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    Category: Family & Kids

    Don’t Fool Around With Daycare

    | Colorado Springs, CO, USA | Family & Kids

    Caller: “Hey, you take care of kids?”

    Me: “Yes. What ages and times are you needing?”

    Caller: “Well, I got six kids and I need them outta here while I do my thang.”

    Me: “Your ‘thang’?”

    Caller: “Yeah, I can’t get my mack on with all them d*** kids runnin’ around. So, could you take them from like…8pm to 3 or 4am?”

    Me: “I don’t do overnight care, sir. I’m sorry.”

    Caller: “That’s okay. By the way, are you married?”

    Their Parenting Is Nothing To Rave About

    | Baytown, TX, USA | Family & Kids

    (A customer that I served earlier this particular day walks in with small child of about one year. The child starts screaming and the mom puts the child down to run around unattended.)

    Customer: “I need to return these shoes.”

    Me: “Okay, was there anything wrong with them?”

    Customer: “No, I just thought I had more money than I really did.”

    Me: “Oh okay, that’s fine.”

    Customer: “Yeah, I need that money so I can go to raves!”

    Get Thee To A Nursery

    | USA | Family & Kids

    (An older customer comes to the counter with lingerie and skimpy outfits that are clearly too small for her.)

    Customer: *defensively* “They aren’t for me!”

    Me: “Okay.”

    Customer: “What do you see in my hair?”

    Me: “Uh, nothing?”

    Customer: “A lot of white! You see? White!”

    (She grabs several white strands of her hair and shows them to me.)

    Me: “Okay?”

    Customer: “It’s not okay…not when I don’t have grandkids. My daughter is 30 and hasn’t even started dating! I hope this will help her along!”

    Parenting Isn’t A Cake Walk

    | Hamilton, ON, Canada | Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (A mother and her son are sampling several kinds of ice cream, trying to decide what kind of ice cream cake they want. Note that all flavors are clearly labelled with their contents.)

    Customer: “Are there nuts in the pralines ‘n’ cream ice cream? My son is allergic to nuts.”

    Me: “Yes, pralines are nuts. You did not tell me he has a nut allergy. How’s your son, is he okay? Should I call an ambulance? Do you need help?”

    Customer: “So, about my cake…I’m still not really sure what flavors I want. How can I order my cake now? My son’s face is getting itchy.”

    Me: “You should probably just go ahead and take him to the hospital. Can I call someone? Do you want to use my phone? How’s your son doing?”

    Customer: “Yes, I should probably go to the hospital, but then, how will I order my cake? I want this cake. What should I do?”

    Me: “Take a card and call us with a phone order later. You should get your son some help!”

    Customer: “But, about my cake…”

    (She finally takes him to the hospital. Luckily, it is close by!)

    Don’t Kick A (Half) Man When He’s Down

    | Thunder Bay, Ontario, Canada | Family & Kids

    (A woman and her young daughter are browsing books.)

    Daugher: “Mom, what’s a ‘has been’?”

    Mother: “Charlie Sheen is a has been.”

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