Category: Family & Kids

Necessity Is The Daughter Of Incomprehension

| Orlando, FL, USA | Family & Kids

(A mom and daughter come up to my checkout. As I ring up the items, the mom notices the novelty pens by the register.)

Customer: “How cute! Do you want one, honey?”

Customer’s Daughter: “I don’t need one.”

Customer: “That’s not what I asked. Do you want one? How often does your mom say that?”

Customer’s Daughter: “I don’t need one.”

Customer: “Look, they light up! Which color do you want?”

Customer’s Daughter: “Doesn’t matter. I don’t need a pen.”

Customer: “Choose a color or I’ll choose for you!”

Customer’s Daughter: “Mom, you’re wasting money!”

Customer: *to me* “We’ll take the blue one.”

Two And A Half Customers

| San Jose, CA, USA | Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers

(Our salon requires a credit card hold for parties of three or more to discourage last-minute cancellations. It doesn’t matter how old the customers are. Whether they are 3-year-olds or 80-year-olds, we still reserve a spot for them regardless. We have a lot of customers who try to get around the credit card rule.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [salon], how can I help you?”

Caller: “Hi, I wanted to make appointments for two people today.”

Me: “Sure, what kind of services would you like?”

Caller: “Two pedicures.”

(I book the appointments, confirm with the caller, and am about to end the call.)

Caller: “I also wanted to bring my daughter in for a kid’s pedi.”

Me: “Oh okay, so you’re actually booking for three people?”

Caller: *sounding annoyed* “Does she even count? She’s just a kid.”

Me: “Yes, she does. She’s still a person.”

Caller: “That’s ridiculous!”

Even Customers Fall Short

, | Kansas City, Missouri, USA | Family & Kids, Underaged

(I am in a local dollar store/pharmacy. This happened to me when I as ten years old. An elderly looking woman comes up.)

Customer: “Do you work here?”

Me: “Me?”

Customer: “Yes, you.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m still in grade school.”

Customer: *mumbling while walking away* “Lazy employees. Always coming up with excuses!”

Who Needs Learnin’ When You Can Be Sun Burnin’

| Canton, MI, USA | Family & Kids

(A coworker and I are cleaning up the magazines. A father and his two kids are walking by.)

Father: *to his son* “I just can’t believe you’re wasting your time looking at books when it’s such a nice day outside!”

This Apple Fell Far From Its Tree, Part 2

| Boston, MA, USA | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids

(I work at a museum catering to children. A man and his son are examining our electronic magnifier, which has clear instructions in large type right next to it.)

Dad: *yanking and knocking on machine* “How does this stupid thing work?!”

Son: “Well, did you read the directions?”

Dad: “What directions?!”

Son: “The words under that big sign that says ‘Directions’.”

Related:
This Apple Fell Far From Its Tree

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