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    Category: Criminal/Illegal

    Recipe For Disaster

    | Vancouver, WA, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Top

    (A customer comes up to the pharmacy counter. Keep in mind, Sudafed (pseudoephedrine) is controlled in all 50 states as it is used to make methamphetamine.)

    Customer: “I need some Sudafed.”

    Me: “Did you want Sudafed or [store brand]?”

    Customer: “What’s the difference?”

    Me: “The active ingredient is the same but sometimes they change the inactive ingredients. It still works the same though. Plus, [store brand] is about 5 bucks cheaper.”

    Customer: “The recipe said I need Sudafed.”

    Me: “…”

    Customer: *realizing what she said* “Um, s***. Never mind, I got to go.”

    (Not So) Smooth Counterfeiting

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Criminal/Illegal

    (I am ringing up a customer when he hands me a 100 dollar bill.)

    Me: “Alright, I just need to check it really quick.”

    (I hold the bill up to the light.)

    Customer: “It’s okay. I just printed it.”

    A Nugget Of Truth Can Get You In Trouble

    , | KY, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Food & Drink

    (The fast food restaurant I work at has a bar right behind and our drive-thru stays open until 2 am. Like most fast food places, we cannot serve you in the drive-thru if you aren’t in a car.)

    Customer #1: *walks up and bangs on the drive-thru window* “Hey!”

    Me: “Yes?”

    Customer #1: “I want a cheeseburger and some fries. Oh and a shake.”

    Customer #2: “And nuggets, don’t forget nuggets!”

    Me: “Sir, I can’t serve you unless you are in a car.”

    Customer #1: “But I’ve been drinking.”

    Me: “I understand, but it’s not safe to have people in the drive-thru when they aren’t in their car.”

    Customer #1: “Okay.”

    (About 20 minutes later, they pull around very fast, passing the menu. I notice his unfinished beer is sitting between his knees.)

    Customer #1: “Okay. I want a cheeseburger–”

    Me: “Sir, do you realize that you are now drinking and driving and I can call the police?”

    (Customer #1 goes white and starts to drive away.)

    Customer #2: *as they pull away* “You forgot my nuggets!”

    This Deal Is A Steal

    | Iceland | Criminal/Illegal, Tourists/Travel

    (I’m assisting a tourist that is looking for a t-shirt to take home with pictures of Iceland on them.)

    Me: “Well, we don’t sell those t-shirts but there are quite a few of them down town and I know of one that has a 3 for 2 special offer on t-shirts.”

    Customer: “Could you also explain to me what a 3 for 2 offer is?”

    Me: “Sure, it means that you get 3 t-shirts for the price of 2.”

    Customer: “I don’t understand, so we steal the 3rd one? Isn’t shoplifting illegal here like in the states?”

    Me: “Yes, shoplifting is illegal here, but you wouldn’t be stealing the 3rd shirt. It just means that you choose 3 t-shirts and pay for 2 and then get the 3rd as a free gift sort of.”

    Customer: “I don’t get it.”

    Me: “You choose 3 t-shirts, and as the sales person scans them in to the register you get a 100% discount on the 3rd t-shirt. Therefore, you’ll get it for free with the other 2.”

    Customer: “I’ll go down there, but if they arrest me for shoplifting, I’m telling the police that you told me to!”

    What Came First, The Idiot Or The Egg

    | Tasmania, Australia | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal

    (After scanning some eggs I open the box look inside and close it again.)

    Customer: “Why are you looking it the egg carton?”

    Me: “I’m checking to make sure there are no broken ones.”

    Customer: “Oh, I thought it was to make sure people weren’t stealing stuff by hiding it in the eggs…”

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