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  • August Theme Of The Month: Best. Customer. Ever!

    Category: Family & Kids

    Bad At Protecting Her Child

    | Charleston, SC, USA | Family & Kids

    (A customer walks with a toy that usually prompts me to sell a buyer protection plan, or toy insurance as I like to call it.)

    Me: “All right, ma’am, would you like to add a protection plan to this?”

    Customer: “No, my child will break it within a week.”

    Me: “Well, that’s a perfect reason for the buyer protection plan! It covers all damages.”

    Customer: “No, no. She’ll break it, so it won’t matter!”

    Pray For This Child

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Family & Kids

    (A newborn baby is getting its first check up and gets the all clear.)

    Nurse: “Any questions?”

    Father: “Is it normal for the baby to pass wind?”

    An Overly-Expectant Mother

    | MD, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Family & Kids

    (I work as a cashier in a popular clothing store. During the daytime we often have stay-at-home moms come in. In the area I work in, they are often very out of touch with reality. This one customer comes in alone with four small children in tow. I am the only cashier on the floor and I am about to do my regular check on the fitting room.)

    Customer: “I need you to watch my kids while I go find a bathing suit.”

    Me: “I cannot watch your children. You need to keep them with you.”

    Customer: “Why not? You’re standing here anyway. Just watch them. I’ll be a minute.”

    Me: “Ma’am, take your children with you. Leaving them alone is a liability that the store does not assume.”

    Customer: “It’s just for a minute! Watch them for ONE minute!”

    Me: “No. Keep your children with you or I will have to ask you to leave. You are not allowed to leave your children in the store unattended.”

    Customer: “Oh, for crying out loud! Do any of you people understand what customer service is about? Where am I supposed to leave my children to shop?”

    Me: “With a babysitter. There is also a drop-in daycare center two blocks away.”

    Customer: *throws her hands up* “You’ve ruined my day. I guess moms aren’t allowed to shop!”

    Me: “You can shop with your children. We allow children in the store if they’re with their parents.”

    Customer: “Sometimes I need a break, too! Why is that so much to ask?!”

    Me: “Well, that’s what the daycare centers are for. You could always try one of those.”

    Customer: *storming away* “I guess I’m not allowed to shop now that I have kids!”

    Not Tipped To Be A Good Night

    | NY, USA | Family & Kids, Money

    (A woman’s 60th birthday party of about 100 in our fancy venue has just ended. The party in general hasn’t been very good tippers despite their flashy attire, many requests, and heavy drinking, but the people are nice enough.)

    Guest Of Honor’s Relative: *approaches DJ* “I just want to say thank you so much! The music, the ambiance you provided, was perfect and we all had a wonderful time!”

    DJ: “Thank you, miss. No problem, we had a good time.”

    Guest Of Honor’s Relative: *approaches a coworker and me changing a tablecloth* “Thank you so much! You worked so hard, the food was delicious, and the service was absolutely great. On point. We will definitely be back! You guys deserve a raise in salary tonight!” *winks, squeezes my arm, and walks away*

    Me: *whispering to coworker* “Yeah, it’s called a tip…”

    Refunder Blunder, Part 12

    | Surrey, BC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Technology

    (Its ten minutes to close and I’m in the process of closing my store. A customer comes in with a store bag.)

    Customer: “Hi, I bought a helicopter from you guys a few months ago. I was wondering if I could exchange it?”

    Me: “Sure, what seems to be the problem?”

    Customer: “My son flew it into a tree.”

    Me: “All righty, I just need the receipt, and if you’ll pass me the copter I can see how much damage it’s sustained.”

    Customer: “Oh, I don’t have the helicopter. It’s still in the tree. And I don’t have a receipt either, I don’t keep receipts. I brought the controller so you can see I actually bought it, and I’m not lying to you.”

    Me: “Okay, the controller matches the copters we sell here, but I can’t just exchange the controller for a new box. I need the copter as well. And a receipt.”

    Customer: “But I bought it here; the controller is proof!”

    Me: “I don’t doubt that you bought it from here, sir, but I really do need everything that was in the box, including the helicopter, in order for me to do anything.”

    Customer: “Well, that’s stupid. You’re telling me I drove two hours to merely exchange this copter for my son, and it was all in vain?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but I really can’t do anything until I have the copter and a receipt.”

    Customer: “Well, that’s stupid. What kind of policy is that?!”

    Me: “I think you’ll find most stores exercise the same policy as we do about not having the product you’re exchanging.”

    Customer: “Fine! Give me your manager’s card and I’ll be back! You haven’t heard the end of this!”

    (He never came back and nothing else has come of this.)

    Related:
    Refunder Blunder, Part 11
    Refunder Blunder, Part 10
    Refunder Blunder, Part 9

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