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    Category: Family & Kids

    And The Children Shall (Eat) Lead

    | Scotland, UK | Family & Kids, Health & Body, Top

    (We stock painted mediaeval knight figurines. However, they have removable weapons and are painted with lead paint, so they’re all kept on a high shelf out of the reach of children. Just to be safe, there are signs next to the figures stating that they are not safe for children. One day, I see a small boy gnawing on a William Wallace figure’s head, so I rush over and snatch it off him.)

    Mother: “How dare you! That was very rude!”

    Me: “I’m very sorry, ma’am. It’s just that this is not a toy, and is painted with lead paint. It’s not safe for him to be playing with, and definitely not safe to chew.”

    Mother: “What?! It shouldn’t have been within his reach! What kind of death-trap store is this?!”

    Me: “I’m so, so sorry, ma’am. Another customer must have moved it. I ought to have spotted it sooner. ”

    (I’m feeling guilty, until the kid pipes up.)

    Kid: “Mommy, I was quiet! You said I could have it if I was quiet!”

    Me: “Ma’am, you didn’t give this to your child, did you?”

    Mother: “How was I supposed to know it was dangerous?”

    Me: “Ma’am, there are distinct signs all around the figurines.” *I point to the four signs posted around the figures* “Also, they’re kept well out of the reach of children for exactly that reason.”

    Mother: “I don’t have time to read f***ing signs! They shouldn’t have been in my reach either!”

    Me: “I agree completely, ma’am.”

    Let’s Hope He Doesn’t Still Jump On The Bed

    | TN, USA | Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers

    (I work in a call center doing reservations for a sizable hotel chain. Our system is set up to not only put in the number of adults but the number and age of children as well.)

    Me: “Okay, so how many adults and children will be in the room?”

    Caller: “Well, it depends what age you consider a child.”

    Me: “Well, I can put them in as a child, and if they’re too old, my system will adjust them to an adult automatically.”

    Caller: “Okay, then. Two adults and one child.”

    Me: “And the age of the child, please?”

    Caller: “43.”

    Why The Long Face

    | CA, USA | Family & Kids

    (A customer approaches me at the cash desk.)

    Customer: “You remind me of my daughter.”

    Me: “Oh, thank you.”

    Customer: “I call her Pony-Face!”

    She Isn’t Playing Around

    | MA, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids

    (I’m ringing out an elderly customer while a coworker of mine greets new customers entering the building. I’m conversing with my customer when I hear a new customer’s daughter, about 6 years old, speaking loudly to my coworker.)

    Little Girl: “No! No more toys! I have enough toys as it is! They’re all over my room and my living room!”

    (She starts to list the various types of toys she has. The list goes on for quite some time.)

    Little Girl: “…And that’s why I don’t need any more toys!”

    My Customer: “Wow, you don’t hear that all that often!”

    A (Po)Lite Snack

    | NM, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Top

    (The theater I work at is cheap; the tickets are roughly half-price of the regular theaters. We get a lot of families, children and seniors, but have recently had a rash of extremely rude children. I’m working concession when a young boy—about 7 years old—comes up with his Mother. He takes a long time reviewing the menu and prices, so I ask him if I can help.)

    Boy: “I need to buy snacks, please. I have $9.”

    Me: “$9 is a great amount! Let’s see what we can get for you.”

    Boy: “Hmmm. May I have a water, please?”

    Me: “Of course, but if you’d like, I could sell you a cup instead. The water is $2.50; the cup is $0.25 and you can refill it as much as you’d like.”

    (He agrees to get the ice cup, and starts counting his money on the counter.)

    Boy: “Ma’am? Thank you for your suggestion about the cup!”

    (Stunned that this small child is so polite and well-spoken, I turn around to see if his mom is coaching him. She’s not.)

    Me: “You’re very welcome, young man! What else may I get for you?”

    (The boy thinks a little at this point, looking at the candy case.)

    Boy: “Every month I take my mom on a date. I already took her to dinner, then we got ice cream, and now I’m taking her to a movie! I need to make sure I treat her right!”

    Me: “That’s so thoughtful! You are a wonderful son, and a very polite young man!”

    Boy: “I love my mom. She’s the best!” *smiles*

    (Moved by his thoughtfulness, his manners, and his absolutely charming smile, I decide to help him out a bit.)

    Me: “Okay, here you are: your cup, a popcorn and a candy. It’ll be $3.25.”

    Boy: *confused look* “Okay?”

    (He hands me $4 after I assure him that his total is $3.25, so I start ringing him up.)

    Boy: “Ma’am? Can you keep the change for yourself as a tip?”

    (My heart melts at this. I did keep the change, but I put it toward the remaining $3.25 I hadn’t charged him, and then covered the rest out of my own pocket. He thanked me again and walked off hand-in-hand with his mom. All of the employees were tickled to see this little boy on his ‘date’ with Mom, and were very glad we were able help by paying for part of his concession but also get to let him feel like a grown-up by paying for part of his snacks. Later, as he’s leaving, I see him putting his trash into the can in the lobby. He sees me and begins to wave.)

    Boy: *waving* “Have a very good night!”

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