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    Category: Family & Kids

    Sadly This Job Isn’t Child’s Play

    | OH, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

    (I work in an arcade, which also has a kids’ gym. Right by the only entrance and exit, there is a sign which clearly says that employees are not babysitting the area, and that kids may leave without parents. However, I do try and keep the younger kids from leaving without supervision. One day I let two younger boys out to use the bathroom. Less than a minute later, their mother comes up to me.)

    Mother: “Did you see my two sons leave?!”

    Me: “Yes, I let them run to the bathroom.”

    Mother: “WHAT?! Why would you let them out?! One of them is only two!”

    Me: “Ma’am, it’s not my job to watch your kids.”

    Mother: “YOU STILL SHOULDN’T HAVE LET THEM OUT!”

    Me: “Ma’am, please stop yelling. I did ask where they were going, and made sure they knew where the bathrooms were. I also checked that they went in the right direction.”

    Mother: “You still shouldn’t let them out!”

    An Ocean Of Reasons To Kick Them Out

    | England, UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Pets & Animals, Theme Of The Month

    (I work at a famous English theme park, specifically in the sea life centre. As part of my job I supervise the rock pools where customers can touch and feel starfish, cleaning shrimp, crabs etc. The customer has been standing with his child with his hands in the rock pool for a good ten minutes, despite the queue behind him.)

    Customer: “Can these shrimp live out of the water, then?”

    Me: “It is quite dangerous for them to be taken out of the water for long, sir.”

    Customer: “What about the starfish?”

    Me: “They also should be left in the water at all times.”

    Customer: “Can my son hold one?”

    Me: “He can hold them under the water, sir, but we don’t permit guests taking the sea life away from the water. He can also let the cleaner shrimp clean his hands under the water, but they can’t be taken out either.”

    (The customer and his son completely ignore what I just said and grab a starfish, holding it in the air.)

    Me: “Sir, I’ll need you to put that starfish back in the water! You really can’t take the sea life out of the water, and although you’re more than welcome to come and queue again the other customers are waiting their turn.”

    (The customer mutters to his son while laughing, despite the fact that I can clearly hear them.)

    Customer: “Get a shrimp, d***-head!”

    (The next thing I know the boy has walked away practically crushing a cleaner shrimp in his hand. It took me and three other co-workers to escort the now swearing man and his not-so-pleasant son out of the sea life centre. And yes, the little boy killed the poor cleaner shrimp.)

    A Boy For All Seasons

    | Denver, CO, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Health & Body

    (I’m taking a four-year-old boy back for a check up. He seems a little nervous so I’m talking to him to make him calm down a little bit. Note: the Broncos are playing in the play-offs.)

    Me: “Is it still snowing outside? You look like you’re freezing!”

    Kid: “Uh-huh, I don’t like the cold!”

    Me: “Aw, that’s too bad. I love the cold. I love it when it’s winter! What’s your favorite season?”

    Kid: “Post-season!”

    Me: “Huh, what? Can you name the four seasons?”

    Kid: “Duh! Pre-season, regular season, post-season and off-season! The Broncos made it to post-season! YAY!”

    (Little guy sure showed me! And wasn’t nervous for the rest of his visit.)

    Time To Separate The Horse From The Goats

    | VA, USA | Family & Kids, Pets & Animals, Theme Of The Month

    (We offer pony camps during the summer to kids wanting to learn to ride. We have very calm, safe horses to ride, and take all safety measures, but some parents are naturally worrisome.)

    Mom: “Those horses are awfully big… Don’t you have something smaller for my daughter?”

    Me: “Ma’am, I assure you, all of our horses are sweet. I’ve ridden all of them over my years here.”

    Mom: “I just think that they’re too big for her. Maybe something smaller? Like a miniature horse?”

    Me: “Ma’am, you can’t really ride a miniature horse…”

    Mom: “Oh! What about that one! It’s perfectly sized for her!”

    Me: “Uh… Ma’am… that’s a goat.”

    (At this point, the daughter was bright red. She ended up riding one of our largest horses and did awesomely. And poor Benny the goat didn’t have to worry!)

    All Meals Come Pre-Blessed

    , | USA | Family & Kids, Funny Names, Religion

    (At the restaurant I work at all of the employees names are written on a wall. A little girl around the age of six and her dad walk in. While waiting for their food she is reading the names out loud and spots the name Jesus.)

    Girl: “Daddy, look, they have Jesus working here! That’s so awesome. Now we don’t have to pray before this meal!”

    (Jesus got a chuckle out of this as the dad quickly explained it is a name pronounced ‘hey-Zeus.’)

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