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    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Breaking The Bathroom Breaking

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Transportation

    (I am taking a four-plus hour flight. It’s a full flight, so our row is full. I’m in the middle seat. The passenger in the window seat is ordering carbonated water and alcohol every time the flight attendant comes by. She has been doing this for hours and is getting up to pee every few minutes; aggravating the rest of us.)

    Window Passenger: *to the aisle passenger in the seat next to her* “Can you move? I need to use the bathroom.”

    Aisle Passenger: *in aisle seat* “You’ve been doing this every few minutes! Could we switch seats? It’ll be easier if you have the aisle seat.”

    Window Passenger: “No! I want this window seat. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go.”

    (She goes, comes back, sits down, and orders another water, which she gulps down. Eight minutes pass.)

    Window Passenger: “Excuse me, move! I need to get to the bathroom!”

    (She goes. The aisle passenger and I are both tired, because we’re trying to sleep and she keeps waking us, and we’re angry because her shoes are getting dirt on us.)

    Me: “Look, man, move into the window seat. I’ll deal with her.”

    (He moves into the window seat just as she comes back. The window passenger instantly yells at him.)

    Window Passenger: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SEAT?!”

    Me: “I told him to move there.”

    Window Passenger: “YOU HAVE NO RIGHT!”

    Me: “YOU have no right! You’ve made 24 bathroom trips in three hours. We’re trying to sleep, and you’re climbing over us every few minutes and getting dirt from your shoes on our clothes! You left bruises on my leg where you climbed on it! This guy offered to let you sit in the aisle seat, and you said no!”

    Window Passenger: “B****! I’LL TELL THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT!”

    (The flight attendant is called, and I tell him the story.)

    Flight Attendant: *to the window passenger* “Normally, ma’am, I’d side with you, but in this case, I think the young lady is right. It’s very disruptive to our other passengers for you to be climbing over them every few minutes. The gentleman vacated a perfectly good aisle seat, which you will have to use as the flight is full.”

    Window Passenger: “F*** ALL OF YOU! I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU’RE DOING THIS TO ME!”

    (She does, however, sit down and stop ordering drinks. She sulks for the rest of the flight, and upon landing, rushes off the plane as fast as she can.)

    Piercing Judgments, Part 2

    | New York, NY, USA | Bigotry, Crazy Requests, Love/Romance, Top

    (I am a waiter in a high-class restaurant. In my section is a cute couple, and from the looks and blushing, it appears they’re on their first date. Both have several visible piercings, and from what I can see on the young woman, they both have tattoos. They’re talking quietly to each other, not disturbing anyone. I’m called over to a nearby table with a dining couple in their mid-forties.)

    Me: “Yes, ma’am, how may I help you?”

    Diner: *loudly* “I want that disrespectful couple out!”

    (The diner points to the other couple. Both look up.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. What seems to be the problem?”

    Diner: “Look at them! They’re disgusting! That woman shouldn’t be seen in public!”

    (I see the young woman’s head go down.)

    Diner: “And that man should be ashamed! They’re ruining the entire atmosphere!”

    (Now both of the couple are looking at their plates. I can barely hear the young woman mumble to her date.)

    Young Woman: “Maybe we should go…”

    (Both start to stand. I motion for them to sit. I turn back to the loud diner.)

    Me: “Ma’am, I am going to have to ask you and your husband to leave.”

    Diner: *scoffs* “What for?!”

    Me: “For disturbing the peace, and ‘ruining the atmosphere.’ I will escort you to the door.”

    Diner: “You can’t do that!”

    Me: “Alright, I’ll go get my manager and have him escort you out.”

    (Sure enough, my manager agrees with me and makes the older couple leave.)

    Woman: “You’ve just lost your best customers, you heathen!”

    (The young couple thank me, and they get 10% off their check for their troubles. They come back every couple of months, requesting me. The last time they come in, there is a decent sized rock on the young woman’s finger.)

    Related:
    Piercing Judgments

    Lunch Lady Is No Lady

    | MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I am helping a customer who, with her six-year-old son, pick out stain for her deck. I am the only person in the paint department. Another customer comes up to my desk. I call for backup.)

    Me: *to Customer #2* “It should only be a few minutes wait.”

    (After about 30 more seconds, Customer #2 storms down the aisle to where I am still working with Customer #1.)

    Customer #2: *to Customer #1* “This isn’t personal shopper day! Other people need help; you need to get your s*** and leave!” *to me* “Get your a** on the phone and get someone over here to serve me, b****!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, he was with another customer. I’m sure he’ll be here soon.”

    Customer #2: *goes back to the desk to wait* “B****!”

    Me: *to Customer #1* “I’m sorry about that—”

    Customer #1′s Young Son: “It’s okay lady! She is my lunch lady, and she is mean to EVERYONE! Don’t listen to her; you’re doing great helping mommy!”

    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 23

    | The Netherlands | Crazy Requests, Money

    Customer: “I have a direct debit, but now you’re charging me extra costs. Why? You can just take the money from my account!”

    Me: “Well we tried twice, but the bank refused the payment. That’s why we sent you two reminders before adding the costs. Did you receive the letters?”

    Customer: “Probably, but I never read your mail because I have a direct debit.”

    Me: “But how are we supposed to let you know something is wrong if you don’t open the mail? We’re not sending you spam; we’re sending you a legitimate message.”

    Customer: “Yeah, but as I said I don’t read them. So, now I feel I don’t have to pay the costs, because I didn’t know the payment failed.”

    Me: “But we told you in the letters that the payment failed. Twice.”

    Customer: “I DON’T READ THEM. You should have let me know!”

    Me: “We did! How else were you expecting to receive our notices?”

    Customer: “I don’t know! I just think the costs shouldn’t be charged.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but the costs are correct. You just told me that you received our letters, but you don’t read them. We let you know that the bill wasn’t paid and stated in our letters when the payment was due to prevent the costs. I am fully willing to discuss payment, but you will have to pay the costs.”

    Customer: “I am not happy about this. I was expecting more from you.”

    Me: “More? What were you expecting besides two letters?”

    Customer: “I don’t know. Just… more…”

    (The customer did end up paying the costs. I’m still wondering to this day what kind of ‘more’ he expected from us.)

    Related:
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 22
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 21
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 20
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 19
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 18
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 17
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 16
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 15
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 14
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 13
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 12

    One Good Store Deserves Another

    | Lincoln, NE, USA | Crazy Requests

    (I’m stationed at the front register, and so most phone calls and customer questions go through me. An hour into my shift, the phone rings.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling Walgreens at [intersection]. How may I help you?”

    Caller: “What’s the address for the nearest CVS?”

    Me: “Ma’am, you’re calling Walgreens.”

    Caller: *irately* “Yes, and I want you to tell me where CVS is!”

    Me: “Well, I’m at [intersection], and there’s one right across the street, if that help—”

    Caller: *hangs up*

    (The incident is a little odd, but new customers come through my line almost immediately, and I forget about it. Three hours later, a customer comes in and heads straight for my register.)

    Customer: “What are the hours for the CVS pharmacy?”

    Me: “I’m not sure, ma’am. You’re actually in Walgreens.”

    Customer: *irately* “Yes, and I want to know the hours for CVS!”

    (At this point, I realize that this is the same customer I’d spoken to on the phone.)

    Me: “I don’t have any idea. We aren’t actually affiliated with CVS, but—”

    Customer: “GOD, you don’t have to be so rude to me! I’ll call your manager!” *storms out*

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