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  • Category: Family & Kids

    Finders Stealers

    | Wilmington, VT, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Family & Kids, Money

    (I am bagging groceries at the checkout for a family during Christmas week. This is the busiest week of the year, with many rich out-of-staters coming up to go skiing.)

    Little Girl: “Mommy, look what I found! What should I do with it?”

    (I look over and see that the little girl has found money on the ground.)

    Mother: “Shhhh! Just put it in your pocket, quick!”

    (Knowing our store’s policy, I speak up.)

    Me: “Actually, if you don’t mind, can I hand it into the service desk? That way, if the person who lost it returns, they can get it back.”

    (The little girl hands it to me willingly and I go hand it in. A couple minutes later, the parents come up to the service desk.)

    Father: “My little girl found some money on the ground, and some employee made her hand it in. However, I think she should just have it.”

    Manager: “Store policy says that if no one comes to claim it after 30 days, then the person who found it—your little girl, in the case—can have it.”

    Father: “But it was all tightly rolled up! The person who dropped it was obviously using it to snort coke or something!” *leaves with his family*

    (Ten minutes later, the same family managed to con their way into getting the money by speaking with a different employee at the service desk. The real, original owner—one of our regulars—came in two hours later inquiring about $40 he dropped, which at that point was unfortunately long gone.)

    Just Gender Role With It

    | New Berlin, WI, USA | Family & Kids, Top

    (I work in a gas station and am the only female employee that works the second shift on a regular basis. I have very short hair and am often mistaken for male if customers aren’t paying attention. Sometimes, it is a great source of amusement for me because it seems to bother them more than it bothers me. One early evening, a customer comes in with her little girl who is probably about 4.)

    Me: “Did you find everything all right?”

    Customer: “Yeah, just this and…” *to her daughter* “Did you find the candy you want, sweetie?”

    (I notice now that the little girl is giving me a horrified look as if I have just told her there is no Santa.)

    Customer’s Daughter: *starts pulling on her mother’s shirt* “Mommy! Mommy! Is that a boy or a girl?”

    (The mother ignores her, but the little girl continues to ask and gets progressively louder each time. I am finishing running her credit card and hand her the receipt. At the top of every receipt is the name of the cashier. The woman picks up her daughter who is now glaring at me and finally answers her after reading my obviously female name.)

    Customer’s Daughter: *now yelling so loud everyone in the store can hear* “MOMMY!!! IS IT A BOY OR A GIRL?!”

    Customer: “Shh! She’s a girl, sweetie. Now hush.”

    (I’m trying very hard not to laugh, as everyone in the store is now staring.)

    Me: “Mystery solved! Have a good—”

    Customer’s Daughter: *shrieking* “WHY DOES SHE HAVE SUCH SHORT HAIR?!”

    Customer: *turning six shades of red* “Because some women just like their hair to be short.”

    (The customer’s daughter turns to me and points accusingly.)

    Customer’s Daughter: “YOU! You shouldn’t have such short hair! Girls have long hair! DUH!”

    (After the woman has left with her boisterous, opinionated child in tow, a regular customer comes to my register.)

    Regular: *jokingly* “Well, hello again, young man! Having a good evening?”

    Necessity Is The Daughter Of Incomprehension

    | Orlando, FL, USA | Family & Kids

    (A mom and daughter come up to my checkout. As I ring up the items, the mom notices the novelty pens by the register.)

    Customer: “How cute! Do you want one, honey?”

    Customer’s Daughter: “I don’t need one.”

    Customer: “That’s not what I asked. Do you want one? How often does your mom say that?”

    Customer’s Daughter: “I don’t need one.”

    Customer: “Look, they light up! Which color do you want?”

    Customer’s Daughter: “Doesn’t matter. I don’t need a pen.”

    Customer: “Choose a color or I’ll choose for you!”

    Customer’s Daughter: “Mom, you’re wasting money!”

    Customer: *to me* “We’ll take the blue one.”

    Two And A Half Customers

    | San Jose, CA, USA | Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers

    (Our salon requires a credit card hold for parties of three or more to discourage last-minute cancellations. It doesn’t matter how old the customers are. Whether they are 3-year-olds or 80-year-olds, we still reserve a spot for them regardless. We have a lot of customers who try to get around the credit card rule.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [salon], how can I help you?”

    Caller: “Hi, I wanted to make appointments for two people today.”

    Me: “Sure, what kind of services would you like?”

    Caller: “Two pedicures.”

    (I book the appointments, confirm with the caller, and am about to end the call.)

    Caller: “I also wanted to bring my daughter in for a kid’s pedi.”

    Me: “Oh okay, so you’re actually booking for three people?”

    Caller: *sounding annoyed* “Does she even count? She’s just a kid.”

    Me: “Yes, she does. She’s still a person.”

    Caller: “That’s ridiculous!”

    Even Customers Fall Short

    , | Kansas City, Missouri, USA | Family & Kids, Underaged

    (I am in a local dollar store/pharmacy. This happened to me when I as ten years old. An elderly looking woman comes up.)

    Customer: “Do you work here?”

    Me: “Me?”

    Customer: “Yes, you.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m still in grade school.”

    Customer: *mumbling while walking away* “Lazy employees. Always coming up with excuses!”

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