my child private lessons!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’ve just told you, we don’t do that here.”

    Customer: “She’s been in your class for two years!”

    Me: “Yes, I know.”

    Customer: “That little girl isn’t even old enough to be in your class.”

    Me: “No, she’s not, but she’s my daughter. She’s been exposed to ballet since she was a baby.”

    Customer: “So has my child! She knows culture!”

    Me: “I understand, ma’am, but I just can’t give her private lessons.”

    Customer: “Why are you letting her do it, then?”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’ve told you already, she’s my daughter. She gets private lessons with me whether she likes it or not. We live together.”

    Customer: “So if I send my daughter to live with you, will you teach her?”

    Me: “Ma’am, you can’t send your daughter to live with us.”

    My Daughter: “Mommy! Look at me!”

    Customer: “Oh, she really is your daughter? I thought you were lying. See you tomorrow for class!”

    Page 137/150First...135136137138139...Last