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    Category: Family & Kids

    In Desperate Need Of Some Context

    | Portland, OR, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids

    (I’m stocking and straightening movies on the bottom shelf of a display, so I am crouched down. A man and woman walk past me holding hands, obviously not noticing me.)

    Woman: “No! You can not have sex with your sister!”

    How To Spot A Smoking Gun

    | Shrewsbury, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Family & Kids

    (I manage a tobacco store and the law says we cannot sell any tobacco products to anyone under 18 and MUST card if customer looks under 30. A young girl and older woman enter store and at the door the young girl hands cash to older woman. Right away I know that she is underage and older woman is buying for her which is illegal. I know I cannot sell at this point but let them come in to see how it goes down.)

    Me: “Hello, how are you? What can I get for you today?”

    (Both stand there staring intently at the cigarette display without speaking. After a solid minute I ask the older woman:)

    Me: “What brand do you normally smoke?”

    (She turns to young girl and says:)

    Woman: “Well? What do you smoke?”

    (I immediately address the young girl and ask for I.D.)

    Woman: *very rudely* “I’m buying them, not her!”

    (I state that now I know she is buying for a minor I legally cannot sell either one cigarettes.)

    Girl: *starts screaming at woman* “Grandma! WHY DID YOU ASK ME THAT? Now I can’t get my smokes!”

    Upgraded Complaints

    , | MT, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (I used to work at the local big-name ice cream and burger restaurant eight years ago. The night shift lead is the owner’s son that was just a little runt when I worked there. On this trip through the drive thru I order a small ice cream cone for me and a blended drink for my husband. We get the drink, but while the cashier is taking another order he opens the window:)

    Shift Lead: “So, she accidentally made a large cone instead of a small one. Is that still okay?”

    Me: *I raise an eyebrow and scoff dramatically* “No! It. Is. Not. Okay! You are giving me more for my money and it’s just unacceptable!”

    Shift Lead: *grinning and handing me the cone* “Gosh darn us for giving you a free upgrade, right?”

    Me: “Gripe, gripe, gripe. Obligatory threat to complain to your father, young man!”

    Shift Lead: *laughing* “Yeah, you have a good night, too!”

    Customer Service To Swear By

    | Bay Area, CA, USA | Family & Kids, Language & Words, Movies & TV

    (My husband and I work at the same small store. This day he is helping a woman and her five- or six-year-old son while I am wiping down a counter nearby.)

    Son: “[Name] watches adult movies.”

    Husband: “Oh?!”

    Customer: *quickly* “He means his cousin watches movies rated PG-13 or R.”

    Husband: *laughs*

    Son: “They have bad words in them.”

    Husband: “Yeah, I don’t like bad words. They hurt my head and my heart, and make angels cry!”

    (I had to bite the inside of my lip, and had to avoid looking at my husband to keep from laughing. My husband is a former member of the Navy, and still swears like a sailor!)

    Will Make It Up To You

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Health & Body

    (I work for a popular makeup company that provides free ‘make-unders’ to clients for special occasions and events. I work in a full sized boutique. I have a client in for a homecoming look. She looks about 16. Her mother is there with her as well.)

    Client: “This is such a cool job. I’d love to work here.”

    Me: “Well, how old are you? You have to be 18 to work here.”

    Client: “Darn! I’m 17 for another few months. So close.”

    Mother: “Anyway, honey, you need to get a REAL job. You’re better than being a makeup counter girl.”

    (I proceed to drop the brush I’m using because I was so surprised that someone would say that right in front of my face. Her daughter looked mortified and gave me an apologetic look. I go behind the counter and get an application.)

    Me: “Here, fill out this application. I’ll put in a good word for you when you turn 18.”

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